Post # 1
We are still pretty early along now, and we’ve told only our immediate families. We’d like to wait until 12 weeks to start telling anyone else. We told DH’s parents/siblings in person, and it was so fun to see their reactions. We decided to tell my family around the same time, but I did it on the phone, and I can’t help feeling slightly disappointed that I didn’t get to share the news in a more personal way.
DH’s cousin is getting married this summer, and I’ll be around 17 weeks at the wedding. It’ll probably be our first opportunity to see most of his cousins and aunts/uncles in person (and he’s pretty close to them). I’d love to tell them in person, maybe discreetly and individually after the rehearsal dinner or something like that. We definitely wouldn’t make a big public announcement, or say anything at the wedding, but people might ask why I’m not drinking, and I frankly will probably be showing a little by then. Or should we just call people this summer and tell them ahead of time? My MIL is going to be bursting at the seams to tell people, so just giving her the go-ahead is another option.
Thanks Bees, I appreciate your opinions!
Post # 3
I wouldn’t wait until your cousins wedding to tell people. Even if you do it discreetly, it would still have a vibe of “stealing their thunder”. I would probably tell everyone before, either by phone calls or email, and then have them be able to congratulate you in person at the wedding.
Plus, at 17 weeks, there is a good chance you’ll have a cute bump, and it might be awkward between when you show up and people notice, and when you can actually tell them. You don’t want to be the subjec of whispers that take the attention away from the bride and groom.
Post # 4
@ExcitedScaredBee: +1 I would either tell everyone beforehand or let your MIL.
Post # 5
I’d let your MIL tell everyone earlier, before the wedding. Like you said, you’ll probably be showing by then, and you don’t want the wedding to become about people talking about your pregnancy (because, really, even if you’re discreet about telling them, people talk). Anyways, I’m sure she’s excited to spread the news to her family. This is my plan once we are expecting – tell our families, then let the mothers spread the word once we’re around 12 weeks. They’ll be so excited to share the news about becoming a grandma!
Post # 6
Yeah, I’d start telling people around the 12-14 week mark and let the family news machine do the rest. By 17 weeks for me it was definitely attracting a side eye and whispers so definitely don’t try to keep it secret.
Post # 7
Alright, alright, I hear what you’re all saying. We’ll spread the word before the wedding. I’m just bummed because none of our family members live in my town, and aside from my doctor and a co-worker who figured it out when I turned green at work, I haven’t gotten to tell anyone in person. But you’re right, it’ll still be fun to talk about it when I see them.