(Closed) When did you get tired of hearing unsolicited advice?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
  • poll:
    Basically the day I started planning : (22 votes)
    51 %
    A year out : (0 votes)
    Six months out : (7 votes)
    16 %
    Right before the wedding : (2 votes)
    5 %
    Other (explain) : (5 votes)
    12 %
    I like voting in polls! : (7 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 3
    3773 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    The more you talk about it the more people think you are looking for opinions or input. At 6 months out I as hardly talking wedding talk with anyone besides those on a need to know basis. I would politley answer the question and change the subject, especially when you have 6 months left in planning you will go crazy. Keep things between you and Fiance for now and it will save you a ton of patience. 

    Post # 4
    479 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    The month before the wedding I was sooo over it all! Between what I should do or should have done! I was sick of the damn what to do in a Marriage conversation…

    Post # 5
    3626 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Thankfully, not many people gave me unsolicited advice because I tried not to talk about the wedding (that’s what these boards are for!). I’d say that’s the best way to prevent the advice.

    @ieatunicorns:  I pretty much agree with this.

    Post # 6
    1093 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Are you getting unsolicited advise or people just making conversation?

    If someone told me they’re getting married I’d probably congratulate them and ask questions. If I happen to refleck on my own wedding or something I encountered while planning I would think I’m just making conversation.

    Post # 8
    1681 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I wish people wanted to talk about my weding with me. :/ I always feel like no one cares

    Post # 9
    11172 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    To be honest I never really got a lot of advice from people unless I asked. Overall people were great at listening and asking questions without pushing.

    I think most people knew I was pretty on top of things and that most had already been taken care of so perhaps they knew their advice was pointless? Even my Mother-In-Law held back a great deal compared to my SIL and BIL’s wedding. She had LOADS to suggest for that wedding and very little for ours.

    Post # 10
    1992 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Miss Otter:  I agree… just stop talking about the aspects of the wedding really and they won’t be able to comment/offer adivice.

    I stopped talking about the wedding to people other than my parents and my guy about 4 months out because it was just getting too insane with everyone giving their 2 cents.

    I actually also stopped posting on the boards really because my mind was so cluttered and would get drawn to other things on here and my to-do list was getting longer and I just needed to FOCUS on what I already had planned with a “keep calm & carry on” mentality…

    People might think you’re being protective or secretive of your plans and get a little funny about how you’re no dishing on all the details so give light tidbits here and there if you must (I had to! I have too many nosey nellies in my life! haha)

    I started to get really vague tho and give the air that I didn’t really want to talk about it all because I wanted/needed a break and that helped people back off and not offer opinions too lol

    Post # 11
    1578 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013 - Country Club

    My FI’s aunt kept on telling me that I should have my dress custom made, because otherwise I would never ever find a dress and you know what, it should be yellow. Because she always wanted a yellow dress! 


    I mean really?!

    Post # 12
    7174 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    A friend gave me the BEST advice.  She said just SMILE, say “Thank you”, and something like:  that’s an interesting idea… or, I’ll take that into consideration… or, nothing at all…..

    I turned it into a game for myself and worked on not taking it personally (meaning, their idea was NOT about hating my idea – it was just expressing their excitement/idea!).

    Post # 13
    347 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I tried to stop talking about the wedding, and it seems as though that’s all people want to discuss with me! Every time I see people, that is ALL they ask me about! Thankfully, I’m only 8 days out so that will stop pretty soon!

    Post # 14
    39 posts
    • Wedding: May 2013

     By the day of the engagement.

    The side that isn’t paying for anything always has the ideas. Let’s just say we smile, thank them for offering the ideas, and do what we want.

    Post # 15
    220 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I consider myself very decisive, so when the opinions started (immediately after the engagement) I  was already over it!!

    Post # 16
    384 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I get tired of hearing any advice as I don’t enjoy planning or talking about the planning. But if it wasn’t for the advice of others (and doing) then NOTHING would be happening lol. Except the rings. I like rings.

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