I have always been the bridesmaid, and have yet to the bride 🙂 So, my view is from a completely different perspective, but has been witnessed thru the years nonetheless!
I have been a BM 6 times total, twice being the MOH. For me, I was engulfed in their process, their day, etc. (And no, I am not bragging!!). I spent money I dresses I loved, and dresses I hated. I planned parties, attended parties, paid for parties and traveled to parties – without ever letting the bride know that I may have been frustrated, or over my spending limit, or whatever!!
Feeling as if I have been a pretty stand-up BM (not bragging, SWEAR 🙂 ), I STILL worry about my future wedding day, and am already trying to figure out how I will alter my attitude, or not be hurt. And it is NOT because I do not have the most amazing gals in the world, whom I want standing next to me, but because I feel that a lot of people have a ‘been there, done that’ attitude AFTER their big day. More so, in the they have moved on type of way, and not in the ‘they could care less’ type of way. Maybe, for me, it is because they got married in our mid twenties, and I will not be married until my early 30’s. They have started their families, and are well passed their newlywed phase, etc.
SO, while I hope they will prove me otherwise, I have seen that mentality when they are telling me about weddings they are in of friends I do not know well, such as how much money they are spending, or how they have to buy a dress, or travel (HELLO, all things people did for them!)….does that make sense?!