When did this become acceptable?

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Never.

Post # 4
Member
844 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

In this situation, not appropriate. You shouldn’t expect much less ask for gifts for something like a renewal. She’s already had her wedding.

I’ll admit that in my particular social circle it is completely normal to add something like that onto the bottom of a wedding invitation, and I can’t think of a single person who would be offended by that in my family/friends circle. I think that, like other things like cash bars, much of it is entirely down to your culture.

But, you’re right, in this situation? Not okay.

Post # 5
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I have seen it done numerous times in my family on shower invitations and every time I find it appaling. I don’t know how people think this is acceptable. I intentionally give a small gift and absolutely refuse to give money when I see this done.

Post # 7
Member
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Pretty tacky thing to do if you ask me. I wouldn’t want to go either.

Post # 9
Member
4031 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

PositiveThinking:  So essentially this seems less like a vow reneweal and more like a FOURTH (Jeez!) wedding. I know some cultures do focus more on monetary gifts as opposed to other forms and that is fine. But your fourth wedding…wtf? Definitely attention and money-grabbing. 

ETA: Oh and hell no to $400 for a new gown. Good for your cousin for not participating. Ridiculous. 

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 5 months ago by  KatiePi.
Post # 10
Member
2264 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

PositiveThinking:  That’s grey area for me. Basically, the polite thing to do is to ask your bridesmaids (individually and privately) what their budget is, and to find a dress that fits that budget. If all of the BMs privately said that they had a $400 dress budget, then I see no issue. If the BMs all mentioned a $200 budget and the bride wants $400 dresses, she should be prepared to pay the difference. 

Post # 13
Member
2264 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

PositiveThinking:  oh I was speaking in general in terms of weddings. Yeah, no way would I pay for a dress for a vow renewal. Or if I did purely out of love for the couple, I certainly wouldn’t spend $400!!

Post # 13
Member
4031 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

PositiveThinking:  To me I can clearly see why yours is a vow renewal but may be similar to a wedding. Did you elope (if so, where? I love hearing about elopements). Goodness…and people wonder why some don’t take marriage seriously. 

Post # 15
Member
6525 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

PositiveThinking:  ::sigh:: …speechless….

What is wrong with people today!?!

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