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This is a tough one. I've always wondered how people go about doing this. Are you going to have a different set of response cards for the B-listers? Because they will know they are B-listers if they get their invitations in the mail after the RSVP date.
But I think you could send your first round of invitations out 11-12 weeks before the wedding. With an RSVP date of 6 weeks before the wedding. Then send the second round out 6 weeks from the wedding (or as you get the negative responses) with an RSVP date of 3 weeks before the wedding.
I'm actually having everyone RSVP 6 weeks before the wedding due to hotel blocking, so I don't think 6 weeks is too far in advance to ask for the RSVPs.
The good thing is I am making my invites so I can make the B Listers different response cards. ...that July 1 date i was thinking would be 7 weeks before the wedding so not too far off form the 6 weeks it said...so I guess it could be okay..
I think 12 weeks would be fine.... nice touch by doing different RSVP dates, btw.
Im sending out my invites this weekend (90days ahead), rsvp date is Marc 1st, then after we receive our rsvps we will send out batch B which will be on the 60 day mark
Here's what Real Simple says::
Successful B-listing depends on secrecy and timing. Here's the drill.
-Organize your A-list alphabetically (easy to locate names when they RSVP) and your B-list by rank order.
-Put A-list into the mail about eight weeks before your wedding.
-After two weeks, total up the number of noes you've received and add 20 percent. That number is how many B-list invites you can send.
-Mail B-list invites within six weeks of the wedding date. Since you are sending the second round in a group, within a six to eight week range, there's less chance of offending B-listers. They might not catch on, since other guests received their invites at the same time.
----Thats what they had to say :) I thought it was helpful.
I would also wait to send out your invites to A-listers who are good friends or family with any B-listers...to avoid the gossip and the result of you getting caught B-listing :)
I love the idea of changing the RSVP date, we too are August 21st-ers and also have a B List because our venue is so small! I really like the advice that @ashleyjean mentioned from Real Simple as well.
I think the RSVP thing is def good. Helps to have a bit more time in there...
Our wedding is May 21, and we are sending out our first round of invites March 1 with an April 1 RSVP, then making more response cards as needed for the B list with a later RSVP date. Luckily our friend designed our invites and is printing them for us, so it shouldn't be too difficult!
We're sending our first batch out in February with a late March RSVP date and the second batch will go out in March with a late April RSVP for our May wedding. Our first group are all people that would talk to each other, as are our second so that everyone who knows each other will get their invites at the same time. There is no interation between the two groups as they are his side and my side. I feel a little bad sending some of them so early, but since every single person in our first batch will have to travel (by plane) I figure they will already know if they can come or not. We also have a third batch of people that live close to the venue that we can give less notice to, so if we have room, we will invite them too. It's a little complicated, but if you keep it organized from the start, it's not too bad.
I printed all of our invitations myself, so it was easy to have different dates.
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So I am getting married on August 21st - I guess typically I would send them 8 weeks out (June 21st) and say to respond by August 1 or something like that?
But I have a B list and if enough of the A list RSVP's no, there are a good 10-15 people I may want to invite, but not 3 weeks before the wedding.
Can I send my invites our 12 weeks in andvance and ask for a response by like July 1st?