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I guess anyone who wanted to go in there... I've never really thought about it but neither one of us is particularly concerned about it.
Due to our crazy ass apartment layout, to get to the bathroom you have to go through the bedroom - - so pretty much anyone who has to pee.
@guitargirl: We just moved into our first place together so we are always showing people around and so we show them but the only person other than us who has ever been in there longer than just to be shown, is my MOH when she spent the night on halloween. But other than that, it's just us.
We recently moved into a new home, and we show everyone the entire house. We've never talked about it before, but like if our nephews are over and they run into our room and jump on the bed, it doesn't bother us, or if our friends need privacy to breastfeed during a party, etc...
If someone wanted to see the bedroom who had never been over before, I would let them see it, but that's really it. Otherwise its just a private space for the two of us.
@guitargirl:Ok I'm going to assume you mean friends or family. In terms of people who can be in our bedroom it's pretty much anyone. People don't typically go in there but that is because it is small and there would be no reason to hang out in there. If I had something to show someone or bought a new piece of clothing I would ask them to come in.
If you mean who do you invite into your bedroom sexually (because my mind is a gutter) then that would be a very different answer.
It's pretty much open to everyone especially since the computer is in there.
We live in an open concept loft. Pretty much the whole place is open to our bedroom, so anyone who comes over is welcome in there. Obviously, this doesn't bother us.
Good question...FI and I don't currently live together but once we do, it will be mainly us allowed in our bedroom. Even though it's just me and my daughter in my home, she knocks and waits for permission before coming in my room. That's my safe haven and I really don't want anybody wallowing, snooping, getting comfortable in my private space. Even when my mom comes to stay with my daughter when I am out of town she sleeps in the guest room. My siblings and I weren't allowed in my parents room unless we were taking something in there, or one of them asked us to go get something. I've adopted the same attitude.
I guess we don't really have anybody in there. We have the main spaces and also a spare guest bedroom, so there wouldn't ever be a need for a guest to go in our bedroom. We have our second bathroom ensuite off the master, but you have to go through our closet to get to it, so I don't like people using it, unless they REALLY REALLY have to pee.
Nope. Bedroom is for me and FI only. I'm really weird about privacy. We have a whole apartment for people to hang in, they don't need to be in our bedroom. I have never owned a studio due to my weird privacy issues. I also refuse to rent an apartment with the bathroom attached the bedroom as @Lindsay12.31.2010 described.
That being said, this is something that FI knows I feel strongly about, so he would never let guests into the bedroom without asking me about it first.
We don't have anything sitting out in the bedroom that I need to worry about people seeing but if they started going through my drawers I would be upset!
@TinyTina: At first I didn't think it would bother me, but it is totally awkward. Sometimes DH has poker night, and I will go to sleep before him. Kind of uncomfortable to have someone walk through to go the bathroom while I am sleeping, LOL. Luckily we move in September.
i don't like people in my bedroom, or my bathroom for that matter, without knowing ahead of time. i'd like to think that someday we will be neater people, and that then i won't mind, but i doubt it!
@Lindsay12.31.2010: Yep, we saw a few apartments that had that layout. Even though some of them were really nice I just couldn't get over my privacy issues, so they immediately got crossed off the list.
I spent too many years in studio apts. or as a flatmate where my bedroom was my entire and only space to be any more worried about people being in there vs. any other part of my house. I'm private and don't love company, period. But if I do have guests, we're likely to end up in the bedroom as it contains the only TV in the house.
Our bedroom is always pretty clean (I make the bed everyday) so I don't really have a problem if people are in there. The only time that anyone ever goes in our bedroom is if they have to use the master bathroom if the hall bath is occupied. This doesn't happen very often but when it does, I don't really have a problem with it.
I don't really mind people going in there as long as it's neat and tidy!
I keep the bedroom door firmly closed when we have people over. I have definite privacy issues. I used to not even really like having people in my apartment, period; thankfully I've gotten over that one, but I still consider our bedroom as off-limits to anyone except FI and I.
I definitely like the idea of keeping the bedroom private - I guess you could say it is our private space.
Our place is open concept so anyone who comes over goes "in" the bedroom. I doubt I'd care, regardless, it's just another room to me.
i lived in studios for years, but now that i have a 1-bedroom, the bedroom is my safe haven. it's just for me, fi, and our pets.
@Lindsay12.31.2010: Our apartment is the same way! It doesn't really bother us, except for the fact we have two kids and it'll be great to get a place where they won't be coming into the bedroom to get to the bathroom.
Whenever we have friends over, I go on a cleaning-spree and either put away everything or hide it in the closet or under the bed, lol.
The question hasn't ever come up, but I'm pretty sure we'd both rather have it where no one but us and our closest friends/family are allowed into the bedroom.... preferably just us & the kids (after they knock/ask and are escorted, of course).
Anyone can come into my bedroom. I'm not a private person, so it's not a big deal if my FI brings someone into the bedroom.
