Post # 1
Spin-off type post. Just wondering what you think your advice style is on the bee and why.
I tend to lean towards tough love. I try to put myself in the persons shoes and think what I would have done and need to hear. I can’t have people placating me because it doesn’t help. I like the blunt “wake up bee you’re acting crazy” responses because I’d need them.
What style do you think you are? (Snarky, comical, etiquette queen, nurturing… other?)
Post # 3
Blunt, but at the same time tiptoes a bit b/c I’ve been chewed out for not phrasing things “just so” in the past by other angry bees, lol.
Post # 4
It completely depends on the post, in my opinion. If the poster has an issue that they know they are overreacting about and are looking for ways to feel better, I’m usually nicer.
If the poster admits fault in themselves, I’m pretty nice.
I save the tough love for the posters that can’t see any fault in themselves, or who are acting entitled etc. The more obnoxious the poster, the more tough love/snarky I get.
I have noticed that a lot of information comes in the follow ups though, so you might think you have a solid opinion of op, but then it completely changes with some follow ups. One recent op mentioned she had a past of being unfaithful on her fiance, and I was like… well, duh he feels disrespected, cheating will make someone feel that way. She eventually said that the unfaithfulness was being out late with friends, not cheating. So that threw me for a loop.
Post # 5
slomotion : I love your responses. 🍿😏
skunktastic : Interesting rationale!!
Post # 6
Sansa85 : Well said!! Your style comes across! I feel like you hold true to who you are.
I feel like I know some of the bees pretty well by now.
Post # 7
I find myself agreeing with your angry bee responses, I think I’m a closet angry bee 😉
Post # 8
Im blunt. Sometimes I feel bad for being harsh but I try to just call it like I see it while still being kind. (sorry if I havent been kind to some of you bees!)
Post # 9
9 times out of 10 I try to understand where the bee is coming from because I’ve had “a lot of feelings” my whole life and my German mother is very “tough love”. Tough love & being told that I’m overreacting has never helped me. I think it only helps a very specific personality type. For most others I think it just makes things worse- nobody reacts well when they don’t feel understood. Also I really believe that many people already know where they are wrong- they don’t need it highlighted.
I try to only give tough love if somebody openly asks for it or if are about to do something stupid.
Regarding cheating or any type of emotional abuse, however, I am the angriest bee. Dump your boyfriend. Leave your husband. Cancel the wedding. Nobody deserves to put up with nonsense & I genuinely hate hearing about women being taken advantage of. Even if I don’t know them.
Post # 10
Honest and nice at the same time. I’m a nice person, but I will give my honest opinion.
Post # 11
somathemagical : Honest ! people come to the bee because they want to hear what their friends or family might be to afraid or too nice to say … you come here for the truth then be ready to hear it ! i love all my angry bees my nice bees everyone taking time to reply i love it allll
Post # 12
I often think about writing “get over it” with some of the more asinine posts. Due to this not being constructive, and, mostly, due to the website working terribly with my cell I often just don’t post at all.
Post # 13
I like to be honest but respectful even if I’m thinking WTF inside. Some people (not just here, but behind any keyboard) can be just down right ugly. I just don’t understand that approach. We are all humans with feelings and you should treat and approach people with kindness and respect.
Post # 14
I try to remember that if someone is posting a problem on WB, it’s probably because they’ve found no one IRL who’s understanding about it, so even if I think they’re off the wall I usually tone down my response. I’ve gone online for a “sanity check” enough times… always after trying to talk to family and friends and being met with zero understanding, indifference, or even worse.
Post # 15
I think I’m a cross between tough love and nurturing… I am a nurse so I have kind of a sliding scale approach based on the person and situation. Sometimes I’m more gentle, others I’m straight up and very direct, but I try to never be cold or unfeeling. And I never think it’s fair to discount someones feelings or the seriousness of their situation *to them*. Sometimes I think posts on here are ridiculous, but maybe it means a lot to that person.
However, if someone says something sarcastic, unnecessary, or snarky in any way, my compassion takes the back seat and I don’t hesitate to clap back. haha