Post # 1
We are having a family debate on who gets invited to the rehearsal dinner. So who are you inviting to your reheasal dinner? Do people get to bring guests?
Currently the winning argument is wedding party and their SOs, the officiant, our parents and siblings. Our parents siblings, and out of town cousins. In-town cousins not invited. This is 75 ppl and it seems like a lot.
Post # 3
75 people does sound like a lot to me. We had around 35. We invited:
1. Wedding party and if they had a SO/Spouse
2. Family – Groom’s immediate, My immediate
4. Any out of town guest who arrived the day we had the rehearsal dinner which was in the hotel we were all staying at.
5. OOT cousins – only because their parents were doing a reading and my one cousin designed our invites. Otherwise, they would not have been invited.
Post # 4
Basically we invited whatever number came out to about 35 people because that was the size we were going for. This includes the bridal party and their SOs and family. We are not inviting all the out of towners because that would more than double the guestlist.
Post # 5
immediate family and people participatning in the wedding are the only “required” inivitees. could you cut your parents’ siblings and OOT cousins if you need to keep the budget lower? that or have a pizza party or bbq at someone’s house.
Post # 6
We didn’t even invite out of town guests, there were too many… It was both of our immediate families, the wedding party and their SO’s. We had 30, had we invited all OOT guests it would have been about 75.. The rehearsal dinner is suppose to be small and intimate if you ask me. Neither of our parents invited their siblings and none of our cousins were invited.. But, we did have reservations at a bar afterwards for a table that all the OOT guests, etc went to and my Dad paid for a few hundred dollars worth of drinks there after the dinner…
Post # 7
I think that we had around 60.
-Wedding party and their significant others
-Family- immediate and extended (this was super important to my inlaws)
-Officiant and his wife (they are family friends)
-Our reader and her husband
-Friend who was my DOC for free and her husband
-A few special OOT guests (FIs best friend is deployed so we asked his parents and girlfriend to come to dinner, close family friends of my inlaws who traveled far)
Post # 8
I was always under the school of thought the the RD is only for those that are actually a part of the wedding (i.e. those who participate in the rehearsal, go to the rehearsal dinner w/ the participants guests) So this would be immediate families, wedding party and their dates, and anyone else who is part of the wedding.
But, some people believe that all out of town guests must be invited too.
Post # 9
@annieAAA me too! So I’m a bit baffled about this huge event especially since I was hoping for a wedding of 75 ppl. haha but like @lampshade said it is important to my in-laws to invite all OOT guests. I think we would need to do the actual rehearsal before the dinner and then go to the dinner. I guess since its important to my in-laws and they are paying Ill just let them invite whoever.
Post # 10
There are no real rules about who to invite – its whatever works best for you.
We fought tooth and nail over this with my ILs for what seemed like months. THey thought we should invite all OOT guests and we thought we should just invite family and bridal party. In the end we ended up inviting all of our guests to our RD and I am SO glad that we did!! We had about 90 people at our RD and it was so much fun. It also gave me an opportunity to see people more. I felt less obligated to go around to everyone at the wedding because I was able to spend a significant amount of time with everyone the night before!
ETA – if we had just invited OOT guests it would have been about 95% of our guest list anyways so thats why we just invited everyone. Only a handful of people were considered “in town” (aka didnt have to drive more than an hour to get there)…everyone else had to fly or drive several hours (at least 5+) to get there. Even thought we fought about this I am so happy with the decision we made because it was less stress on us at our reception!
Post # 11
I know that I am going to have the bridal party and their significant others, immediate family members (brothers, sisters, parents, grandparents) and those from out of town.
If you have close friends that may not be in the wedding, but you still want them to come, I don’t see anything wrong with that 🙂
Post # 12
I know this thread is old but I have to start planning this… So far we have the wedding party and their so’s, my parents, his parents and step parents. Since it’s a Mass, do we also invite the readers and who is offering the gifts up? Do they need to be at the rehearsal at all? If so then I will invite them to the dinner. Without the readers included it’s going to be a total of 22…