When to send invites?

posted 3 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I am sending my STD’s out 8 months in advance, and the wedding invites 4 months in advance [with rsvp’s due 1 month before the date]

Post # 4
5 posts
  • Wedding: June 2014

We are getting married in June 2014, I purchased my invites the same time as the STD’s because I found ones I liked and wanted to take my time in addressing the envelopes.  We sent our STD around Thanksgiving and invites will go out in March, with RSVP being 1 month before the wedding.  Our wedding is out of town for everyone (Its in Winter Park, Co and we live in Denver, with much of the Family in Fl & IN).  I had read to give more time for destination type weddings.  Also hotel rooms at our venue can start being booked Jan. 1st, so I wanted to give people a heads up of getting a room of their choice.

Good luck!

Post # 5
6525 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

@mrsjordan53014:  i sent STD’s 8 months out, and i sent invites out 2 1/2 months out with an RSVP date of 1 month before the wedding.


Post # 6
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

We are getting married on 1/19. We sent out the invites on 11/1 and our rsvps were due back 12/1.

Post # 7
128 posts
Blushing bee

We’re sending our invites in beginning of April and are getting married July 7th, with an RSVP date of June 1st. This way it gives people two months to decide.  I would say 75% of our guests are out of the state, thus they will need to boook flights.  Based on my research once you hit the 2 month mark for a flight date, they prices jump, so we wanted to give people an extra month to book flights with out high prices, but not too much time that they’ll “think about it later” and end up fogetting. I’ve already picked out the invitation design and hope to have them ordered by february or march, since the process to make them will take 3 weeks, before they are at my door.




Post # 8
10748 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’d send them in March if it were me. 

Post # 9
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I sent my invitations out in October for my January wedding (3 months in advance).  I set a RSVP date for 1 month before the wedding…and am still following up with people.  Give yourself plenty of time, I think 3 months in advance is perfect!

Post # 11
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Etiquette Snob here… lol

Generally speaking, the Invites should go out in a timeframe that is AT LEAST 6 to 8 Weeks BEFORE the Wedding (or the Date that you need to make Confirmed Numbers by).  As a rule of thumb… 12 Weeks / 3 Months in advance is the usual max.

As far as B-Lists… there is nothing wrong from an Etiquette POV with B-Lists the trick lies in being a good enough Host to manage them effectively… they require extra work, because the important thing, is that NO ONE on a B-List should ever be aware they are (the latest timeframe that a B-List Invite should go out is 3 Weeks before you NEED TO KNOW BY DATE)

Ideally, if you have an A & B-List you are working with 2 Sets of RSVPs, with 2 Different Dates printed on them.

If that isn’t possible (you didn’t think that far ahead when you ordered the RSVPs) then you need to get the A-Listers Invites out with plenty of time to spare… in hopes that the NOs will reply quickly.

The best way to manage an A-List is to send those Invites that are furthest away out first (nothing wrong with mailing out Invites in a staggered fashion, a few everytime you get some done / ready to go… handy too if you plan to do your own Calligraphy).

In this way too… people will receive them over a broader amount of time so there is NO Red Flags that go up that say… that all the A-Listers have theirs… so I must be on the B-List.

As for B-Listers…

Organize your list by Preferance… prioritize who you really really would love to have if you have room.

When the NOs come in… you can send out the Invites in order.

So as to keep a “bit of wiggle space” the rule of thumb for Guests that are replying NO from near (vs far) is that for every NO that comes in you send out half-as-many New Invites from the B-List… just incase anyone calls you back closer to the Wedding to say they’ve made alternate arrangements and are now happy to change their NO to a YES.

So… Say you sent an Invite to Uncle Bob & Aunt Sally… and their kids Robert Jr & Susan.  They RSVP with a NO.  That is 4 NOs.

You can now issue an Invite from your B-List for 2 People… so your College Roommate Jane and her Hubby Frank.

And you can send it out immediately… no need to wait until all the NOs come in.

Hope this helps,


Post # 12
820 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@mrsjordan53014:  I bought my invites this past Nov. and I’m sending them out the middle of April. We’re getting married the end of June. 

Post # 13
1721 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@mrsjordan53014:  I was wondering this too. I saw a few things saying to send it out 3 months early which would be early February for us… But my mom keeps telling me it’s way too early? So I have no idea 

Post # 14
1311 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 1994

Do it now!!! It is nice to give folks as much notice as possible.

Post # 16
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@mrsjordan53014:  I would send them out the week after your bridal shower. Three to two months is in the acceptable range. When are your numbers due to your venues and caterers? 

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