Post # 1
Ok my boyfriend of pretty much 5 years and i was sitting down the other day watching tv and we were holding hands and he like “take that ring off”*smirks*..( i have this ring he gave me when first started dating it only fit on the ring finger so i wear it on my left hand even though i know means nothing and its just a plain steel ring, its still symbol of him) Im like “no why, its only finger it fits”….Then bf says “well that ring might go missing one day”…i pretended i didn’t know he was talking about ..(i think he may be planning on taking my ring to get my finger sized?) and asked him what he meant and he better not throw it away the ring is still special to me even there is nothing special to it.he looks down and shrugs his shoulders “idk might give to my other gf. Then he see’s a pregnancy test commericial and says “not yet”..and im like “yep! not until married 2-3 years”…bf says “yeah we can go to city hall” …i agreed and told him my plans and he listened
so tonight.we went going grocery shopping and talking in the car i told my bf im soo happy because ill pay of my credit card next pay and go shopping..and told him im kinda still going back and forth on what to get him but everyone else i figured out. Then bf says “i don’t even know what to get you….but i know what you are hoping for”…i played dumb im like “huh? what u mean”…he puts his left hand up…im like “huh??” boyfriend says “a ring”..i laugh say “um no…yea right that won’t happen”…bf says “haha glad you realized that”…then i said “well you know eventually if you want kids out of me it has to happen…but seriously i don’t care if you get me anything..i don’t give to get i like to make people smile BUT if u want to only thing i can think if is make up or gift card i really dunno myself so if you chose not to get me anything i swear i don’t care”…boyfriend says “ill give you a kiss and a hug” and im like “ok:)”….then he says “good christmas will be cheap…and i can by the new xbox!”
ps. he always said 3 years for any jewlery and 5 for engagment!…i reallly really hope it is coming this christmas…or our anniversary! he was early for the necklace…hope he tad early with the engagement…girl can only dream:/ like jeez man he knows my time line and plans and he said he wants same too..so he said but idk he could have just said that to shut me up???..Even though he brings shit up himself so idk this guy always been confusing and i know he said Not this year but soon and he wants to throw me off but common..think if there is nothing after anniversary i will talk to him :/
Think sounds fishy? ..im trying not get my hopes again:(
Post # 3
I did tell him last month when talking about weddings..the one thing i want him to do if or when he proposes is to catch it on camera. Just like he did for my beautiful necklace 2 years ago He put my necklace in like 4-5 different size boxes..and kept telling me weeks before he will need to put the camera on me when opening my gift.so im thinking omfg this is it!..i almost had a heart attack i was shaking and i open it..it was a necklace..Don’t get me wrong i love my necklace and it was romantic how he planned to give it to me but he does know i thought that year too was the day, he laughs at it lol So that was the point when i reminded him of that christmas.,i want him to at catch our engagement on camera lol
Post # 5
@truelove25: your part is very hard to understand.
You also posted almost three sane exact post a few days ago. I think you should sit down and have a serious chat with him if you want to be married by a certain point.
Post # 6
Wow I just realized that I have a ton of spelling errors in my post (above)! Guess that’s what I get for trying to use my phone to post quick before going into work! Anyways, I think you need to have a serious chat about it with him instead of constantly looking for hints and getting your hopes up like that.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!
…well your post was certainly hard to follow… but there is a part that stuck out to me..
boyfriend says “a ring”..i laugh say “um no…yea right that won’t happen”…bf says “haha glad you realized that”…then i said “well you know eventually if you want kids out of me it has to happen…but seriously i don’t care if you get me anything..boyfriend says “ill give you a kiss and a hug” and im like “ok:)”….then he says “good christmas will be cheap…and i can by the new xbox!”
If you want him to get you a ring then tell him. Don’t say “I don’t care if you get me anything” because you obviously do care. Men aren’t mind readers. Maybe he was planning a proposal for xmas and then when you say things like “um no” to a ring he reads that as no, you don’t want a ring (because that’s what you told him). If you want to be engaged by a certain date or by your 5 year anniversary, the only way for him to know that is if you tell him.
Post # 8
@truelove25: I’m not sure if your boyfriend plans to propose or not but what struck me about your post is that you seem to say a lot of things you don’t really mean and that can come back and bite you, hard.
