What's your opinion on a charity donation on behalf of guests as a "favor"?

posted 2 years ago in Favors
  • poll: Donation or favor?
    I would want a physical favor to take home : (17 votes)
    30 %
    I think a donation on my behalf is awesome! : (39 votes)
    70 %
  • Post # 2
    613 posts
    Busy bee

    Peaceoutboyscout:  I have been to 3 wedding were a charitable donation was made in lieu of favors and had no problem with it, in fact I most of the time prefer it. FI and I are also planning on making a donation we have lost all but one grandmother and all were taken by cancer. So we are making a donation in their honor.

    Post # 3
    333 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    Peaceoutboyscout:  I’m not opposed to a charitable donation, although many people are.  You are basically giving their personal information to an organization that they may not support, which I can see would make people uncomfortable.

    Cancer is something that’s touched many people’s lives–however, I’d maybe reconsider ACS.  It’s pretty universally known for using a good chunk of donations to pay salaries and overhead as opposed to doing cancer-related research. 

    Post # 4
    6631 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011


    Peaceoutboyscout:  Honestly I rather not know about it due to if it isn’t a charity I support. I would not want to be assoicated with that charity.   I rather just not hear about it and favors are not going to be missed. 

    Post # 5
    864 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    Peaceoutboyscout:  i think if you do it like, taking the money you would have spent on favors and making a lump sum donation to that charity (in the name of the friends and family of either Peaceoutboyscout and DH, or friends and family of Deceased Relatives), then i think it’s great especially since it’s someone so close to you that inspired this. i would have a problem with it if it included my contact information in any way because although the cause is good, being telemarketed by these organizations for months after the fact is lame.

    the only time i would have an issue with it in general, would be if you were donating something in my name to a charity that had views that i did not share. so if you donated in my name to like…the southern baptist association, i’d have an issue with it. things like that. i have no problem with those charities existing as it is their right to hold their beliefs, but i don’t wish to support them.

    but in your case, yes i think it would be a great idea. plus you’re not left with 50 extra drink huggies with your wedding date on them because everyone forgot to take one home. 🙂

    Post # 6
    213 posts
    Helper bee

    love this idea!! seriously! favors can be cute but they’re never anything people really keep forever. 

    Post # 7
    9856 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Peaceoutboyscout:  To me, sometimes it rubs me the wrong way – usually if they’re more controversial charities (like PETA as an example).

    In your case, making a donation to a charity that is near and dear for a reason that your guests will understand – love it.


    Post # 8
    679 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I don’t like it.

    First, I already donate to several charities of my choice for personal reasons.

    Second, I’ve been to a few weddings where the couple donated to charity instead of favors.  They had a sign “announcing” it and it totally bothered me, like they were looking for the kudos.  Look at us, we’re such good people that we donated!  Donations do not need to be announced.

    Third, favors aren’t necessary at all.  In fact, I think most are a waste of money and I don’t take them.  Sorry.

    I would much rather the couple spend the money that they would spend on favors on the actual reception itself.

    Post # 9
    1262 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2015 - Mount Hermon

    Peaceoutboyscout:  neither choice in your poll. I agree with 


    Just skip the favors. I know it doesn’t seem like anyone could be offended by ACS, but you never know. 

    Some people are different and love the physical favour, like my FI. We’ve had several arguments about it. I hate favors, he loves the physical reminder. He’s also a pack rat. 

    Post # 10
    1202 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I think it’d be a fantastic idea for couples to forgo a traditional registry and set up a charity registry with different options.

    Post # 11
    2565 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    If you want to donate to a charity, just donate to the charity.  No need to make a show of it at your wedding “I have done you the favour of donating to this charity for you!”

    Post # 12
    42082 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    A donation to a charity is not a favor. It is a way of spending your money in lieu of spending it on a favor.

    I am totally ok with a couple deciding that a donation to a charity is a better use of their money than most cheesy favors.Just don’t tell me about it.

    I know there will be Bees who think that having cards or signs informing the guests is a great idea because it raises awareness of the cause. If the cause is truly important to you, champion it at other times and make regular donations.

    Having a sign telling me that you gave money always comes off to me as bragging. I don’t tell you when I make charitable donations. You don’t normally tell me when you do. Why the need to tell everyone at your wedding?

    You do not need to explain the absence of favors. I know there are some cultures where favors are expected, but for most of us they have only appeared in the last few years and most of them are junk. If you don’t want a favor, don’t have one. If you want to make a donation, do so. Just keep it to yourself.

    Post # 13
    988 posts
    Busy bee


    Peaceoutboyscout:  It’s not that I want a physical favor to bring home with me (unless it’s edible!), but I agree with PP saying that posting a sign at the reception that basically says, “look how great we are…we donated an unspecified amount to a charity!” isn’t exactly a great option. I’ve been to a wedding that did that and our response was just, “good for you, I guess?”

    If you don’t want to do favors, don’t do favors. If you want to make a donation, make a donation. I doubt any of your guests will care.

    Post # 14
    716 posts
    Busy bee

    My opinion can be summarized in a single word, whatever.  Do it, don’t do it, do it and don’t announce it, I don’t care.

    Post # 15
    668 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    Skip the favors, make the donation, and leave your wedding guests out of the charity aspect altogether.

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