Weddingbee boards

I'm stressing out because I don't know where we should get married!!! We have had kind of a long engagement, during the course of which we've considered many different options, and now that we're beginning to need to figure out details... I have no idea!

These are the things to consider: My parents want us to get married in a church. I want to find a small setting because I want an intimate wedding, but I also want ways to rationalize not inviting everyone and their dogs, and I'd rather have a small venue for a small group, anyway. Additionally, I'd like for my FI and me to pay for everything ourselves, so we're thinking we might do a late evening wedding and just have hors d'oeuvres instead of a full dinner. 

Also, although I love gardens, I'm wary about an outdoor wedding because I'm afraid that bugs/bad weather/my allergies/over-heating will strike! Yet I love waterfront, cityscape, or just natural views. I'm not really into princess themes or hotel things, I'm not a Vegas girl, and my FI and I aren't really beachy people-- not much into tanning (for us, burning-- ha ha) or swimming. I love simple, comfortable elegance with some vintage/antique-y features, and I love unique architectural features. I was thinking about doing a destination wedding to a place that is not too far away (ex: Vancouver Islands, Montreal, someplace in the United States?), but far enough away to deter too many guests. But I doubt we could find the money to visit in advance in addition to the wedding expenses, and without that, I can't scope out the locations well enough to know how they'd be. Errrrgg! 

In short, I'd like a location that is: intimate/small, hopefully involving a small church, not beachy, not too outdoorsy, not too far away, classy, comfortable, not too expensive... I'm stuck. Does anyone have any ideas? Ways of finding small churches/chapels or ideas for small venues or advice on Canadian destination weddings? Any help would be much appreciated!!  

I'm not sure where it is, but a friend of my brother is getting married at a gorgeous B&B or inn in a tiny town in the north of Vancouver Island, accessible by water airplane. :)

@SnowflakeDS: Ooh! If you hear where it is and how it went, I'd love to find out! :)