For example, would you really be totally fine with your BF not getting you anything for Christmas and buying himself a new xbox? You are obviously also hoping for a proposal while telling him you understand and accept it won’t happen this year. You’re setting yourself up for big disappointments and resentment toward him.
I get that you’re trying to do the right thing. You’re hoping for a romantic surprise and trying not to pressure him. But in doing that, you might be going too far. It’s okay to tell him that yes, you are ready to get engaged. You don’t need to play dumb when you know he’s talking about giving you a ring or referencing your future.
After five years together, it’s okay to initiate a conversation with him about your future and what you want and need and when.
Post # 9
@truelove25: I think if he is asking you straight out if you want a ring, and you say no, that won’t happen, you probably shouldn’t be too disappointed if Christmas and anniversary go by with nothing. You should be honest and say, “I’d love that, but I want you to be ready too.”
And girl what were you doing when he wanted you to take your ring off?? Don’t play dumb! Take it off, give it to him, and let him get a ring that size for you!! I’m sure that is what he was going for.
It’s possible he could still propose since, yes, some of the things he’s saying is pretty fishy, but don’t be let down if he doesn’t becuase you kind of shot yourself in the foot by always telling him no.
Post # 11
i have not posted it three times..only twice lol once in my old post then decided to make a new one because no one was replying:p
@megz06: Are you saying he could of wanted to know if i wanted a ring for christmas and by me denying it i shot myself in the foot?..,you see here is the thing he always said he does not want me to be expecting it and he will propose when he is ready..and couple months ago when i asked him when he said “not this yeat but soon” but then he would bring it up more often and stuff then he stopped until last might pretty much.so i thoughy last night when he said “i know what you want..a ring”..i thought oh shit..do i say yes or do i just deny it but tell him that eventually i do want a proposal…so that is what i said because i thought MAYBE he was trying to see if im expecting it and make me think i won’t get anything then that way he can catch me off guard with a proposal on christmas day.
Im afraid of bringing it up now because if i mention it and that was his plan to surprise me..then he definitly won’t do it….soo what should i do now? im stuck:/
Post # 13
oh and last night we were talking about how we are pratically married because living together 2 years and boyfriend says “no we not ” and im like “yeah we are..marriage is really only a piece of paper”.,.and he like “yeah so why we gotta get married then.??”…and i said “well because i love you and want your last name” and he says “you know how much it costs to change your name to mine.”..then he says”lol you are going to flip out when the day comes when i propose and especially at our wedding….if we get married”…then i said “well ya..might be tears and on wedding if we have big wedding i probably might faint because ill be sooo nervous in front of everyone”.
ps. You know how he says he doesn’t know what to get me for christmas…well our first christmas i told him no gifts that year and he like “ok but you definitly better not be getting me anything because we agreed no gifts”..im like “yeah yeah”…got him a gift anyways and he was alittle upset but like i always tell him i don’t give to get. Anyways my point is…the fact that he knows im getting him something and he says he is not getting me a thing..and not even asking me what i want…i mean i gave him brief ideas..like gift card n make up but he didn’t even ask what kind…..soooooo im thinking he is hiding something;)???
Post # 14
I will admit, I think part of the reason you’re having such difficulty getting responses is that your posts are a bit difficult to read and hard to follow.
That being said, do you mind me asking how old you are? It sounds like the two of you have been together quite a while (about 5 years, right?) and at this point you really shouldn’t be playing these little ‘games.’
If you want something, be honest about it. Don’t pretend you’ll be okay not getting a proposal when in reality you are hoping for one. Echoing PPs here, men aren’t mind-readers. If he doesn’t think you’re that interested in a proposal, then chances are you’re probably not getting one.
Post # 15
I think it would be a good idea to communicate your feelings to him and see what he is planning for your future together. There seems to be a lot of jokes and back and forth, which is fun and fine but it’s obviously leaving you wondering and trying to read between the lines, which isn’t fair to you.
Post # 16
I suggest you put your posts in the Waiting board – I think the ladies there will better understand your position 🙂 In my mind, you need to chill the f out and stop overanalyzing everything; if you’re really anxious, just have a straight conversation with him about it. However, as I said, the ladies on the Waiting board seem more into analyzing the hints.