Who does he greet first – me or my Dad?!

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Who should he greet first?
    Shake my Dad's hand and then take mine and kiss me : (47 votes)
    90 %
    Give me a kiss and then shake my Dad's hand : (5 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    356 posts
    Helper bee

    @Hislittlebee:  I’d have him greet your dad. It shows more respect with him handing you away

    Post # 4
    Hostess
    9919 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @Hislittlebee:  I think he’s supposed to greet your dad first.  The tradition is that your dad is giving you to him, he would have worked things out with your dad and now your dad is presenting you…hence ‘giving you away’

    Post # 5
    Member
    8914 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    Hmmm – would your fiance kiss you right when you get up there?  I don’t think I’ve ever seen that… seems like you should save the kiss until the “I now pronounce you husband and wife” thing.  I think we just grabbed hands and grinned a bunch.

    Post # 7
    Member
    7179 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @Hislittlebee:  since your dad is giving you away, it would be proper for him to greet you.  Also, usually a kiss on the lips is reserved for after you are pronouced man and wife.  In all the weddings I’ve attended, I’ve never seen a couple kiss on the lips until the end of the ceremony (although, I  understand how the default instinct would be to kiss when you see him!)

    Post # 8
    Member
    7208 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @Hislittlebee:  I don’t think he did either! As I came down the aisle my father was on my left arm and my DH was on my right. So I was between the two and I think it would have been awkward for DH to reach across me and shake my father’s hand.

    Anyway, ask your celebrant. It’s the sort of thing that can be sorted out during the rehearsal, no need to worry about it until then.

    Post # 9
    Member
    10748 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    He shook my dad’s hand and then we went up to the front together.

    Post # 10
    Member
    8914 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    @Hislittlebee:  I totally understand, we always do little pecks too and so we had to restrain ourselves!  Anyway, just my 2 cents.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1103 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    My sister and hubby moved in to kiss and the officiant cleared his throat and motioned not to!!  It’s a tradition thing apparently!!

    Post # 12
    Member
    568 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    Yeah you’re not supposed to kiss until the proclamation. Maybe a kiss on the cheek or forehead, but not the lips. My FI is not going to greet my dad at all, when we reach the end of the aisle, the preacher will ask, “Who gives this woman to this man?” and my dad will answer, “Me and her mother do,” then my dad will lift my veil and kiss my cheek, then he will take my hand from his arm and place it in FI’s hand, effectively “giving me away” then take his seat as i take my place before the altar.

    Post # 13
    Member
    1566 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Order of operations as I understand it:

    1. Dad lifts veil (if you have a blusher) hugs you and kisses you on the cheek

    2. Dad and FH shake hands/greet

    3. FH and you greet

    4. On with the Show!

    Post # 14
    Member
    7654 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @Hislittlebee:  We didn’t do the kissing part because that’s left for the proclamation, he *hugged* my dad first and then took my hand and walked me up the steps.

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