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So my hub is a grad student and was taking a big exam (like a month long of research and writing) and had been trying his best to help with wedding stuff and take his test and do regular work stuff - ack. So he finally takes his exam about a month before the wedding and they pass him on the condition that he re-write it and re-defend but they make it due the friday before our wedding (yes, on the day of our out-of-town rehersal dinner).
I was livid. I saw one of his professors after the test and said 'so I heard you got me a fantastic wedding present' - luckily he took it as a joke but as I was close to tears I think he also realized i was pretty upset. If not I'm sure he heard me then walk into the office of one of my co-workers (we're all in research here) and rant about how they just failed him because they know he could do better but even so his was much better than most people's test. Then I walked into my office and cried (another co-worker saw my tear stained face).
Luckily, everyone seemed to understand the freak out and they put my FI on the fast track so he could get done and not miss the rehearsal.
How about you guys? Anything that is totally not you that you did leading up to the wedding just because of all the stress?
Well, our wedding is not anytime soon, but eighter way it's stressful.... especially when we have $0 budget. Nevertheless, I have been getting some things here and there. So, one day (don't even remember how it started) my FI got in an argument about different little wedding things that eventually---- I blew up! I even told him to forget it and just give everything I had (even my dress) to his brother's girlfriend (who wants to marry anyway).
Of course, he knew me better and after a few minutes (more like hours) he calmed me down and we continued with our planning. LOL, weird, I know. He made fun of me afterward that I was willing to give my stuff away, but I knew I'd never do that. 
i tried to tell my fi that he had to dictate to his brother when they are allowed to get pregant! it was nine months before our wedding, and his brother came out and said they wanted to get pregnant, we thought they meant like right that second they were going to start trying, so i started freaking out! his brother is our best man, his niece is our flower girl, and i had this picture of losing half of our wedding party plus his parents having to chose between our wedding and the birth of their grandchild. i know it's not ok to tell people when to have a baby based on your wedding, but come on, wait a few months! luckily it was a misunderstanding, they were going to wait a few months, and then decided not to try at all.
I had WW3 with my incredibly selfish mother and disinvited her from the wedding.
Turns out, it was worth it. She's nuts.
Oh, way too many things... I seem to piss people off and not even know how - I think I'm having a normal conversation or answering their questions nicely but I seem to totally infuriate them.
I'll let you know the end of the story when my FFIL will take my phone calls :( :(
I've just had (more) random spastic crying episodes than usual...
I've been told my "nice I-need-to-get-stuff-done-work-with-me" voice (or so I think) is really very NASTY and makes me sound like a bridezilla. oops.
I am new to the hive... kind of.. I actually have been lurking here for months as I was just too lazy to register but after seeing this post I couldn't stop myself. Our wedding is next October and I am already stressed over the guest list. Not really the amount of people but the character of some of them. So here are my inappropriate things:
I told my mom I REFUSE to invite my 1st cousin who I have ALWAYS been close to and never did a thing to me because I was afraid she would have a seizure at the wedding *I have seizures and I am taking a double dose of medication that day myself*.... I did realize the error of my ways and reverse this.
I told FH that his brother *also his best man* was not getting a guest because he is so on again / off again with his long term girlfriend who happens to be a bit on the crazy side. I said the only way he was getting a guest is if he was with someone else or the two were back together for several months pre wedding and she was medicated... Oh and he was on the PHONE with his brother while I was running my mouth.
My FH is insisting my FFIL do our photography since packages with pros are so expensive. His father is an amatur photographer and pretty good... but I REALLY want a pro... so I told him if his father does it then he's getting a vendor meal.... yeah I did take that back too...
Well this is a proper introduction I think.... Maybe I'll actually post once in awhile now lol.
You ever have that feeling of impending freakout? That's where I am at. 3 weeks til RSVP due date, almost a month until we travel to meet vendors for the destination wedding, 50+ invitations out and 16 have come back.
There's an upcoming massive FLIP OUT in my future.
I can't think of anything specific right now, but my FI has had to remind me that it's not "MY wedding", that it's "OUR wedding."
