Post # 1
So for my Rehearsal/Dinner afterwards, I was curious to know if it is OK not to invite spouses/bf/gf of the wedding party? I wanted to keep it as just wedding party, immedate family and his immediate family… We have a list of 40+ people already not including guest of the bridal party….
My family consists of: 10 brothers and sister(their 10 spouses), 12 nieces and nephews, my mom
His family: has: his mom, dad, 2 brothers/2wives, his grandma and 1 aunt
totals 41 for just that. I do not want it to be a mini reception, you know what I mean? Our wedding is only 115 people! My family and his family are definates, i would never cut them off so I could put someone who probally doesnt want to be there on the list.
Then we have 6 people in the wedding (the others are my silbings) 4 of which are married.. I do not know the one groomsman wife (they just got married recently, and I wasn’t invited to theirs)..
My friend told me it was rude, yet when it was her wedding and I quote she didn’t let anyone bring guest because she wasn’t giving “anyone a free meal that wasn’t needed” lol
Post # 3
Are all of your family members IN the wedding – or participating in some way?
I ask because we only invited people who were IN our wedding to the rehearsal (and their spouses/dates) – otherwise it would have been a huge event. We really wanted it to be intimate.
Here’s an idea, since your family is so big, your family must be used to pitching in to help eachother with events like this. Could you ask your sibs to contribute something and do a potluck style dinner? That way everyone could come and it wouldn’t be so costly.
Post # 4
- Wedding: May 2011 - Bartram's Garden
We’re having a small wedding party so it’s not that many people. Maybe 20 or so.
The boy’s three brothers (his groomsmen) and their wives
My sister and her boyfriend
The boy’s parents
The boy’s two grandmothers and his great aunt (only because they’re traveling from a distance to be there)
My two other bridesmaids (neither one is in a serious relationship so no dates will be invited.
Our officiant (who is our close friend) and his fiance
Post # 5
All my family has been contributing something to the wedding…..My family is my rock.. We have been through the worst of times togehter, my fathers death and now its time to be together as a family, go out somewhere nice and just celebrate a happy event, which will be an actual traditional wedding that we hadn’t had since before my dad passed away 🙁 But your idea does sound fantastics, I wish that could work, I just dont want anyone to have to worry about fixing things up or finding a place.. so they can go an enjoy like the rest =) so that’s why we are trying to go out and enjoy ourselves ya know what I mean? I kind of think it would be more intimate with people I love then people I had to invite just because people complained they couldn’t bring their date…. Other keep calling me rude because I won’t let them bring someone.. but I can’t help it, why have people I really do not want and won’t mean as much to me? I hope that made sense 😛
Post # 6
I hate to say it, but I think it is rude not to invite the husband/wife of wedding party members to the rehearsal dinner. I realize this bumps up your numbers, but if you were in the wedding party and married and your spouse wasn’t invited you’d probably feel hurt. Also if the bridal party members don’t really know your family, they will be much more comfortable with their spouses present. I know you don’t know the spouses or feel a personal connection to them, but it would be a common courtesy to invite them to the dinner.
Post # 7
Well here is the kicker, when they all had theirs, I couldn’t bring my fiance! So that is more or less why im leaning towards not letting them come also now.
Post # 8
We’re inviting about 125-150 people to the wedding, and for about 80% of them, the wedding is out of town. I know traditionally when it comes to the rehearsal dinner you’re supposed to invite family and out of town guests. In my case, we’re only going to have our immediate family, grandparents, bridal party, and coordinator. That alone gives us 30 people.