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Colors!! I've already order the BM dresses, and I'm STILL not sure=( I even considered paying the girls back for their dresses and starting all over again. I thought I had a "vision" when I picked the dress color, and now I have NO IDEA how to tie it all together and work in flowers and centerpieces.
Two things: sticking to the budget, and trying to explain to my mother how I don't want to invite a bunch of her friends that I've never met.
Definately sticking to the budget (we are paying ourselves)!!! There are so many things I'd love to have, but we just simply cannot afford it. But I still am very happy with what we have chosen thus far. I know it'll be great!
For us, it's going to be negotiating for the best price for the guests attending. I have 2 friends (married couple) who BOTH lost their jobs this last month (nice, high paying jobs) and it's awful. Just awful. Granted, now that we're not having the reception at our resort, we can more freely negotiate price and not worry at all about having x amount of people staying x amount of nights for the reception at all. We've leveled the playing field at our resort, room cost wise, and if they don't negotiate better, then we'll send the guests off to vrbo.com, for more substantial savings per night at our resort.
I'm also working on a beachfront, nearby more economic option. So far the Hampton Inn beachside there is brand new, has a built in breakfast for them, rooms are nice, and is on a prime spot on the ocean. They could literally walk over to the reception or the rehearsal dinner spot from there.
We want our friends to come, and we know that for everybody attending there will be some sort of travel expense (nobody lives in the same place anymore..that's what happens if you marry too long after college) and hey..it's a recession.
Dang this recession!
The bachelor party. It's brought out the worst in both of us. I was doing okay until I found out some of the plans and it sent me into a tailspin.
I worry about everything... that we'll have too many "yes" replies, that my (divorced) parents will get in a fight, that my fiance's grandmothers won't come, that someone will drop a bottle of red nail polish down my dress 10 minutes before the ceremony, that fiance's Serena van der Woodsen-lookalike sister will show up looking better than I do, that I'll yell at someone, that the ceremony will start late, that we won't get all our family pictures, that people will drink too much, that we'll go significantly over budget... the list goes on. So maybe the biggest obstacle is all the WORRYING!
Besides the budget... Bridesmaid dresses. While forking over my own money has been hard, it is not as hard as spending someone elses $$. I ended up picking three options that range from $140-200.
My biggest hurdle has been calling vendors. I am not a phone person and I am a huge pushover so I have a really hard time negotiating prices and contracts simply because I am afraid to speak up.. Luckily, this has really helped my communication skills quite a bit since I had to learn to be a bit more, er, forceful.
For us it is probably the budget! There are so many extra things we want and it all is very expensive. Like we are hiring a sushi chef for the cocktail hour, ceiling swags, host bar eeeek And invitation! They are so expensive!
Our biggest setback was FI getting layed off a few months into our planning. The money thing suddenly became an issue. Since we are paying ourselves, we talked it through, have worked hard, and are still on a good track for our goal. We did make some cut backs, but also just learned to live a more frugal lifestyle.
haha, biggest obstacle? My MOH making me want to cancel my wedding.
Other than that everything else has been a cake walk so far.
Distance is my biggest obstacle. My FI and I got engaged in early July 2009, and by August had picked May 22nd as our wedding date. Deciding on a location was tough, I'm from Ottawa, ON, he's from Woodstock, NB, and we met and live in a small town called Sackville, NB. We decided on Ottawa because my family is HUGE, plus it's gorgeous in May, but since we live in Sackville, all the planning is being done long distance. I went home for a week in November to do a lot of crazy wedding planning, but most things are being done by my mother and sister. It takes a lot of faith at times to believe that everything will get done. There are times when I wish we were getting married here, so I could see and do things for myself, but my family really enjoys the planning, and it's actually brought us closer together.
The venue, for sure. Nothing can be done without the venue and living in a tourist town in Idaho you have
A) The dated, over prices and tacky resort
B) Golf course/ Coutry clubs, the sheer ammount of golf clubs here thoroughly surprises me
C) You back yard, and since I live in an apartment, I doubt we were going to be able to fit everyone on my back patio...
Let's just say that fights occured.
Finally, after a LOT of research, countless phone calls and un returned e-mails a little ray of heaven came down in the form of an amazing venue complete with a wedding planner.
After that, it seems like everything is falling into place. The venue only allowed (not litterally) for a certain style and feel of dress (which I loved anyway), the planner has all the hook ups for our BBQ catering, DJ, rentals, etc. Decorations are now easier to plan (and eliminate) now that I know what it's going to look like.
Aw, smooth sailing...wonder how long this is going to last...
Like Mermaid said a year ago... Making priorities and sticking to them. My priorities include a low-stress, low-key, low-cost *nice* wedding for my fiance and myself.
I am a perfectionist by nature (and reinforced by my profession lol ... I've been in software quality assurance for 25 years.) So I could drive myself crazy needing everything to be just-so and exactly as I envision.
The main thing I'm focusing on is our wedding outfits... his is a $100 Calvin Klein black suit from Marshalls (will decide on his shirt, tie, and shoes soon.) Mine is either this dress from Ybridal.com http://www.ybridal.com/mother-of-the-bride-dresses/sheath-v-neck-sweep-train-chiffon-mother-of-the-bride-dress-mob0047.html
or a backup Calvin Klein I got for $40 from Marshall's (I love Marshalls LOL!). We'll look good in our portraits (which I may take myself.)
Beyond that, I don't care when/where/how. We've been engaged for 5 years and it's just freaking time to let the "right time" and perfect arrangements go... It hasn't been convenient for everyone else so whoever makes it makes it, whoever doesn't doesn't and no big whoop. I'm 50 years old and my second wedding so the whole princess bride thing doesn't suit me anymore anyway (so it's easier to keep arrangements and other people's expectations in check.)
Anyway, I'm rambling. My dress has been shipped so I'm getting a bit more geared up to finish the other minimalist arrangements.
budget & bridesmaid dresses! we found the PERFECT bm dress but it didn't come in any color that would work (despite coming in like, 20 colors) so we had to let it go. After that we spent two months looking for the other perfect one, but never really did... instead we found one that we all liked enough after a long day to settle for because we just didn't want to look anymore. They're great, really, but for the price I wish I'd known ahead of time that we would end up with something so beyond our original idea because it's SO different... we probably could've saved a TON of money if we had known what we'd eventually choose.
Oh well, it's over now, and I'm happy enough with them to just be happy that it's over!! The budget, however, is a different story...
I'll join in :)
My family. So far, I've overcome a lot of obstacles to make this wedding happen. I still don't even know if a lot of the family members are coming, but as long as there is no drama, that's all I care about.
3 things.
1 - I'm one of those planning while in an LDR girls.
2 - Ever tried planning a wedding when you can't set a date? TY US immigration. I have a "season" and the day he gets his visa I can set a date.
3 - my dress. I kinda know what I want. The designer picture is lovely. I've seen it available at one shop, but the actual pictures of women in the dress - OMG! Different dress and I mean that in a BAD way. Think of the BAD china knock off dresses. So I'll be taking my pictures to a dress maker - once I decide on color and fabric.
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