Oh oh FH just reminded me of the most inappropriate thing I have done. I included my ex on the guest list... now any other ex wouldn't have bothered him but this one tried to impede on our relationship a few times.... I dont have any sort of contact with him and we do not consider ourselves friends in any capacity - in fact our last exchange was volitile and extreme... why did I invite him? I am close to his parents, brother and sister and didnt' want to invite them and not him.
I almost burst into tears in front of my husbands good friend the night before the wedding. I was supposed to get my nails done the day before the wedding but didn't have time and I was really pissed off about it. So, at about 11pm the night before the wedding, when he asked me if I would spend the morning of the wedding getting hair and nails done, I got really upset. Not at him, just upset in general, the poor guy almost offered to come do them for me.
I cried like 10 times that day!
I screamed at a company because their "turquoise" favor boxes I ordered were baby blue. They let me keep the boxes AND refunded me all my money including shipping. I felt like a total witch and I was embarrassed that I made that big of a deal of $20 worth of favor boxes. My friends totally thought I was cra-ay-zy and they let me know it.
Oh, I almost forgot, I told some guy at interval international that he was personally responsible for ruining my honeymoon.
The place we booked closed unexpectedly and we had to stay somewhere different and not as nice.
I don't really regret telling this guy off, he was really rude!
I bought a second dress (well, my fiance it bought it for me cause he wanted me to be happy) and then decided that I actually really did like the first one. So I don't plan on wearing the 2nd dress at all. Luckily, he understands, but I sure felt guilty for a long time.
I flipped out and told my mom I didn't want her boyfriend at our wedding, and that no one in the family wanted him there, either. While that was all true, and she knows how we all feel about him, it was really inappropriate of me to scream it at her. She was being really difficult about him and where he sat and she wanted to dance with him during our family dance, etc. and it seemed like no matter what I did to ease her concerns, it didn't make her happy. So I flipped. I later apologized and said I was just emotional, and she got over it.
I ate an entire box of DeMets Turtles. They are 12 mini turtles. Yep I ate every single one of them in 2 days :(
I almost had a full on freakout at someone else's wedding because she was wearing a dress almost exactly like mine. I'm talking like left the reception for a good half hour, called my mom, friends, etc., was pissy all night kind of a freakout. But whatever, it was terrible. Especially because the FI isn't allowed to know anything about the dress so I couldn't tell him why I was upset.
I stand by my freakout. That entire experience totally sucked.
No official wedding freakouts yet but I did freak out over the summer at my FI"s friends wedding.
(this was all before we were engaged) So we were at a destination wedding that was for my boyfriends ex and his best friend, yes, his ex, that he was engaged to, too! Anyways the bridesmaids whore wearing the EXACT shade of blue i wanted for our wedding and the song that ended the ceremony was the exact song I wanted for our fist dance. I was livid! I was trying so hard not to cry.
I really did not want to be at this wedding to begin with, and that just sent me over the edge!
My FI's friend's wife consoled me and i felt a little better.
@NicLoop - that's a hilarious freudian slip you had (or maybe it was intentional)
"Anyways the bridesmaids whore"
@bviq, haha! no i really did not mean that! her MOH was her mentally challenged sister, very sweet, and the rest were just "honorary" BMs and were told to wear that color. so no i did not mean that but that is funny!
IrishbyMarriage you crack me up!! I have caleld of my wedding twice because i feel like FH does not want to help nor does anyone really. I feel i have to drag people but they offer all the time but when it comes down to it im flying solo.
@sulaii211 - Ty Lol but sooo embarrassing - hindsight is even better than 20/20
@Jizes318 - I know how you feel... I am constantly telling FH "I'm planning our wedding while you watch a movie, what's wrong here" Yet... when he commendeers the laptop and starts looking at flowers I get mad... wait.. flowers? I'm in charge of that... the return comment was "Kris, you SAY you want me to be involved in the planning, but secretly, you'd love to just get it done yourself so you get it the way you want - your mom is right - you do not work well with others.. but I love you anyways"
As for dragging feet - all over it... two of my bridesmaids dont figure they should think about the wedding until September of next yr... but thankfully my MOH is on board.
Thank goodness that man likes crazy... or else I would be in trouble
Well, so far I've had...
