When & where to draw the line?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

There are a lot of red flags there…if you haven’t met any of his friends and family, and haven’t been integrated into his life, I’d be wondering if you’re the main part of it.  Come out and ask him if he is on facebook.  If he says yes, ask him to add you.  If she says no and you’ve seen that he has one, he’s already lying to you and you know that something definitely isn’t right.

 

Post # 4
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Yeah that sounds a little fishy…

Post # 5
Member
2305 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

It seems extremely, extremely odd to me that he has a Facebook page that has private content on it that you can’t see.

You’ve been together 18 months. Anything that the rest of his Facebook friends can see, you should probably be able to see.

Post # 6
Member
2515 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@PoppyRose:  this is super weird. why arent you allowed to see his FB? And why does hs ‘friend’ hav a zillion cuddly pics of them all over her fb? Also it has been almost 2 years and you havent met his family? Red flag even if it is long distance.

I would confront him and just ask him why he is keeping you from his real life before you get more invested.

Post # 7
Member
5483 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@PoppyRose:  uhhh her profile pic? What the what? Unacceptable. Also weird.

Post # 8
Member
795 posts
Busy bee

@PoppyRose:  Fishy. Women have an amazing intuition. If you’re suspicious, there’s likely a reason unfortunately. :(. You need to get to the bottom of it, and fast. 

Post # 10
Member
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@PoppyRose:  Super bizarre. Is it possible this other girl is actually also his girlfriend, and you have not met any friends or family because they already know her as his girlfriend?

Post # 11
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@rachelmichelle:  +1… 18 months and nobody knows who you are, and you’re on his facebook’s restricted list? That’s some of the fishiest business I’ve heard in a long time. OP, you need to talk to him and get him to be honest real quick. A year and a half is WAY too long for this kind of behavior. 

Post # 12
Member
7385 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@PoppyRose:  So basically by locked down you mean that his privacy settings are really high and you get to see just as much as anyone else he is FB friends with?

 

Post # 13
Member
2305 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@PoppyRose:  I guess it would make more sense if his Facebook WAS actually shut down/deleted, but this still seems strange. I just feel like something is off.

As a teacher, there are plenty of ways to keep your Facebook private- you can adjust the settings so that you cannot be found in the Facebook search, you can make your profile ‘locked’ to people who are not on your friends list, and you can put acquaintances on your friends list on a ‘restricted’ list so that they cannot see any posts that you don’t want them to see.

How exactly did you find this friend of his who has all the photos of him posted? Is he tagged in these photos and you couldn’t see them before you started digging around?

Post # 14
Member
2368 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Something is VERY wrong here. My personal intuition is that he’s married or in a relationship. 

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