(Closed) When to send wedding invitations

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I think all wedding invites should be sent out 6-8 weeks ahead of time— regardless of if you are traveling or not.  Those out of towners who are very close to the bride should have been notified by word of mouth or STD earlier about where the wedding would be and hotel accomodations.

If you are as close to the bride as you think you are, then you can simply call up your friend and ask if you’re invited.  As a bride, I would have no problem with someone close to me asking if they are coming or not.  If I were not close to the person and she asked if she were invited, it would put me in a tough spot (because I would feel bad saying no), but oh well!  You’re going to find out eventually that you’re not invited!

Post # 4
Member
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I agree! I think 6-8 weeks is a proper time especially for out of town guests.

Post # 5
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

My wedding is in September.  I want to send out my “A” list end of June and request a response by July 31.  My”B” list will be sent out end of July and I will request a response by August.  Hopefully this gives everyone enough time to get a hotel, respond, etc. if they need to.

Post # 6
Member
11327 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

My wedding is the last weekend of february and i plan to send out exactly 2 months in advance with an RSVP date 1 month in advance. 

Post # 7
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

sorry, but it sounds like you’re on the B-list!

Post # 8
Member
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I hate to say this but it sounds like a B list if she told you that she already sent out some but not yours.  I think most people tend to invite everyone at once unless they have a B list.

Post # 9
Member
145 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@posh_princess: I’m thinking about the A list and B list thing because I’m obligated to invite my entire, large family, but I don’t think many will actually attend. If they do, then I need to change the B list by A LOT.

I’m wondering though, do you get RSVPs printed with two dates or how do you deal with two deadlines? Do companies charge extra for two sets of RSVPs?

Post # 10
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

@NotFridaythe13th:  A “B-list” is considered very offensive (no one wants to be a second class guest).  That’s not to say that you shouldn’t do it (there are obviously practical reasons), but you should never let guests know that they are on the B-list. Something like two sets of dates on an RSVP card would be wrong.  you would need to print two sets of RSVP cards (which does usually cost more – but remember it’s a money saving venture to have two waves of invites). 

If you want to know if your large family will attend  without the cost of two sets of RSVP cards, ask your parents to ask around to see who is likely to come.

Post # 11
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I think if you know a lot of guests have to travel 8-10 weeks out is a good amount of time. If only a small percentage of your guests have to travel I think 6-8 is more appropriate. Your friend is approx 8 weeks away from her wedding so she may have sent them out.

Post # 12
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

We’re having a destination and the invitations are going out at 6 weeks. However, we’re sending out newsletters and have information on our website about hotel blocks and discounts, etc.

Since the Bridal Room Rate already closed out, it sounds like you’re a B lister 🙁

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