- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
FI and I have a friend that was once like a brother to both of us. This friend started dating a girl about 2 years ago, who we both knew, and somehow she has managed to pull him away from the majority of his friends.
When they first started dating she had a “best friend” who was always around. These girls acted like the typical “mean girls” making passive aggressive comments about people in our huge group of friends. Every year, a bunch of us plan a trip to go camping on the beach. Last year the “best friend” and her bf decided to go, but our friend and his gf didn’t. Before we left for the trip they went around and told everyone how annoying the “best friend” is and how she was going to make it a miserable time for all of us.
While on the trip, the “best friend” came up to me and said she wanted to appologize for how she has acted to all of us, and that the girl had talked so much crap about everyone that she had already judged everyone before getting to know them herself. She told me things that were said by our friend and his gf about a lot of our other friends. After this trip this “best friend” had a falling out with our friend and his gf over things that she found out from other people that we being said about her before the trip.
For no reason, the gf has talked badly about all of the girls in our huge group of friends, including myself. Apparently, she believes she is “above” the rest of us and has made numerous personal attacks on some of my friends. (i.e. she went up to my friend at the club and made a mean comment about her weight). This girl has also convinced our friend that some of his friends are not true friends, and has caused so much drama to the point where he no longer speaks to some of the people he was once the closest to.
Aside from me hearing what she’s said about me, FI and I have managed to stay out of the drama, we don’t really see our friend that much anymore, and I’m always as nice as I can be when I see this girl, but needless to say…I don’t like her. at. all.
For the most part, I believe our friend knows that not very many of his friends likes his gf, and he only seems to come around when she’s not around. They have broken up a couple of times, causing huge scenes in public that results in him venting to all of us about the horrible things she has said to him, and things she’s said about all of us. The next day, they’re back together. He is a completely different person when he is with her and all of us see it, but him.
About a month after we got engaged, our friend proposed to this girl…ugh…it was rumoured that she pretty much pressured him into it because of our engagement and another friend’s engagement.
When it came time to figure out our guest list, FI and I decided that we weren’t going to invite either of them. We hadn’t really hung out with him much recently and this girl is toxic and I do not want someone at my wedding who will cause drama and make some of my bridesmaids and other girl-friends uncomfortable. We felt like we couldn’t invite him and not her.
The other day, FI went out with the boys to play frisbee golf and our friend was there. He said all he talked about was how he couldn’t wait for FI’s batchelor party and that his was probably going to be early next year. FI said he feels bad for not inviting him, because when he is alone, without her he is the same old friend we always had.
We haven’t sent out STD’s yet, let alone invites, so we COULD still invite him and avoid the awkward drama of not inviting him, but I REALLY do not want his gf at my wedding. I mean, if you knew that someone has said horrible things about you and your closest friends, would you want that negativity around you on your big day?