FI's and my apartment is a studio style, and the bedroom is totally open to view from the living room, but guests wouldn't HAVE to go in it for any reason, unless they were going in there. I really don't care, as long as they don't go through any of our stuff.
The only awkward thing is our walk in closet is actually the old entrance to the house! So, sometimes when people come over for the first time and don't know where our real front door is, they go to the front door of the house... and walk into our closet. :)
ETA: I do, however, have issues with other people sleeping in our bed. FI is the only one who sleeps in it now, since we aren't living together yet, and I would feel weird about letting guests sleep there if they ever stay over once we are living together. We're definitely getting a guest bed!
I'm ok with anyone in the bedroom. If I'm going to have company over I'll make the bed and pick up FI's clothes that he leaves out, but I normally don't leave anything out anyways since I changed and everything in my closet connected to the bathroom.
Good question. I don't live with my fiance so I can't really answer it. But I know a lot of people who see the room is just theirs, and don't let others in. I'm always conscious of this when I go to people's houses. I try not to go near their bedroom and just stay in common areas. It's weird to me when I go into the bedroom, not sure why though.
Anyway, I would just talk to your fiance about it. Maybe he can put a rug down in the living room or something.
I don't mind people seeing our bedroom as long as it's tidy. We leave the door open when we have company over. Our big screen and surround sound are in our bedroom anyways so sometimes we'll invite our friends over for a movie night (:
The bedroom is just for us, especially with teenagers in the house. But it is also the place where we keep the firearms so it is also key locked when we are not home. We don't want to risk curious teenagers going through "our" private things.
No one, not even the dog is allowed in the bedroom. If the maintenance guys have to install something, DH will do it while they wait outside the door :) It is private.
We just moved and had a huge house warming so we showed the entire house to everyone, so after that there is really no need for anyone to go up stairs, we have 4 bath, so they can go to the bath off the family room on the bath in the rec room. So to answer your question. NO!
Normally I've been taught to avoid master bedrooms in houses because they really are a private space. But my boyfriend's uncle (who is really like another father) uses his bedroom as a gathering space for the family. Aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews. Everyone gathers in the bedroom and around the bed to talk and socialise. It takes some getting used to.
I think that in this case it's all about comprimise. It's not like they were on the bed watching TV or anything. As for your laundry, I'm sure it wasn't even noticed.
When we first got our house, we showed it to everyone too, but it was "ready" to be shown. If we have company over now, we leave the bedroom door open, but no one has ever really gone into it for any reason. It's upstairs anyways, but so is FI's "man room". Luckily there is a bathroom right across the hall from it that guests can use. I'd probably feel pretty invaded if someone just walked into the bedroom.
I never even thought of this! Like a few of you, anyone who uses our bathroom needs to walk through the bedroom. I grew up with 4 brothers and sisters, and then went to college with my (awesome, but nosy) roommates. I guess I wouldn't know what privacy was if it kicked me in the butt! :)
@Beluga: Ditto! With 4 kids in one house, I was lucky to have my own bed when I got to middle school, and I only ever had my own room once i moved to college. In college, I lived with close family friends, and the husband had just had a serious back injury involving surgery and being laid up for 2 years. The only way to visit was in their room, and since there was just one chair, it was common for 3 people just rest on the bed to visit and watch TV with him while one sat in the chair. Since my extended family (and Mr.ND's) are rather large, most gatherings end up with the kids playing in various bedrooms while adults visit in the kitchen and living room.
I do say, though, that if me and Mr.ND are in our room, I expect people to knock and wait, and my kids will learn that as well. But beyond that, I'm totally fine coming in and visiting with people in their room or having them visit in mine.
Only if you're invited (or you need to use the toilet and the other one's in use) and only if it's clean! I could see myself having a friend over and having to fold some laundry or something or us getting ready to go out and using my bedroom area or us trying on some dresses or something to go out in. But my mom helped herself to putting stuff away in our bedroom when she came to visit last year and i felt...violated I guess.
Only if you are invited.
As I do not have a studio, lounge or 'own room' in the house, or bedroom is my safe space, and usually the last place that I clean, so yeah. If the door is closed, don't come in. If I don't explicitly invite you in, don't come in.
Hell, you know what, unless you're here in 3.5 years viewing the house when we're trying to sell it, don't come in :)
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FH and I have very different views on privacy, which sparked a debate. Do you ever invite people into your bedroom or is it a "strictly just the two of you" space? Who is allowed and what would the circumstances be?
ETA: FH had a friend over while I wasn't there. (He told me before, this wasn't behind my back.) He needed a carpeted area to work on her shoulder (long story, he's in healthcare, just trust me on this), and the only two areas in our house that fit the bill were our bedroom and the basement. He picked our bedroom since our basement is a little cold. I am a very private person and don't like anyone in our bedroom unless they have to be or a quick tour. This was worse since I often have clean clothes out on the dresser and several bras and panties were out in plain view.