Post # 1
Im sure I’m not the only woman in the world with this issue so I’ll ask what other brides did. I’m trying to figure out who I can have walk me down the aisle. My dad passed away a few years ago. I have no brothers, my grandpas are all passed and I have no close uncles or other close guy relatives or friends to do it. I was thinking of maybe having my mom do it but when I mentioned it she seemed like she didnt really want to and thought it be really weird. anyone else do that? Or would it be ok to just walk alone? My dress is kinda poofy so maybe that would be better. Idk.
Plus since I ovibously wont be having a “father-daughter” dance I was planning on doing a “mother-daughter” dance. Anyone ever see that before? Anyone have suggestions for songs?
Post # 3
I am honored to be walking my daughter down the aisle, but it seems fitting because I have raised her since the age of three. Her father is no longer alive, but would not have been invited if he were living. I hope your mom comes to see this as the honor it is, but if she’s uncomfortable in that role, you and your groom could walk in together, or you could walk alone and focus on his face waiting for you at the altar. We haven’t agreed on mother/daughter dance song yet, but I think we’re going to do one. My vote goes to “Freeze Frame Time” by Brandon Rhyder, because it has always reminded me of her: “You are an angel, you taught me how to fly, you picked me up when I was down and you made me fly high. We’re a little bit older now, together we’ve seem some change, but I love you more now than I did on that very first day. Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry, some days it’s hard to figure out our way in this life. But it’s moments like this that make me wish I could freeze frame time.” The other choice would be “Find Your Wings” by Christian singer Mark Harris, but I don’t think there’s any way I could get through that one without doing the ugly cry.
Post # 4
@TexasAggieMom: Just reading your post made me want to cry! My mom raised me alone too, since my parents got divorced when I was three.
@jbbs1222: Would you be comfortable walking down the aisle alone? I agree that walking down the aisle with your groom could be a really nice alternative, and a bit less daunting than walking alone. Hopefully your mom will come around if you talk to her about it, express how important and special it would be for you.
My dad is passed too (not that I would have him walking me down the aisle anyway) but I’m having my stepfather do it instead.
Post # 5
Thanks for the suggestion. The only wedding I’ve ever seen with a mom walking the bride was on the show Dr. Quinn but I always thought it was sweet. lol. Even if my dad was alive I’m not sure if I would have him do it. My parents split a year before he died and we didnt get along cause he was the very verbally/mentally abusive type. I’m still doing a little memorial thingy for him at the wedding that I got a corsage thing with a little picture of him that I’ll have on the gift table or something. Anyway, I’ve never heard of either of those songs but they sound pretty. Wish I could do what my cousin did at her recent wedding. Her dad actually wrote their father/daugther dance and had a friend who does record stuff put music to it with him singing. it was so beautiful it had the whole room crying.
I don’t think I like the idea of walking in with my FI. I always pictured walking down the aisle towards him. Plus my FMIL has her heart set on him walking her in. He suggested maybe having his dad walk me but I’m honeslty not that close with him and that just seems weird to me. I think he should walk with them. Next problem is if I do choose to walk alone, then who walks my mom? Do I just have an usher friend do that?
Post # 6
@jbbs1222: I am truly sorry about your loss. My father passed away last year, and I’m having a hard time thinking about him not being present at my wedding.
I’ll just address your questions in bullets:
- My mother will be escorting me down the aisle (my original plan was to have both parents walk me down). If she doesn’t (since she’s also not too keen on the idea), then I will be walking down by myself. I am sewing a part of my father’s favorite handkerchief on the inside of my dress and I am carrying a small memento of his in my bouquet. So, it’s like he is walking me down (sounds corny, I know). I have a brother/uncles/cousins who could walk me, but then that would feel like a “replacement” and I personally choose not to do that.
- Yes, I think it is perfectly fine to walk down the aisle alone, but this depends on your comfort level.
- I am foregoing the parent-child dance entirely, since dancing was a very special, near-and-dear thing that my father and I shared. We had previously discussed exactly how the dance would go, and dancing with my mum would just not be the same to me (even though I love her unconditionally).
- I think that having a mother-daughter dance is perfectly lovely, if that is what you want (and no one would think it’s odd, esp. since as your guests, they would be familiar with your situation). It’s actually more common than you think (see: this video).
- As for song recommendations, the ones posted by @TexasAggieMom are all great. Also, you can check out these threads/posts: Bee Blog, Thread 1, Thread 2, Thread 3.
Post # 7
@jbbs1222: If your mom doesn’t feel comfortable walking you down she could totally do a mother daughter dance with you. A family friend of mine walked with her mom & only uncle (her dad died when she was little.) She also had a mother daughter dance to Carrie Underwood “Mama’s song” and it was very sweet!
Post # 8
Agreeing with other bees about walking down the aisle alone. I hope your mother changes her perspective on walking you down the aisle (I feel that would be very sweet). But walking down the aisle alone wouldn’t be too bad either. You can watch FI’s face without being too distracted 🙂
Post # 9
I think I like the idea of me just walking alone. Then all eyes are on me. Not trying to sound narcissistic here. Just my moms dress is bright red so yeh, thats gonna draw some attention. lol.
And i just listened to Mamas song. I honestly didnt care for it one bit. The lyrics were nice but its too fast and I personally am not a fan of carrie underwood.
Post # 10
If it gets approved by my minister, my mom will walk me down the aisle because my father was never around.
It’d be so cool if your mother-daughter dance was some choreographed little number, with you and her dancing side by side instead of holding each other.
Post # 11
you could also walk together with your groom
Post # 12
I’ll either walk by myself or have my dog walk me down the aisle. I’m really close to my dog and treat him like a little brother.
Post # 13
@fzesguer Were both chubby people. no way am i getting her to do a choreographed dance. lol
@greymonkey42 i like the dog idea. thats cute! pretty sure they wouldnt allow our dog in at our venue but thats cure idea.