When should I write thank you notes?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would send everyone from the shower a thank you right away. Then they get a second thank you after the wedding.

Post # 4
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Right away.

Also, most will get a shower and a wedding gift. So you’ll need to send two separate cards.

Post # 5
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Start writing them ASAP!! It’s never too early to show gratitude. I’ve heard it explained this way: If they think you’re ungrateful, they might skimp on your wedding present. 🙁

Post # 6
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I had three bridal showers, I had thank you notes out to all gift givers and hosts within a week.. Or less in one of the cases. My mom is a thank you note nazi, so I must get it from her! We didn’t use any of the gift cards or cash any checks until the thank you cards were out. Same plan for wedding gifts.


Post # 7
3246 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I had my shower yesterday and just finished writing thank you cards right now. Guests will get a second thank you card after the wedding as well.

Post # 8
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@Britt_RN:  +1.  

Save yourself the headache of writing a million thank you notes at once and do the shower ones now, and the wedding ones later.  

Post # 9
2472 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa

@brookiebaby820:  two gifts = two cards

Always send thank-yous ASAP! 😀

Post # 10
1243 posts
Bumble bee

Shower/stagette cards should be sent within 3 weeks of the event.  Gifts given at these events are for the bride, and can be used immediately, therefore the bride should be thanking her guests for them

Gifts given for the wedding are for the couple, should not be used until after the wedding has taken place, and the thank you should be from the couple (even if he doesn’t write it, you should sign it from both of you).

It is unacceptable to send one card thanking for two gifts given for 2 different events–your guest went through the time, effort and expense to buy you two gifts, you should do the same in thanking them.

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