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When/How did you decide to stay TTC?

posted 9 months ago in Babies
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    424 posts
    Helper bee
    LoveliestLove    July 19, 2010  

    Hi Bees :)

    My husband and I are in a good place (financially) in our lives. However, I am kind of comfortable just relaxing and loving life right now to the point where I can put off having kids for awhile...

    But my husband is older than I am and everyone would just be extatic if we had kids (First grandchild on BOTH SIDES)...

    So, were thinking our 1 yr anniversary we will start TTC. Mind you, although we've only been married 6m now, we have been together for 5 years before that.

    I am excited at the prospect but scared...I have no one but my husband to talk to about this because we are private people so I am coming to you! & of course my husband would love love love to have kids so he is one-sided bias :))) Please share your thoughts/stories....

     
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    Bumble bee
    cvbee    August 13, 2010   canada

    If the one year point feels right to you, then make it the one year thing!  You could even make it part of your 1 year anniversary gift....a card that says you want to start to try.  It could be so sweet!

    I hear you on the first grandchild on both sides thing. I was the first grandchild on both sides, so first of all i say that your kid is a lucky ducky!!!  (I'll be the first grandchild to have a baby on my side, unless one of my unwed cousins beats me to it....we're TTC).

    I'd say that I was ready for TTC maybe 6 months before my husband was (since we were not in the financial place at that time) and I took some time to sort out how we could make it financially okay and talked to him about it and we set a general time when we could start.

    I had a doctor appointment to go over the plan before we started and I'm glad I did that, so maybe that is something for you to consider.  (I just 'brought it up' with my doctor at my annual general).  

    Congratulations on beginning to think about it.  Before long you are going to be one of the crazy bees like me who is constantly posting to all the TTC threads.  :)  Now you can start to 'lurk with interest'! :)  horray for you! 

     
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    Bumble bee
    carrieknitscake    October 10, 2009   Chicago, IL

    We wanted two years of marriage before having kids. For us, it was about having some time to enjoy marriage before kids. Ours will be a fourth grandchild for my parents and first for my husband's. So, not a big deal for the families. We'll be trying soon as our second anniversary approaches.

     
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    Helper bee
    FutureMrsMonty11    September 10, 2011   Oklahoma City

    FI and I have a two and a half year old, so my number one thing before we TTC for the next one is that we are married lol. We are getting married next month and honestly, as silly as it sounds, the only thing I am worried about for getting pregnant this time around is the timing! Having been big pregnant in the summer (DS was born in November) I now know that I never want that again if I can help it. Therefore, I decided I want to get pregnant in the summer and have a spring baby if possible. Also, FI and I are not going on a "real" honeymoon until next June so I'd like to start trying then. :)

     
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    Buzzing bee
    MissGreen    July 2009  

    In a perfect world we would have started now, we just passed our 2 year anniversary. However we started after 6 mths bc time wasn't on our side; I had Stage 3 Endometriosis and had a small window and we knew about that about 2 years prior to TTC. I've always wanted to be an older Mom, i.e. 1st child right around or a little before 35 but damn female problems! If you guys are comfortable and feel ready you don't need Antibes approval or any guideline! :) Good luck!

     
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    424 posts
    Helper bee
    LoveliestLove    July 19, 2010  

    @cvbee: Thank you so much for sharing your story...I too was the 1st gradnchild and I have no cousins so I will be the ONLY ONE to give my mothers side a gradnbaby-ever. My husband is the eldest and his siblings are'nt married and aren't currently dating seriously so I think it will be a great shocker and to my husband....I think i'll tell him I threw out my BC on our anniversary...were going on a second honeymoon so i'll probably tell him then!

    All you ladies: Thanks so much for sharing your personal stories!!! Baby making is soooo special and time sensitive but like some of you said...when it's time, it's time!

    I actually want to be pregnant in the summer because no winter coat will fit over my bump! It's cold where I live!

     
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    Newbee
    soontobemama    September 9, 2009  

    I think deciding when is definitely different for everyone. But a couple main factors went into us TTC. I have endometriosis and even though I'm on the younger side (23) my doctors were advising me to start trying asap. We wanted to wait until I got my bachelors though, so we started trying pretty much as soon after that as possible. Also, in 2 years my husband is going to be entering is medical residency so since he will be working about 80 hours/week during that we wanted to have a baby before so he could be around to enjoy it for awhile without the exhaustion of residency. 

    We did opt to wait a year after we got married though so we could have a year of just married bliss :) We were like you, together for a long time before we got married - we were together for 7 years so now its been a total of 8 1/2 years of being together and I am 8 weeks pregnant! :)

     
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    424 posts
    Helper bee
    LoveliestLove    July 19, 2010  

    @soontobemama: That makes sense! and CONGRATS!!!

     

     
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    Buzzing bee
    squeak35    July 7, 2011   Cali

    My DH and I wanted to TTC right after the wedding since we are both in our 40s.  Unfortunately, due to fibriods, we won't be able to try until Nov.  We're excited though to begin in Nov cause we do want a family.  Also I'm lucky that several of my friends are in the same boat so the age issue isn't really bothering me.

     

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