Post # 1
Hello, Bees! 🙂 I have been a long time lurker, but decided to start posting.
I guess this post has been created out of curiosity 🙂 So, when was the first time you and your SO got into an argument? Was it your first date? Two months into your relationship? You still haven’t argued at all? What, in your opinion, is the average time period when couples actually might start arguing?
Thank you to all of you who might share!
Post # 3
H and I are pros at arguing. We are that couple that is always bickering! We bickered from the beginning, but probably had our first big “fight” 6 or so months into the relationship. We dated in high school, so it was probably a fight about him not calling me after baseball practice haha
Post # 4
@nolana: Hmmmm I would have to say about 2 months in maybe? At this point we had known each other for about 5 months.
Post # 5
This is going to sound awful but one of our worst fights (not flat out screaming but me being a gigantic passive aggressive b!tch and him being a hands off unemotional dude) happened the day after we started dating. (Actually it could have even been before we started dating…it was right there)
It involved another girl (nothing hinky just she was trying to get with him at the same time we were starting to move towards a relationship.) He ended up telling me later that he debated with himself whether I was even worth the trouble.
Almost four years in and we rarely fight. We bicker sometimes and occassionally I’ll get a bit passive aggressive and he’ll call me on it but perhaps like 5 big fights in total.
Post # 6
- Wedding: May 2015 - Aloft Hotel
Me and my FI had our first fight about 4 months in and loved it so much we haven’t stopped since! Haha not really…but unfortunately we’re pros at fighting. Big blow out don’t happen often, but we have lots of those “Why did you say that?”/”You are so stubborn!”/”Why are you making things difficult?!” little 15 minutes bitch sessions.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!
I think it was around 6 months into our relationship. I was away at college and he’d been driving down (4 hours) on the weekends to see me. He was also a student living on his own (not in a dorm like me which was factored into my tuition) so he was also working part time. He was literally busting his ass and then traveling every chance he got to see me. I was being needy and greedy about how we should go on more dates, ect ect, not realizing, DUH we are both broke ass college students. After he told me how I was acting, I quickly realized the amount of sacrifices he makes for me.
Post # 8
About 3 months into our relationship. We were living two hours apart and didn’t get to spend that much time together when we did see each other. He and his ex went to same school, and since she was the only person up there he knew for a long time, they used to hang out a lot. After we started datingI found out she kept trying to get him to sleep with her and trash talking me (I’ve known his ex since we were in the first grade). I also found out she thought that she would be invited to ride with him to come see me after I had surgery… I wasn’t exactly thrilled about this. I was already bummed out that he wasn’t going to be able to come see me on our usual days and I couldn’t see him because it had snowed, the roads were icy and lower Alabama doesn’t know how to deal with snow. A few days later, he and some of his friends had a party because he was moving and the ex was there. While I was on the phone with him, she came into his place and asked if she could sleep at his place, in his bed. I kind of lost it. He said she was drunk and didn’t know what she was saying, I said she knew damn well what she was saying and I was tired of her popping up and trying to screw up our relationship.
FH hadn’t been spending much time with her at all by this point, save for the classes they had together, since she started trying to get him to sleep with her, but it really pissed me off that she came into his place, knowing he was on the phone with me, and then asked if she could sleep over, in his bed.
He moved two days after that incident, and we haven’t argued about much else since then.
Post # 9
a couple of months into the relationship
Post # 10
It took us 4 years to have the “incident” as I call it. One day, he was saying how he was frustrated he never had any money in savings, so I asked why he just bought himself a motorcycle then. He got sooo mad and stormed out of the apartment. I escalated the drama by trying to grab his keys from his hand and then yelling out the window after him. He spent the night at his office and we made up the next day.
I really thought I was going to die. I called in sick for work and everything. This happened in 2010 and we haven’t had a fight since then. I’m much more careful about what I say lol.
Post # 11
We are always bickering and having little spats. Our first little spat was about a month into our relationship because he was telling me how in love with me he was, but I told him that he shouldn’t be so sure. He was so mad, but now he claims that we had been dating for two years when we had this argument, but we for sure hadn’t! LOL We really didn’t get into a real fight until about 3 years into our relationship.
Post # 12
The Valentine’s Day after we started dating (we’d been together 8 months, and were living together).
I don’t know what we were talking about, but I said “Like I would never stand for it if you had a picture of an ex in the bedroom.”
And DH replied “But I do have a picture of an ex in the bedroom.”
It was our first arguement, and our second biggest one ever!
Post # 13
I can’t remember our first normal fight…I was in a really good place when we started dating and was able to go with the flow for a while. It was probably a few months into our relationship when he wasn’t doing well in his classes. We had a lot of issues along those lines for a while before I was able to realize that it was his life and I needed to support him instead of attack him.
Our first screaming and crying match was maybe about 8 or 9 months in. Our first “shit we might break up” fight was the night before our first anniversary funnily enough. We’ve gotten a lot better at fighting these days and they are more like heated discussions than fights.
Post # 14
Thank you everyone for the answers! It’s been very fun to read so far! 🙂
@FEDORAble – wow! I’m happy that everything turned out to be good between you two and that he chose to stick with you! 🙂
@BrandNewBride – wow again! I haven’t seen any pictures of my SO’s exes, but we would definitely have a “talk” if he ever decided to put a picture up in our bedroom!
Post # 15
@nolana: Welcome to the Hive!
DH and I had our first argument years before we started dating and the first day we met. He’s a union lib and I’m a cons so it was over politics and we got so heated the bar almost asked us to leave. It wasn’t the only time thats happened since.
Post # 16
Our first argument was 7 months after we started dating on New Year’s Eve. DH wasn’t really fond of the whole count down thing, but I always counted down with my family. It was the first year I wasn’t spending it with them and I had made up a ton of snacks for DH and me to munch on while we watched TV and waited for the countdown. Well after one or two episodes of the Twilight Zone DH went and got on his computer, and 5 minutes before midnight I called him out to the living room and he said he couldn’t come out because he was in the middle of a game (team game) but he’d be done in about 15 minutes. Well, 15 minutes would be too late and we got in to an arugment over it.
It was a really little argument, but I remember telling him that it was going to be a black spot on my memory for ever and ever, and that I would always remember ending our first year together and starting our first year together as having a horrible fight and that the memory would always bring me to tears. God, I was so dramatic. Heck, New Years has become just another little thing for us, and we always just turn to the countdown a few minutes before midnight, do our countdown, and then go back to watching our movie or TV show. I hadn’t even thought about that ‘fight’ until just now. Funny how it was so important to me back then, and now… now it’s just ridiculous!