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Since we knew we weren't having a very long engagement, we got to planning right away. We set our date, booked venues, and quickly ordered STD's so we could try to get them out with our Christmas cards. In retrospect, I wish that we had thought out our guest list a little more thoroughly and maybe waited with the STD's. Now I'm wishing we could trim our guest list a little because the count is more than I really wanted, but we are now obligated to invite everyone. In the end, it wouldn't have been a huge difference anyway, but it would've been nice to have the option. Oh well! Now we will celebrate with even more friends and family! :)
Oh ... and I also want to add that I, by nature, second guess EVERY decision I make. So there are many aspects of our wedding that I have thought I regretted at some point, and then change my mind again .... and then again ... and .... you get the point. It seems every time I make a decision, I find something "better," or a different way I could've done something, and then I start to regret my decision. I know in the end everything will be fine and I will have a beautiful day, but it's so hard not to have regrets!!!
Oh I so agree with you on the negotiating! I overpaid for flowers and cupcakes...now I will try negotiating with the video/photo people.
Beachbride, you sound like me! I too second guess EVERYTHING!! The thing I currently am most regretting are bridesmaid dresses. One of my BM was putting the pressure on to get them ordered "in time" and I was getting so many different opinions from the girls what they liked/didn't, that finally I just settled on a dress. It's an ok dress, I just wish I would have taken more time to look into them and picked a dress I really loved, not just a random one b/c I was so frustrated with dress shopping!
I wish I had chosen to do simpler invitations. I'm in the middle of assembling them, and I hate it.
hey date twin!
i think more of my planning regret is around the DIY projects that i signed up for... and getting lazy toward the end of it!
it's not much that i need to get done, but i definitely should have finished this up way before now, because i'm going to be in law school at night, working during the day, and studying on the wknd! AHHH.
(also regretting letting FI take charge of ANY of it! lol, he still has to book the tux, limo, and honeymoon! :P)
I regret not figuring out guest transportation earlier because we are scrambling right now and I already put it on the website that it would be available. Eek!
i regret not doing my wedding at disney. the first idea i wanted to go to disney and have a very intimate wedding with the parents and the best men and moh. thats it. and have fun. but noooo. my fi wanted the traditional wedding affair.
Mine, so far (wedding in 23 days... might change then!) is the number of attendants... I love everyone we included... but it seems the wedding party is MUCH too big for our wedding with <40 guests. I wish I could go back and just have maid & man of honor and thats it. But, as it is, I have 3 attendants and so does the FI... and that makes up about 1/5 of everyone who will be at the wedding!
Not keeping the budget in check better. We're definitely going over and I don't like it one bit. Also, I wish I would have spent less on my dress I know I could have found something out there for less than $500, but I was so wrapped up in being engaged that I HAD to have a dress.
All you newly engaged bees - don't shop for your dress so early like I did!!!
Date twins! :)
I regret buying shoes 3 times :( I had a hard time with this and in the end will be wearing a pair from my own closet that were there all along. I also regret not going with my gut and keeping invitation costs lower. I knew from the outset they weren't that important to me and I let my Mom and planner stress me out about what was "proper". Should've done Paperless Post for at least the STDs!! Now I'm a month or three behind sending them out :(
I am definately in agreement with the not negotiating. I'm sure I'm paying too much for flowers, mostly because I'm too shy to negotiate (embarrassed to say). BUT, I try not to feel too guilty cause I think we're saving on photography (a friend of a friend is giving us a sizable discount), so all in all I'm hoping it evens out. Still, I wish I would've pushed it before signing anything...........
Taken more time to find a dress instead of jumping for one because it was good enough and the price was right (but at the time, my fear was losing the dress since it was the last one they had in my size...).
And jumping in the photographer before exploring options. Though we hired a good photographer, these amazing photographers who went to my friends wedding in Greece turned out to be about the same price as the local one in Rio, incuding travel costs, and their package included an extra day of shooting :(
By the time I found that out, my mom had already put down the deposit on the local photographer. I wish I had taken some time to research and ask questions first, instead of just assuming they'd cost more.
(I totally recommend them if you're looking for a destination wedding photographer, or you're local to them in Montana: http://www.gatheringlightphoto.com/ -- my friends, Ken & Mary Ellen, are part of their gallery pics.)
Not having more of a vision of how I wanted things.. I kinda went blindly though things going I like that, I like this and trying to pull it all together? now im left trying to sort it all out and make sure the look is flowing. Which is not a hard task but its a pain in the whatsit. I needed to sit down more and wish I aimed for an overall look. Shouldve done that from the start.
Letting myself get debilitatingly stressed in the early stages of our engagment and planning. I was miserable for the first month, not enjoying the time at all and was so upset I couldnt plan for crap! Also that was before I found the Hive, so there you go!
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With my wedding 5 months away, I've had time to take stock of some of the "mistakes" I've made along the way. I'm not beating myself up over it, because hindsight is always 20/20, but I thought it might be helpful for the newly engageds to have some perspective and advice from those of us who are a little farther along in the planning process.
My biggest planning regret, hands down, is NOT negotiating prices with vendors. I think I was too embarassed/nervous to ask them to work with me on prices, so I just paid face value for everything. Looking back, I bet I could have shaved off about $1500 if I had clipped off a little here and there with different vendors.
What are your biggest planning regrets?