Post # 1
Hello everyone, I am recently engaged and I am the first out of all my siblings to be getting married. My family and I are all very excited to be planning for the big day, that being said, the other day my sisters and I went to visit our mom and she surprised me by pulling out her wedding dress and having me try it on. My sisters and I had already decided beforehand that we would go dress shopping. My mom’s dress is nice, but it just isn’t me. If I were to use to her dress, I would have to alter it dramatically in order to be happy with it. Is there another way that I can incorporate my mom’s dress into my wedding?
Post # 2
rebecayramos : That is such a sweet gesture and sentiment. Likely, it won’t be able to be altered worth the cost and headache and you’re better off getting a new dress altogether. That being said, you could somehow use her fabric for a veil or perhaps a wrap on your bouquet. I special hairpiece, or maybe depending on her dress you could make a small first communion dress for your future children (if you do that kind of thing). The limits are only your imagination!
Post # 3
Be patient with her if she has a hard time, as this was probably something she imagined when she first bought her dress. I’d gently explain that it was your dream to go shopping with her and your sisters, you always wanted that experience, and could you instead borrow something else to wear (earrings, veil)? Maybe display wedding photographs of important couples in your and FI’s life at the ceremony/reception.
I’d wait to mess with the dress until after your sisters/cousins have gotten married, they may end up deciding they want to wear it.
Post # 4
Too bad she isn’t more understanding that you want to experience dress shopping youself, and pick out your own dress. She must has this idea in her head that she would pass it on to her daughter. I like the idea of using parts of the dress for something else. Win win in both cases 🙂
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2017 - Combermere Abbey
Be kind and patient with your mum. She doesn’t mean to force you to do anything you do not want to do. I’m sure it’s coming from a place of love. Just kindly say you’ll consider it but would like to go shopping. Most likely what will happen is that she will see you in newer dresses and change her mind!
Post # 6
rebecayramos : Awww, that’s so sweet. I’ve seen people that have repurposed their mothers dress into a handkerchief that you can wrap around your bouquet. Would that work for mom?
I love that she’s sentimental though…my mom is overly pragmatic and she donated her wedding dress years ago. Even though she has 2 daughters! Lol
Post # 7
Did she say she hopes that you wear it? She might have just wanted you to try it on for sentimental purposes with zero expectations.
Post # 8
My mom’s dress wouldn’t have fit me nor was it in the condition to be worn, so she cut off large pieces of her lace and we wrapped it around my bouquet.
Post # 9
I’ve seen it done that you take a piece of the older generation’s dress and turn it into a pocket that you sew into the lining of your dress and it can hold a something blue/borrowed – like a borrowed ring with a blue stone or something similar and make sure to get a photo during the get ready with the mother, daughter, and the hem flipped over to show the pocket. It’s very sweet and keeps the wonderful gesture but without the dated/faded/doesn’t fit dress problems.
Post # 10
Did she wear a veil, or another piece of jewelry you can incorporate into your look?
Post # 11
Can you use her wedding jewelery instead of her dress? My mom wore her mother’s bridal jewellery on her wedding and I wore the same. We are passing it down to the next generation.
Post # 12
I used a piece of my grandmother’s veil wrapped around my bouquet. Maybe you could do something like that?
Post # 13
cassiegirl : This was my thought–if she didn’t actually say she expects any of her kids to wear it, she may very well have just had an impulsive desire to see her dress on her daughter. If you can fit in mom’s dress, put it on, strike some fun poses, take some pictures, have some fun with it. If her mom’s anything like my mom, mom is never going to fit in that dress again, so this is the only way to see it on again!
Then tell her what you like about it, but what you really want in your own dress, and take her shopping.
And if she does have the idea of you wearing it, go for the easiest out of all: see if any of your siblings might have an interest in it. If you plan on altering it beyond recognition and you have a little sister who digs vintage chic and wants to someday wear it as is, there you go. Model it for mom, put it back in the box to save for Little Sister. It may not be an option, but it may!
Post # 14
Do you have a picture of your mom’s dress? Wondering if part of it can be made into a jacket or something. I know you don’t plan on wearing it, but I would love to see pictures of it or pictures of you in it if possible. I love vintage! Maybe if people see pictures of it would make it easier to come up with suggestions.
Post # 15
Depending on the style, you may be able to shorten it/remove sleeves etc and have it altered into something to wear to your rehearsal dinner. (Then you would also have lots of left over fabric to make some other accessory if you want to include on your wedding day).