- the "OMG YOU RUINED EVERYTHING BY MAKING ME LOOK AT MULITPLE LOCATIONS INSTEAD OF JUST BOOKING THE FIRST ONE I LIKED AND NOW ITS BOOKED AND OUR DAY IS RUINED" freak out
- the "OMG WHAT INVITATIONS DO I ORDER I WANT TO BE CLASSY AND FUN AND WHAT ABOUT REGISTERING I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE A WEDDING WEBSITE SINCE WHEN" episode
and, finally...
- the "I. HATE. FLOWERS." tantrum.
All in all, pretty productive for only being engaged two months.
Thank goodness my fiance has the patience of a saint...
Oh gosh I can really relate to this post! Aside from crying over just about anything (mind you there are other family matters involved but it's one of the straws that's breaking the camel's back!), I had a total blow up at my FMIL on Sunday. But I will say, it was much deserved. She has been unsupportive from the get go. Upon telling her of our plans over dinner to get married, she actually said she didn't see why she had to go bc it was in NY instead of Seville, Spain (where we and she lives). And she NEVER congratulated us! It's been a constant struggle and a lot of secret tears on my end. The good thing about the blow up, is that many important issues were put out on the table AND I bit my tongue and said things as nicely as I could. My FI actually told me he was proud of me for the way that I handled the situation! And she did START the blow up to begin with! She complained that I didn't tell her that I bought a dress nor invited her to go with me to the seamstress to fix it. I told her, how can I ask someone who is unhappy about the wedding and generally unsupportive to go with me? I told her it would be like knowing that my FI hates dress shopping and then asking him to assist me in buying a dress. It just makes NO sense! I have realized that I need to try my damnest to include her more. Even if it's with trivial stuff. But I'll tell you, that woman has proven to me this year that I have been just in always feeling a bit of dislike towards her. Ugh!
Oh so I have another one. I live in a small town and my mom was pushing us to register somewhere. I finally decided that Macy's was the best option for what I could go to in person and what other people had around them. But when I got to the store I didn't really see anything I liked.
I started tearing up in the store and almost started crying when someone asked if they could help me with anything. I think I answered 'no there's nothing I can be helped with now' in some melodramatic voice.
I got myself out to the car before the waterworks started and called my mom in full blown sobs saying I couldn't make myself register for crap that I didn't want, it would be such a waste. Needless to say I didn't register anywhere and my mom stopped harrassing me about it too often.
@bvig - "no there's nothing I can be helped with now"
I died laughing reading that...
I don't think I have had any wedding flip outs. Well, I have flipped out at FH because he is a reluctant helper in planning, except when it costs lots of money and he's just like, why don't you make it yourself? And I say something along the lines of "I have 4 other DIY projects, why don't YOU make it." Never goes over well....
I love this thread! Lets see my freakouts......Well 1st: at my dad for trying to get a college photography student to do our wedding pics. 2nd: 2 months before the wedding and we STILL dont have food for our guests. 3: Davids Bridal is buggin me. 4: My FI not being as excited when I find a good deal as I am. 5: My crazy Aunt requesting on my bridal shower invites that people give money not gifts. 6: My aunt also requesting her sever ADHD, terrible, 3 year old demon like child greet our guests and pass out bubbles. 7: The farmers almanac is predicting "Gale force winds, stormy weather on my wedding day......OH IT JUST GOES ON AND ON!!!!! I'm pretty sure by the wedding day I will be on some sort of meds...
Our biggest freakout has been about tents. As in tents you camp in.
We're getting married in my hometown, which has NO accommodations. We're rented out every cottage in town, but that basically covers FIs family. My family either lives there, or has places to stay. My parents have offered up their lawn to anyone who would like to tent. It's common around here because the closest hotel is 60 minutes away, and we all like to drink and have a good time!
The problem is that we are having our ceremony on my parents lawn. I just casually mentioned to FI one night that people were going to have to set up their tents between the reception and dance (reception is in a field beside my parents house). FI FREAKED at me, saying we couldn't tell people when they could and couldn't set up their tents, and that people would need a place to get changed before the ceremony, so they would need to set tents up before.
SO I freaked right back at him, telling him that I wasn't having tents ruin our ceremony or be in the backgrounds of our pictures (please say you're on my side for that one!). He didn't see the problem in it.
We finally "compromised" on telling people they can tent at my parents for free, but if they choose to do so they will have to wait to set up their tents after the reception...which was what I was saying all along!
