- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
Please help me – I want all your advice! I don’t have a Mother, a sister or even a FMIL to help/boss me around, and FI really has no opinion as long as I am happy, so I feel like I have nobody but you all to give suggestions, bounce ideas off of and get advice. On the flipside, I don’t have all sorts of family drama I read about on here so often – I don’t have to worry about anyone else’s opinions or guest list requests.
FI and I are in our late 30’s and neither of us have been married before. We would like nothing more than to have a wonderful ceremony and party that really feels like an event as special and important as it deserves to be. I want the traditional aspects of a wedding (walk down the aisle, cutting cake, first dance, etc.) I never thought planning a wedding would be so difficult for me. Here’s how it gets complicated for me. We both have very small families (between the two of us, we only have 2 family members who we really would like to be there). We could set our guest list anywhere between 14 of our nearest and dearest or 60 people. TO make it more complicated, of the 60 on the big list, all but 6 live out of state and would have to get on a plane to come up to us (if we get married in Washington where we live).
So, our big dilemmas are these:
#1 Super small wedding: if we go with a super small wedding (invite 14 people), what are some suggestions on how to make it feel like a special wedding, and not just another celebration, like a birthday party.
#2 Venue space: if we invite all 60 people, I am terrified that we get a venue for all 60 and considering everyone is out of state, only a handful can come, and our venue will seem empty. Or should we find a really small place and just invite the 14 or so we are sure would come? Any suggestions there?
#3 Location: Since everyone has to get on a plane anyway, should we do a destination wedding? We are not beach people, so we like the ideas of mountain lodge type places. But that’s where we live anyway, so might as well do it near our home. Most of the guests live in the same area (where we both grew up), so should we get married there? Any ideas of other types of destinations? Cruises? Speaking of home – we have thought about doing it in our backyard. Has anyone out there done a backyard wedding that felt like it wasn’t?
#4 Should we just elope? Does anyone have regrets from eloping?
I know that was a million questions, but I am really feeling lost lately. Thanks for all your help, Bees!