When do you think it's acceptable for you to upgrade your ring?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
  • poll: How soon is it acceptable for you to upgrade your ring?
    It's never acceptable for me to upgrade : (91 votes)
    38 %
    It's acceptable for me to upgrade after 50 years : (3 votes)
    1 %
    It's acceptable for me to upgrade after 20 years : (9 votes)
    4 %
    It's acceptable for me to upgrade after 10 years : (72 votes)
    30 %
    It's acceptable for me to upgrade as soon as we're married : (20 votes)
    8 %
    It's acceptable for me to upgrade before we get married : (42 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2151 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I would personally never upgrade my e-ring. My SO and I are really sentimental. I couldn’t imagine getting rid of the ring or stone he proposed with. Everything about it (style, size, etc) will always remind me of the place we are in our lives now, and that is really special to me. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    552 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I didn’t realize that “upgrading” was a thing until I came to the Bee. I don’t ever plan on upgrading my ring, it has too much sentimental value to me.

    Post # 5
    Hostess
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Me and fi purchased a ring that was affordable NOW. After a year of being married, he wants to upgrade it [hopefully our financial situation will be more open].

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    6964 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @HonoraryNerd:  I’m pretty sentimental so I doubt I will ever upgrade. I’d rather get an anniversary band to stack or something. That said, I could see upgrading before you’re married if you had a very long engagement (like 5 years or more). My cousin got an upgrade for their 10th anniversary basically because they were by young and broke when they got married and were settled and doing well when they upgraded. I guess I can see that if you’re not attached to the ring. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    290 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I love my ring and can’t ever imagine I would want to upgrade but if someone really doesn’t like their ring and they have the means to upgrade then they can whenever they wish. I personally think if you have a ring and you now have some extra cash there are many other things that money could go to rather than a slightly bigger diamond but that’s just my personal opinion. Life is all about pursuing what makes you happy, so if it makes you happy go for it.

    Post # 8
    Hostess
    7630 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I don’t plan on changing my ring. However, I think it’s ok whenever both people in the relationship agree to it. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    9226 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2018

    Never. I chose the ring, FI proposed with the ring, it means a lot to me. I would never upgrade.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2125 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    My SO and I are finishing up college now, and he is making much less money now then he will later. He is going to start his PhD program next summer. I never brought up the idea of upgrading, but the store where we bought my ring did. He likes the idea of it, but we’ll see what happens when we get there. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    489 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    I’m currently mid-upgrade and my wedding isn’t for another 13 months.  It is definitely an upgrade because the new ring setting alone (just e-ring setting, not including any bands, and not including the center stone of course) costs over 5x what my original entire set cost (and the cost of the original set was in the thousands).  I think people can and should upgrade anytime they want to (as long as they can afford it).  Personally I’m upgrading because I had issues with my first setting and we can afford my dream set now (platinum/diamonds), and it’s going to be larger than my original set as well.  

    Post # 12
    Member
    10219 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Encore Bride.

    My First Marriage (circa 1980) and people were far more sentimental (practical ?) and kept their Wedding Rings for life… that is what my Mother did (Wed 1950s), and her Mother before her (Wed 1920s).

    It is only since my Generation that the Ring Industry has truly taken off.

    When I was married the first time it was just then becoming fashionable for a woman to add different rings into the mix… the 3rd Band (in an interlocking set sometimes added for a Milestone Annivesary, or the Birth of a First Baby)… An Aniversary Band… 3 Stone (Past – Present – Future)… an Eternity Ring.

    Women of my Generation (and before) kept the rings they were given originally… they just might add to them

    Example… My own mother added on a more significant Diamond Ring when she was married 25 years.  And this was my wish too… I NEVER would have dreamed of expecting my Hubby to buy me another Diamond Ring before that kind of milestone (other than the 3rd ring to my Bridal Set, or a Family / Mothers Ring to mark the birth of our kids)

    So honestly altho I’ve been a jewellery lover for many decades I never heard of the whole… I want a replacement ring / upgrade concept until I came to WBee.

    Sometimes I get it (don’t have a lot of money now, want to add on later… then it is a mutual agreement) and sometimes I find it very self centered ungrateful behavior (I don’t like the ring I got, I want something better)

    I don’t understand why someone cannot accept / embrace what they have now and move on.

    An Engagement / Marriage is certainly a lot more than just a ring / piece of jewellery

    And gosh there are years and decades ahead when one can add on… and still keep the original sentiment etc.

    My First Marriage, we didn’t have a lot of money (fresh faced Uni Grads) we got what we could afford which at the time wasn’t much… Gold skyrocketing, and Interest Rates thru the roof (20% and up).  Consequently my ring was mostly gold… no money left over for a diamond.  Just a chip to say it was there (illusion / enhancer settings were HUGE in the 1980s so as to make the tiny diamond look bigger)

    And I wore this ring without the thought of another for 20+ years.  No complaints

    This time when we married, Mr TTR & I are in a far better place financially… semi-retired, no big bills (mortgage)… so we splurged.  We did because we could.. and because we knew that this was probably it… we may not be around for a 25th Anniversary.

    My ring now is today and the future.  It is also the past… because when I am out with my long time married friends who have received gorgeous rings for their now milestone Anniversaries… 20, 25, 30, 35… my very sparkly set fits right in.

    Again no regrets.

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    10219 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I should add…

    I VOTED – NEVER ACCEPTABLE

    Because I believe that my ERing & WBand are THE ONES…

    I can add to “the stack”… but I won’t alter what I already have because their meaning is so significant as they are

    He proposed lovingly with one… and the other was Blessed along with our Marriage Vows

    You can do a Renewal of Vows (those are cool in my book), but never can you go back and have a do-over for your actual vows (not in time / space / or even legally)

     

    Post # 14
    Member
    154 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I feel the whole idea of upgrades to be a little silly honestly. Whatever makes people happy. I wouldn’t do it unless it involved reusing all the materials from my first ring. I mean, the same metal, the same stone. Otherwise whats the point of a forever ring??? But I’m also getting a very very simple solitaire…. I voted 10 years… 

    Post # 15
    Member
    2052 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I don’t think I will ever upgrade my ring, it would break FI’s heart. If he ever bought me another ring I would wear that on my right hand and still wear my e-ring on my left where it belongs. However, fi’s aunt just upgraded after 25 years of marriage and I thought it was nice that she was so happy with it. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    1080 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    A new ring/piece of jewellery ok, I would definitely not say no if DH offered. However my e-ring and wedding band are symbolic and sentimental. I would never upgrade them.

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