Which wedding should we go too?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Which one should we go too?
    Cousin : (4 votes)
    4 %
    Friend : (95 votes)
    96 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2063 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    Absolutely go to your friend’s wedding. I wouldn’t miss a friend’s wedding that I had previously commited to for a cousin I am not close with, ESPECIALLY if they’re having a reception later in the year. They gave you NO notice about this wedding so it obviously wasn’t that important to them that you show up.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2565 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    You have already RSVP’d to your friend’s wedding so I think you should go to that one.  Sending out a text message for a wedding (even a casual one) with that little notice they have to expect some people may alreay have made plans.  Especially if they are having a second reception at Christmas that you will be able to attend.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1634 posts
    Bumble bee

    It’s DH’s family, if he’s ok with missing it, go to your friends wedding! You already RSVP’d and this was a last minute text. They know that most people will not be able to come. Go celebrate with your friends!

    Post # 7
    Member
    11668 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    You already committed to your friends wedding, so that is the one you should go to.  Also, the decision should really be your DHs I think since it’s his cousin.  

    Post # 8
    Member
    1106 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I would just emphasize that you will be attending the reception later on in the year and that you already have committed to another wedding– you can’t help that the notice they gave you was so short!

    Post # 9
    Member
    42510 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    The polite thing to do is always to honor the commitment you made first. It is unfortunate that the weddings are the same day, but you are already busy on the day your cousin is getting married.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1179 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    go to the friends wedding since you’ve already RSVP’ed

    Post # 11
    Member
    3344 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

    You already committed to going to your friend’s wedding, and your DH obviously cares more about that one anyway.

    Post # 12
    Member
    6964 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @MrsBeck:  

    Your friend took the time to actually send you an invitation, which you responded to over a month ago vs. his aunt sent you a text a few weeks before.

    This is your friend’s big day vs. the cousin will have a reception later.

    It’s your FI’s cousin and he wants to go to the friend’s wedding vs. you think you should go to the cousin’s because of your relationship with your cousins, which has nothing to do with your FI’s relationship with his. 

    Friend’s wedding wins. Send the cousin a card or have flowers or something shipped to congratulate them. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    681 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I agree with PP’s; you can certainly honor the commitment you already made to your friends and attend that wedding.  With such short notice – and the fact that you were invited by TEXT MESSAGE rather than by a phone call or physical invitation – you can’t be expected to attend. 

    Attending the reception at Christmas will be more than enough!

    Post # 14
    Member
    7531 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    This: “If you guys can make it into town we would love if you came!” -Sounds like they realize that it may not be possible,  you’ve already RSVP’d to the other wedding, 
    and “They will be having a reception a couple days after Christmas (which we will be in Wisconsin for)”  So really -no big tough decision.  

    Post # 15
    Member
    1304 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Another vote for the friend’s wedding.

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