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Im not really sure what you are asking! Why wouldnt you tell your wedding date to your family and friends?
I have too many friends & family members who are either flying from far away, or lead such rigidly scheduled/busy lives, that if I didn't tell them far in advance, few would be able to attend! ;)
I've gone the opposite route -- I've emailed far-away friends, close friends, and wedding party members to ask if they have any blackout dates that they absolutely cannot attend to their knowledge (re: other weddings, previous plans, vacations, etc.). Since we haven't picked our venue yet, we're fairly flexible on dates, and want to be sure our closest peeps can be there before we zero in on one.
Which things do you want to be secret? Venue location? Because you do not need to include that on Save the Dates. Some people put date & town only (to make it easier for those booking flights), but you could just put down date. Also, there is no reason you cannot email your Save the Dates! That saves on postage too. :)
We're doing STD's for everyone because I found some really cute ones for very inexpensive.
We had to tell our guests because they were coming from out of town and needed to book flights and hotels.
i've been keeping my friends and family in the dark since we haven't signed the contract yet (we have the date reserved just haven't signed the papers yet b/c we needed to revise the first copy and everything has taken a few weeks) Our wedding venue is unique so i was going to keep it a secret until people rec'd invites (i just wanted to tell them date/state) but then i decided to start telling family slowly in person so we could see the reaction when we told them the date and location...now i've moved on to as soon as we sign the contract i will make an announcement for several reasons...1. i'm tired of everyone asking 2. although i'm really excited about the unique venue i didn't want to hype it up too much and have people not be wowed the way i think they should be...
i'm also not sending out save the dates...
@eimaj111683: We talked with a handful of close friends and family to help us narrow down the date. We were stuck between June 26 and July 3 (both Sundays). Our feedback was July 3, so we put down the deposit the next day. Then we did an informal "The Wedding Date is Set" on Facebook. Since we are going with a holiday weekend wedding, we are sending out Save the Date cards to give plenty of advance notice to the rest of our invitees. I think we may try to offset the postage cost by doing postcard replies with the invites. Not sure on that yet, but have a few months to ponder it.
When we set our date we said it loud and proud! We know how busy our families and friends are during the summer and wanted to be sure it's on their radar so they are able to plan accordingly. We're also sending inexpensive STD's (postcard design) mostly because I like the traditional aspect of sending them.
We don't have a date yet... just got engaged last Friday. It will be a small wedding, outdoor, nothing to extravagant... don't want the stress or money!! We will probably get married next September I am guessing.
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How many of you are telling your family& Friends the Date of your wedding and Reception?
I wanted some things to be a secret, and since I've kinda gotten rid of the Save the Date cards( there's no use in spending postage, and envelopes when you can just set out invites and rsvps all together. (YOU don't HAVE TO send out SAVE the DATES!) That's another way to cut down on your stationary costs.