When an Old "Friend" Comes Knocking

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Should I contact her back?
    Yes, cause it's the past : (3 votes)
    9 %
    No, she tried to ruin the happiest thing you have in life : (16 votes)
    48 %
    Maybe, but with extreme caution : (14 votes)
    42 %
  • Post # 3
    1719 posts
    Bumble bee

    Do you want to talk to her? If you do, respond. If you don’t, ignore the message.

    I know that seems obvious, but that’s really all you need to consider. 

    Post # 4
    6700 posts
    Bee Keeper

    People can change.  Perhaps she regrets what she did and is looking to make amends.  I think it’s possible to open the door to some kind of communication as long as you are very cautious. There is no obligation to take the relationship anywhere at all, now or ever, so I wouldn’t worry returning about a FB message.  If someone is making the effort to reach out, I’d usually at least give them the courtesy of a reply and to  hear them out.

    Post # 5
    851 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013 - The front lawn of our church

    @Missmollyblue:  Could be that she saw pictures, was reminded of all the good times and what a good friend you were to her, and decided to get over the bad stuff that went on. 

    I think you should contact her back and be nice. You don’t have to be BFFs with her again, but you can be casual friends.

    Post # 6
    2562 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    So wait, you want this woman back in your life when she worked so hard to destroy your happiness at some point?

    I wouldn’t even bother with her.

    Post # 7
    4965 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @Missmollyblue:  How long ago was this? If it happened when you were in high school, I do honestly think that people can change. You are so young and immature at that time that maybe now that she is an adult, she has changed and wants to apologize. I would be cautious though. The only way to find out is to respond and hear what she has to say.

    Post # 8
    319 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I’ve reached out to old friends that have drifted (no real drama) over the years, and I can honestly say that 4 out of 5 times it wasn’t worth it. We grew so much apart, in different directions- maybe I was expecting that fun *sparkle* again, but it wasn’t there. Hanging out&chatting again wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t like old times and I was disappointed. With age my ‘friends’ grew suprisingly judgemental and had more baggage, they weren’t happy with their lives and it showed, yet they were self-centered and weren’t too interested in my life lol it was weird.

    If you do talk to her, better lower you expectations BIG-time! :-/ and hopefully she’ll suprise you 🙂

    Post # 11
    906 posts
    Busy bee

    I had a friend who I was very close to and we had a falling out but I am friends with her again but just on a casual friend level. 

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