Post # 1
I’m just getting started on the planning and right now am just starting to set up appointments to see venues. From there, we’ll pick a date based on availability. A lot of people have told me the most stressful thing is finding a place for ceremony and reception. That seems too good to be true to me – I would imagine the stress comes from all the stuff like picking food, DJ, photographer etc. What do you think? What has caused most of your stress? Give a future bride some tips for trying to stay calm! 🙂
Post # 4
back when i was engaged it was budget and logistics, you invited x so you have to invite y, food costs HOW much?! and it was also the “feel” i wanted, did i want an elegant soiree or a casual bbq or did i want a mix of both.
Post # 5
i’m going to say parents. They seem to be the main cause of everybody’s distress
Post # 6
Congratulations on your engagement!
As for me, I don’t think that things have been too stressful – so I think I’m VERY lucky. The one thing that has given me and my fiance “angst” is the budget, since we’re paying for the wedding ourselves.
I think what has kept us sane, though, is enjoying every moment of the planning process and recognizing that at the end of the day, it’s just a party where we get to marry the person of our dreams! (keep in mind we’re not religious, so for us it’s just a party.. for others it may mean something different).
Post # 7
i’ld say trying to take everyones opinions/thoughts & wishes into consideration
Post # 8
@tessa – We are really lucky because our parents are covering the wedding. However, we’ve yet to sit down and discuss the straight up number. It won’t be anything extravagant because nobody is loaded!!
@crebre – I’ve been feeling that a little bit. How do I want the vibe to be, per say..
@Ejs4y8- Luckily our parents have just been excited.. but we live 8 hours away so that helps! hehe! your answer made me giggle.
@Tatrifon – thank you!! You have a good point about remembering why you’re getting married! We’re not religious either so we share your opinion of the big big fun party!!
Post # 9
um, for me, it was DEF. parents, and I was extremely surprised by this. It was the source of ALL our wedding stress, and made the few bumps we had in the road that much more traumatic, because I just kept waiting for it to blow up in my face like the drama with my parents. Honestly, just be prepared for things that you never even knew would bother people bothering them…it is completely true – weddings make people CRAZY! Things are completely fine with my parents, we’re getting married 2 weeks from today, and it’s all good, but MAN did we struggle getting here…so just a heads up on that one! Good luck with all your planning…
Post # 10
@sweetheartdealer:this caused me more angst than anything else, i was freaking out because just as soon as i saw one i’d see something i liked better. have you chosen a date yet? i would definitely say don’t choose a theme so early, sit back and relax and see what excites you more in terms of feel do you get butterflies when you see casual outdoors weddings (no matter if it’s fall, summer, spring, beach, etc) or do you get the flutters when you see everyone in black tie and candles? i would see which pictures you are drawn too and draw upon that atmosphere versus a theme (please remind me of this when i am engaged and going crazy).
Post # 11
budget and planning everything for a DW and not being able to have that control to see the actually place you are getting married. It takes a lot of faith and trust!
Post # 12
well, mine lived 4 hours away and everythign was cool until the day before the wedding. they were late to my rehearsal, late to my rehearsal dinner, and made ME late (b/c of course i was traveling with them) 30 min late to the wedding site.
They also made DH and I pay for our own lunch, even though we were paying for everybody at the wedding. They just did it very rudely by handing us the check which is VERY unlike my parents. I think they were “punishing” me for being on edge and not kissing butt and being all friendly
But yes, them being late4 was my hugest stressor. And now i get to relive it for all my friends wedding, who say “my parents will not do to me what yours did! they WILL be on time!” so at least they’ve learned =]
Post # 13
The budget is definitely hard but I thought the whole invitation process was stressful. Oh my gosh! First making the guest list was hard deciding who to invite, who to cut. Next getting addresses–how hard is it to answer a text message or email? Then I made all the invitations which took forever. I ended up needing way more postage than I expected. And then… the RSVP’s! I just think of how much time and money I spent on making the invites and the postage, when really, out of 61 invites, I got back 26 of the cards. The rest of the “RSVP’s” were random text messages, verbal answers, and emails that I practically had to beat out of my guests. As it is, two weeks til my wedding, I still have 19 more guests that have yet to respond. And when I F-I-N-A-L-L-Y reach someone, they’re so nonchalant about it, like “oh yeah I lost the invitation but I’m coming” two weeks after the RSVP deadline date. Gee, thanks!
Nothing else has compared to the frustration and stress I got from the whole invite process. Not even close.
Post # 14
- Wedding: October 2009 - Ceremony: The Kraine Theatre, Reception: Midtown Loft & Terrace
I think the most stressful part for me has been having divorced and remarried parents who can’t stand each other.
Second is definitely budget, but we’ve been dealing with that nicely!
Post # 15
Congratulations on getting engaged!!! Being engaged is SO fun and planning has been my favorite thing in the world!
The biggest dress so far has been finding a dress! It seems to be so easy for some and for others (me) it was difficult. I bought one dress and ended up being able to get a full refund and found my perfect gown. It all worked out in the end, but make sure that you are really sure before you buy it 🙂
Budget has also been stressful because we are paying for a lot of the wedding ourselves. I wouldn’t worry about the details like photographer, food, dj, etc. That stuff all falls into place if you do your research and stuff like that!
Let us know how your planning goes as you start making big decisions!!!
Post # 16
budget is a big stress, my parents are paying for our wedding too but you still have to deal with trying to figure out the budget and i’m one of those people who doesn’t want to spend a million dollars on one day so i’m going under what my parents are giving us (they’re letting us keep the rest). The guest list is another one, i’m very happy that it’s finished with, i never realized how hard it would be! we were putting together our two families and all of our family’s friends and we had to get it down to a pretty small number (110 people), not easy when my family equals out to be that number.