(Closed) What’s tougher: Being a wife or being a mom?

posted 8 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: What's tougher?
    Being a wife! : (3 votes)
    19 %
    Being a mom! : (13 votes)
    81 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2324 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2018

    Being mom takes a lot of work and it’s tiring, but making a relationship and partnership work with another adult who is set in their ways and knows what they want and need is a lot harder. My 5 year old might throw a tantrum or two and I have to shuttle her around all the time, but being a good wife, good partner AND getting what I need and want from my husband takes a lot more work and luck. 🙂 We have a great relationship, but it takes work. My daughter has loved me from the day she was born and I have loved her since I found out she was she.

    Post # 5
    Member
    7054 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Well I’ve been a single mom and I’ve also been a married wife and mom (when I was of course married).  Being a mom is much harder.  Especially if you do it all like I do.

    Heck when i was married I felt it was double duty work.  My x didn’t contribute to parenting very much. 

    But with a child as they get older and they have more activities to do, and are more and more independent, parenting is a bit more difficult imho.  My son just turned 11.  

    Post # 6
    Member
    2324 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2018

    @sjbee~ Thanks! She’s a doll. I should say that being a mom isn’t easy by any means, but it certainly comes more naturally to me then being a wife! 🙂 Maybe I just have an easy child? She does talk a ton, just like her mama!

    Post # 8
    Member
    2641 posts
    Sugar bee

    Hands down, I think being a mom is more difficult.  I think it changes your life way more than geting married.  Of course that probably depends on your lifestyle, especially before these life changes.  But for me, getting married wasn’t a huge stretch, compared to becoming a mom.

    If you are having a difficult time with your spouse, you can take time off to cool down.  You can (try to) talk rationally, recognize and forgive each others short comings, etc.  As a parent, you have less wiggle room to just forgive short comings.  You simply haveto be better.  Impatience, or laziness, just doesn’t cut it as a parent, and has a much deeper impact on your children than spouse.  You are the adult in the relationship.  So it basically all rests on you.  In order for them (children) to do their jobs correctly (ie. being kind, studying hard, cleaning up their rooms), you need to be on top of your game.  it’s hard to do all the time.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3285 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2009

    I voted ‘mom’ under the assumption of my own situation of (soon) being a wife.  As a mom, you are responsible for the well-being of individuals that need help and guidance in many ways. ( I’d like to assume that a husband can take care of himself well enough, lol)

    Of course, after voting, I didn’t even think of the many situations in which many moms are alone (single moms) which of course is even harder! 

    So…yeah…as a mom and a wife, you’d be juggling a lot…but we should be so lucky to have the support of a husband! 

    Post # 10
    Member
    5399 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Great question!  I’m not a mom, so it’s hard to answer this question.  I would assume being a mom is harder, but I guess I’ll have a better answer when I become one!

    Post # 11
    Member
    2144 posts
    Buzzing bee

    If I had to guess, I’d say being a mom. So far, this being a wife business is pretty easy stuff :p I’m totally loving it. We’ve been living together over a year now (I moved in a year before we got married) and we haven’t had any HUGE problems. Yeah, we don’t get along all of the time, and we each can get on each other’s nerves, but at the end of the day, we both love each other. I know we work at our relationship, it just doesn’t feel like work. Being a mom on the other hand… I love kids and cannot wait until we start (serious baby fever over here), but I just don’t think it;ll be easy! At least if I’m cranky hubby knows its PMS, but kids wont. They’ll also “bother” me in the morning, and Im not much of a morning person. Hubby knows to just mostly leave me alone lol

    Post # 12
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I’m going to say “mom” even though I haven’t been there yet, but only because you STILL have to be a wife! ha! Laughing

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