- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
Anyone else feeling intense pressure to put on a super cheap wedding that looks as beautiful and classy as a bigger budget wedding?
I’m feeling exhausted trying to find creative, inventive alternatives to make our wedding look lovely, but on a very limited budget, and with very limited support and pitch in from others. It’s consuming my non-work life.
I just need to vent for a minute:(. I am paying for most of the wedding myself while my fiance works off debt-that’s cool. My venue is exhausting me. Yes, it’s free on the surface. It even has an attractive look, and nice tables and chairs. But everything else has to be outsourced or DIY- caterer, bartender, cleaners, coordinator, setup, tear down, dishes, linen, decorating, switching from dinner to dancing in the same space….it is too much for me. I’ve spent hours daily for weeks trying to make a nice looking, pleasant reception work in this setting, and mostly, those ideas have fallen through or prove to hardly save money at all in the end. I can’t think of many people who would be available or willing to help us more-my maids are awesome but all live away, and the mothers are disinterested, so it feels like it’s all on my shoulders alone to produce an amazing, smoothly functioning reception out of next to nothing.
There is another venue I am looking at that is less beautiful, and superficially more expensive. It’s $2800 for 80 people, but includes catering, linens, dishes, podium/equipment, parking, and basic decorating. Similar cash bar (the norm here). Nothing creative or fancy, just the everyday fare. It is about $300 more expensive when tallying up the total costs, and does not involve any extra work-they do it all.
I want to do this instead. But I’m getting flack from family, friends, even my fiance, that “it’s overspending on a typical, boring, hotel-catered reception”. My fiance is the type who is all gung ho about an idea, but leaves it to the last second and is always surprised when it doesn’t work or falls through. Good intentions, bad motivation, you know?
It’s wonderful when people can DIY so many parts of the wedding with friends, families, and discount connections. It’s wonderful when family and friends can pitch in hours of support or help, or offer to make a backyard wedding work, or flower arrangements work, or decorating work. I WANT affordable solutions within a small budget. I am not trying to be indulgent (ok, I am trying to be lazier). I understand that my lack of creativity and determination will result in a more expensive wedding.
Sometimes brides don’t have connections or active support, as well as little outside financial help. Sometimes family and friends are too busy or unmotivated to help you put the DIY plan into place or offer their time or talents. Sometimes work and home demands make the budget wedding ideas overwhelming. Sometimes it’s easier to just go with something straightforward, and yes, probably marked up in price.
Another friend also scoffed that I purchased a wedding dress from our local bridal store instead of something online for cheaper. I’m a gal that suffers slightly from shorty-stumpy-hippy-itis. Online stuff causes problems. I shelled out $810 (plus tax)- it fits as it should, was a wonderful experience, and I feel awesome in it-no alterations needed. I feel guilty.
Anyone else struggling with budget bride frustrations? :(.