Post # 1
I am having a heck of a time with the seating chart. Part of the problem is, the “parents” table is short a person. We asked FI’s aunt to sit there, but she declined because she would rather be seated with her daughter. I don’t really know who else to put there? We have 168 people which is exactly 21 tables without a seat to spare. I’ve gone through the list trying to come up with a good arrangement at least 10 times and it always comes out with two people unseated.
Part of the problem is that I had it all worked out, and then we had a few last minute changes (cousin is now bringing her fiance, aunt’s husband is now not coming, different aunt’s husband IS coming, etc.) I’m thisclose to saying screw it and not having assigned seats.
Which do you prefer?
Post # 3
With no table openings, and if you and your fiance couldn’t logically put people together without having ppl left over, your guests on the day of will fare worse. It’s one thing to be an odd person out but at a weird table.. another to be the odd person out having to ask people you don’t know at the odd table if you can sit there. A little too confusing for me! Especially if you have a cocktail hour beforehand! I like to know where I’m going at weddings, I guess.
Post # 4
Considering how tight your guest to seats ratio is I think you’re going to have to struggle through the seating chart. It’s no fun but it will be even harder for your guests to sort out at the beginning of the reception.
Post # 5
Can you add one more table and then have a few of the other tables that aren’t totally full. We ended up having a couple mroe tables than we absolutely needed in order to accomodate convenient seating groups. The other girls are correct in saying that if you can’t figure it out in an organized manner then your guests will have a miserable time of it.
Post # 6
I can’t add one more table. I wish I could! I already rented the linens and gave the final # of centerpieces to the florist, and I’m hand-dyeing table runners and using my collection of vintage vases. I’d have to REALLY luck out finding a similar vase at the thrift store. Like I said before, everything was figured to a T and then we had a bunch of last-minute changes.
I think I will soldier on with the assigned seats. My Aunt is the one who’s husband cancelled, so she’s getting bumped to the parents table, odd as that may be. And unfortunately, a single coworker may get stuck with people she doesn’t know. It’s just for dinner, right? I mean, I am never too concerned with where I am seated because I dance and mingle the whole time after dinner anyway.
Post # 7
I think it depends on how well your guests know each other, too. We are having a very large wedding, but we are not doing a seating chart because most of our guests know each other. Plus, assigned seating at weddings around here just doesn’t happen, so people would probably be more confused if we did a seating chart. Talk with some of your guests, talk with your family, see what people prefer. It’s easy for the wedding to instill an over-planning sense in people, where everything needs to be perfectly planned. But the truth is, on the day of you’ll probably be missing some guests, and some extras will show up that “thought” they rsvp’d yes. I’m not saying anything negative about seating charts, I know I’m in the minority on this site in not having one, but I totally understand some situations where they are necessary, but not everyone’s situation fits the bill. Trust your judgment and talk to your guests, only they can give you truly accurate feedback.
Post # 8
could you move the extra chair to the table your aunt’s daughter is at? so you’d have a 7 person table and a 9 person table?
Post # 9
I had an assigned seating chart but didn’t have the same number of people sitting at the tables. The tables had anywhere from 7-10 seated. I grouped more of my younger friends at tables together since I figured they would mingling around and had fewer numbers sitting at our family tables. It all worked out in the end. Is your aunt’s daughter young and small? If so just make that one table a little fuller that the others.
Post # 10
- Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden
I would definitely do assigned seating, especially if it’s already complicated for you! I agree with @melissabegins – I like to know where I’m sitting and that I won’t be scrambling for a seat, possibly without my friends, come reception
Post # 11
Ha, FI’s aunt’s daughter is like 30 with a kid of her own. I asked the venue if we could have more than 8 people per table and they said it would be really cramped and would only work if the extra person was a lap child.
We did end up figuring something out. My single Aunt is at the parents table and my coworker is with some relatives of mine she doesn’t know, but they’re close in age and fun.
Post # 12
You can usually fit one extra person at a table for 8 without much trouble. I say make your aunt who turned down your parents table offer the 9th person at her daughter’s table, and let your parents have a table of 7.
edit: oops, just saw your update. Glad it worked out!
Post # 13
I hate not having assigned seating! I think your seating plan sounds like it will work. Just let your cousins know to look out for your coworker.
Post # 14
In my opinion, if you leave seating open, people will only sit with those they want to or know. Then the room is divided, no one is mingling, and then you’re thought of as patrial by spending more time on one side of the room than the other lol. Seating chart is rough, but the best option I think.
Post # 15
Talk to your venue. A table for 8 can easily become a table for 9. We were told we had to have tables of 12 but when our count came in and we found out we had 3 people over for our set # of tables our venue manager told us that she could easily adjust the table sizes for us, so we have mostly tables of 12 but one of 9, one of 13 and one of 14 so that we could squeeze everyone in. Especially if you really just need to add one more person to a table they should be able to help you.
Open seating, especially if you need every seat in the house can be awkward for your guests. Imagine the one single coworker you mentioned standing there trying to figure out where to go! Help a girl out! You can do it!
Post # 16
i used to be upset when at a table with people i didn’t want to be with. but after going through putting seating together, i will never complain again. it’s hard! pretty much impossible to make everyone happy. we finally decided not to stress, people will have to live where they get sit. and if they don’t like it, they can move themselves somewhere else. i wouldn’t ask people where they want to sit, just put them there.