Does it count as an inappropriate freakout if it happens because FI is being stupid?
The only thing I'm embarrased about is interaction with vendors. I unsuccessfully tried to negotiate price with a couple that I ended up booking anyway. It just feels a little awkward now.
I also sent a long strong worded email to Priscilla of Boston customer service when I was made to believe my dress was never ordered and might not arrive on time. Instead of checking on it for me and calming me down, they forwarded my email to the store manager, who I had been dealing with. That was embarassing. I immediately emailed the customer service person back and flipped out, saying that was totally uncalled for and the manager WAS the person who made me think my dress was never ordered!
i just want to say that i love this thread. i think i had some sort of episode of demanding that my mom stop mentioning the wedding to her dozens of relatives in korea, when, um, my mom is paying for the majority of the wedding. i'm an ingrate.
I'm new, have been skulking in the background reading posts for days and I couldn't resist on this one, even though it's not new.
The worst thing I've said is, when discussing who is going to perform our ceremony (we're getting married in the middle of sheep season, and our pastor told us he won't be available!), my dad volunteered to marry us, and I snapped at him, "I don't WANT you to marry us!"
I think I hurt his feelings
Haven't had too many...just one memorable evening where, after a marathon weekend of planning (which consisted mostly of me following my mother around speechless while she plopped down deposits on vendors I wasn't even sure I liked because they were "nice") I got a call from her saying she'd booked us a hair/makeup person for the morning-of. When I looked her up, this lady's style was SOOOO not at all what I had in mind -- big, huge, 90's prom hair, and blue makeup.
I just sat on my fiance's bed and sobbed until he consoled me.
I'm still embarrassed by it, especially after calling the woman and getting a far more accurate picture of her services.
The most inappropriate thing? Wow, there have been several moments where I have looked back after and said "omg I can't believe I said that". I didn't believe people when they said how much stress planning a wedding was, now I know!
I think the only big freakouts we had was me yelling at FI for not having an opinion on anything and I had a majoy crying freakout over my wedding party and me being sure that I wouldn't get a bridal shower and all kinds of stuff. I haven't really screamed at anyone though, but mostly because that's just not my style.
I felt like a bridezilla when I was looking at wedding bands. The jeweler was going to charge what I thought was an outrageous sum to do what I wanted, so he was showing me designs from catalogs instead of doing something custom. I was like, "NO, those look like men's rings." "No, I can't STAND two-tone." Then I thought to myself, wow, I'm usually sooo laid back and friendly. So I told the guy I had to go, I'd think about it, thanks so much, and got out of there.
The other morning I was fine but had wedding stuff on the brain. Then FI was asking me about printing out something wedding-related (the photog contract maybe?) I told him the printer wasn't working. And my laptop wasn't working. And my desktop wasn't working. And he kept asking me computer questions because that's his department and I said "I DON'T KNOW I HAVEN'T HAD TIME TO EVEN THINK ABOUT IT AND I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT BECAUSE ALL THIS WEDDING STUFF I'VE BEEN DOING IS A PRIORITY AND I CAN'T EVEN DEAL WITH ANYTHING ELSE" then I walked out of the apartment to go to work and tripped and fell down a flight of steps. He helped me up and hugged me and made sure I didn't rip my pants. What a hot mess.
Later that night, HE brought up wedding planning stuff but prefaced it with, "I know you don't want to talk about the wedding, but..." He was afraid that his helping would stress me out. LOL.
My biggest freak outs were before I got engaged, lol. I was a trainwreck waiting for that ring...
But since then, probably the biggest one was when I spazzed on my mom and yelled "SAY HAPPY THINGS ABOUT MY WEDDING, OR BE QUIET!"
The good news is...it worked! She even kept her mouth shut when I bought a $6000 dress. (She had originally said I was a "diva" for looking at $3000 dresses...lol!) It was my money and I got the dress I wanted. She just couldn't help judging me for spending a lot on something I would wear for one day only.
I sent out a mass text to several of the people in my wedding....my aunt, my fmil, my fiance, the best man, the maid of honor, and two bridesmaids and said they could wear whatever they want and do whatever they wanted because I'm not trying to be controlling. LOL Everyone has really been stressing me out.
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