(Closed) When should a bridal shower take place?

posted 9 years ago in June 2010
Post # 3
Member
369 posts
Helper bee

How many showers are you having? When you say “several showers” do you mean one bridal shower, one wedding shower, etc? I would say have them at least a month before the wedding if you don’t want guests to purchase a shower and wedding gift so close together.

As for the date, the hostess and you will work together to see what fits both of your schedules. I think you’d be too busy with other wedding preparations to have one of your showers 3 weeks before the wedding. Some out of towners might not be able to make it since they would have to come for the wedding so soon.

Post # 4
Member
336 posts
Helper bee

I was wondering this too. I’m thinking between 1 and 2 months out. I’ll be finishing up school, and the weekend date that is one month prior to my wedding is my sister’s high school graduation, which I don’t want to take from her!

Post # 5
Member
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Whatever works for you!  My aunt hosted a shower and asked me about the date, and we planned it so that one of my best friends (and BM) would be able to participate before she moved across the country.  It ended up being like 4 months before the wedding, but who cares?  It worked for us.  My FI’s side is having another for us, about 4 weeks before the wedding, but I wasn’t really consulted much on that date.  I don’t think there are really any firm rules about showers. 

Post # 6
Member
1220 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Since our wedding is the week after New Years, my shower is in November.  We didn’t want to add one more thing for people to do in December, so we’re just having it earlier.

Post # 7
Member
336 posts
Helper bee

Makes sense, but the earlier I get presents the earlier I’m going to want to use them!!

Post # 8
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

That last comment brings up a good point. Are you “allowed” to use them if you receive the gifts before your married. My mom was telling me I have to keep them all packed away until after the wedding. She said that if I had to return them to the guests it would be better if I hadn’t used them yet… I’m not sure where she is getting this idea that I will have to return my gifts? We are both extremely certain we are getting married.

Are you all using gifts when you receive them, even if they are technically wedding gifts and it’s before your date?

Post # 9
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

@Miss Sapphire   My family is doing the same thing. Since the wedding is right after Christmas, we all decided to have the showers before Thanksgiving. No one needs another thing to do during the holiday season!

Have you had any friends or family ask why the shower was so early? I guess I don’t really know the etiquette about how far in advance a shower should be, but she was surprised how early it was – until I explained the reasoning behind it.

Post # 10
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’d say go for 1-2 months out. I’m getting married in May, so I think a March/April shower (hah – april shower!) would be nice.

Oh, and as for if you can use the gifts or not: I’d think you can use shower gifts right away since they were gifts for the shower and not the wedding, right? Then again, I won’t be moving in with FI and setting up our home until after the wedding, so I guess most of the gifts can’t really be used before then anyway…

Post # 11
Member
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m gettign married in June and my shower is going to be the weekend after Easter – so April 10 (I think). We are planning it then because I have a BM getting married at the end of April, so I don’t want to take away from her celebration, but we can’t have it at Easter (the first week of April ’10).

I’m only having one shower, but it’ll be 11 weeks before my wedding, so about 3 months before. I think you should have a shower before your invitations go out.

Post # 12
Member
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’ve hear 1-2 months out is a good time range.  That’s nice of you to make sure people don’t have to go to all of them, my fiance is the best man in this guy’s wedding next month and he went to the 3rd shower on Sunday….he’s already spent $200 in gifts and it’s not even the wedding yet!  People will really appreciate you thinking of that.

Post # 13
Member
2682 posts
Sugar bee

1-2 months is good, maybe even 2.5 months before.  Work on the date with the hostess and you, obviously the date needs to work for you so you can be there 🙂  Maybe give the hostess a list of dates that would work for you and go from there.  I checked with my BM’s and people that I REALLY wanted to be able to come to the shower before we selected a date.

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