who asks who to be in the wedding party

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
296 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - White Point Garden, Charleston, SC

You could always ask him together since he’s your friend, but you want him standing on your FI’s side.  I think that’s a good plan.

Post # 5
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

You should ask him to stand on your side, and your FI should ask his sister to stand on his side.  He’s your friend, you want him in the wedding party for you, he should be on your side, not his just because he is a man.

Post # 6
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013 - Callanwolde Fine Arts Center

Honestly, I don’t know why you wouldn’t just put him on your side and your FI’s sister on his side. Unles your FI is really close with your BFF, it seems like it wouldn’t be the same.

If you really want him on your FI’s side, just ask him together, but be prepared with a legitimate reason when he or his wife asks why he isn’t on your side.

Post # 8
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@AndysCraftsNmore:  bridal attendants don’t all have to be female, and groom attendants don’t all have to be male.  They don’t all have to match and have equal numbers on each side.  But if you can’t get past that you could still ask your friend (since the only reason you want him in the wedding is because he is your friend) to be a groomsmen.

FSIL could wear the same dress as the bridesmaids but get it in black/grey/whatever colour suit the groomsmen are wearing and stand with her brother.  Your friend could wear a tie/vest that is the same colour as your bridesmaids and the groomsmen wear a different colour.  That way everyone still looks like the go together and are part of the bridal party even though you have mixed genders on each side.

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