Post # 1
Ok. Super stressing going on over here in Katerdid land….
My wedding is fairly small – I only sent out 41 invites for a total of 81 people. I have room at my venue for 55 people, but most of my guests are out of state and so I knew that most of them wouldn’t come.
I sent my invites early for this reason, to give time for them to figure out money, travel, work, etc issues.
The deadline was on the 10th. I’m missing 13 of them for a total of 26 people. !!!!!! That’s 26 extra chairs and 5 tables and $150 that I may or may not need. Plus I’m having an after party (so I can see my far away family longer) that only 15 people that have said they are coming.
My uncles are the ones I can email. Is this email rude or not rude enough? Should I send it or get my dad to call his brothers?
I haven’t received your RSVP cards that were due on the 10th, and I was hoping you could let me know if you sent them yet.
I know Virginia is far away, and it takes some planning and issues with money, time off work, etc on your part. But, the wedding is in 31 days and I need the headcount so I can rent chairs, tables, get the correct amount of food, and so on. So far the status of 26 people are unknown, which is kind of a lot. That’s an additional 26 chairs and 5 tables that I may or may not need, among other things.
So if you could let me know what your plan is and either call or email me or Wayne I would really, really appreciate it. And if you could, please send in your RSVP cards either way; I’d hate for that stamp to go to waste.
Thank you so much!
Your favorite niece,
Post # 3
Isn’t it amazing how people just don’t bother to RSVP? Looks like you’re going to have to get on the phone with the 13 who didn’t respond. Ask family members to help, too. No need to go into such detail, just something like, “Hey there, our RSVP deadline passed and I didn’t get your response, will you be able to attend?”
Post # 4
I agree with lilybay about not going into that much detail
Post # 5
Ok. Less detail. I can do that. I just hope they respond. Makes me so mad that they can’t take time to write their name, check a box and stick it in their mailbox. Ugh.
Post # 6
I think that’s waaaay too much information, but I also don’t think it’s rude to send a follow-up e-mail. I think lilybay’s suggestion keeps it short and to the point!
Post # 7
You need to get on the phone with your guests asap to find out if they are attending or not. Never assume anything. If you cannot reach anyone, count them as a no-show. If they show up anyway at the wedding and have nowhere to sit, it is not your fault.
Be aware that email is not the best way to contact people if you need a quick response as a number of people go a long time in between checking theirs.
Post # 8
I didn’t read your email all the way through, but a think a phone call might be a better choice. It’s more personal and since you’re having a small wedding and they are family I think it is important to make personal contact.
On a side note, I gave Fiance the reply postcard for my friends wedding for him to mail off at the beginning of last week. (he takes care of the mail, I honestly have nothing to do with it) The deadline for the card is TODAY and I woke up to a FACEBOOK message from my friend, the bride. It is not even a private message, it includes like 20 other people on it that says she really needs to know the RSVP’s for her wedding. I think that was WAYYYYY tacky, and if you knew that the ABSOLUTE last day you needed know was TODAY then don’t make your RSVP deadline today… I love her to death and I am upset with Fiance for not sending it when he said he would but sometimes that blond hair just makes me want to scream. Plus we’re really good friends, we talk about every other to every 3 days and I just felt kind of judged by getting a group facebook message about it.
Post # 9
I agree that there’s no need to go into all the detail, and the phone is the best way to reach people in a hurry. Even if they don’t pick up, most people I know are better about answering voicemails then emails. Calling with a quick “hey, didn’t get your RSVP, are you going to be able to make it?” is perfectly fine!
Post # 10
I probably wouldn’t go into that much detail but something more than just “Hey where’s your RSVP?” I wouldn’t really mention the card at this point.
I’d say something like:
Hey there! I’m just checking in to see if you and (whoever is in their family) will be attending the wedding on June 19th. We’d love to see you! The venue needs a head count so everyone has a seat and enough to eat. 🙂
If you could please let me know ASAP, even if you are unable to make it. Thanks so much!
Post # 11
I agree with camrie- keep it simple and friendly.
Post # 12
You can send a follow up e-mail or call. but I would just say along the lines of,
“Hey I am following up on some last minuet RSVP’s. Will you be able to attend the wedding?”