When you KNOW someone is being cheated on….

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
498 posts
Helper bee

I may get flamed for this, but I say tell her. You could ‘Jersey Shore’  style it and send her something anonymous if you cant bring yourself to say it.

 

Id want to know. And her sexual/reproductive health is atrisk being with a cheating partner.

Post # 3
Member
518 posts
Busy bee

Wow, that really is not cool of him to put you in that position. I know I would want to tell her, because I would want someone to tell me, but I don’t think you can without ending the friendship, so I would probably do nothing. I would absolutely confront him privately, though, and tell him if he can’t be faithful to her then he shouldn’t be with her and remind him he’s putting her life at risk and it’s not OK. He doesn’t suck at monogamy, he sucks at monogamy with her.

Post # 4
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Nona99:  ugh. Have you told him that he’s putting you in a very bad spot? 

What do you do if you’re alone together and she starts saying that she’s not sure if she’s his one and only and that she worries he has a wandering eye. What, do you just stay close-mouthed and become her friend? Or do you tell her? Do you put off being friendly and becoming friends with her because you’re not sure if he’s ever going to stop and they will break up? 

He needs to figure his shit out before bringing his friends into it.

Post # 8
Member
498 posts
Helper bee

I personally know two ladies who got herpes from cheating boyfriends, and someone else who had pre-cancerous cervical cells removed that had appeared from an advanced STD she got from her cheating baby’s father. Thank god they were found in time.

Tell her.

Post # 9
Member
851 posts
Busy bee

I would talk to your friend and tell him that you are not comfortable with the two of them visiting when you know that he is being unfaithful, and until he gets his shit together you don’t want him/them in your home. I know this person is your best friend, but he is also showing a pretty nasty part of his charater and I think it’s important that he know you can’t/won’t act like he’s part of a happy little family. Doing nothing feels to me like it would be supporting his decision(s) to cheat. Not to mention that he’s putting the health of all of his partners at risk if he’s engaging in any unprotected sex.

Post # 10
Member
918 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Five years ago I would have told you that you’re his friend rather than hers, and it’s not your relationship and not your place to get involved…

However, your friend opened that can of worms by telling you in the first place. It’s not like you saw him with the other woman and found out completely by accident.

Post # 12
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

even though its none of my business, i always tell someone wheni know they are getting cheated on. I would want someone to tell me. I’d be so upset if I had been getting cheated on for months and other people knew, but no one told me. I’d feel hurt and then on top of that, also embaressed and humliated.

Whether they chose to stay or go, that’s their initiative. They can do with the information as they please. But I need to do the right thing and tell them.

Also, most every time this has happened, the person chooses not to believe me and stays with the person. and every time that has happened, ive gotten a call at some point down the road saying i was right..they should have listened…and if they had of listened it would have saved them from so much more hurt down the road….etc. most people dont want to hear it at first but then come back and are very thankful once the relationship ends.

Post # 14
Member
1737 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014 - 13th ~ TN

Nona99:  I would not tell her, because he is the one that is your friend.

Post # 15
Member
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would tell her anonymously. He put you in a very hard spot, something that a good friend wouldn’t have done. He actually probably went to you looking to be told it was okay, which it absolutely is not. I would want someone to tell me if DH was cheating on me, because I have never had any other sexual partners, and neither has DH. If I was suddenly being put at risk for STD’s when I had done everything right to protect myself, I would want to know.

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