Who had NO SAY in the ring?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Any of you letting SO handle the entire (choice of) ring?
    Yes - SO is doing it all alone : (48 votes)
    23 %
    Sort of - I gave him some hints and tips, but he is making the final decisions : (68 votes)
    32 %
    No - I wanted a say : (96 votes)
    45 %
  • Post # 3
    4041 posts
    Honey bee

    @mscuppycake:  I am no longer a waiting bee, but my FI picked out the ring on his own. I told him I liked white gold and didn’t want a high profile setting. He picked out a stunning solitaire diamond ring with a more modest profile setting.

    Post # 4
    8677 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    My husband did it all alone. He never asked me, and I never knew he was planning a proposal. We’ve both talked about replacing my engagement ring (Long story short, his mother talked him out of getting the ring he wanted to propose to me to, so he bought a plain, generic ring and in my husband’s eyes its a source of failure and disappointment) so I guess I’ll get a say in that. I don’t have a wedding band either, so I’ll get one of those, too.

    Post # 5
    1448 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @mscuppycake:  I’m already married but I had no clue my husband was even going to propose when he did so I had zero say on my ring.

    We both knew early on in our relationship that we were meant to be so I hhim told him, wayyyy back when we were only dating about 6 months or so, that if he got me a diamond that it better be perfect. I don’t care about the size, shape or anything. 

    So 2 years later, he pops the question in 4 feet of snow next to a frozen waterfall. I love that he picked this ring out on his own. That he went to all of these jewlery stores to try to find the one ring that was perfect for me. It honestly makes me love me ring even more. 

    Post # 6
    406 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I’ve given my SO hints about my sense of ring style, and we’ve looked at some rings to see what size of diamond and setting looks good on my finger. Now that we’ve done that, he’s made it very clear that I will not know when the proposal is coming. No hints, tips, acting weird, or anything. But I’m totally okay with that. I want to be surprised, and I don’t do well with surprises that i know are coming at some point in the future. So this way I won’t go as crazy with anticipation (hopefully)!

    Post # 7
    177 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    We have been together 4 1/2 years talking about getting  married for 2 we both decided I should have a say in the ring. Funny thing is is after the first time we went our to look his mother offerd us his grandmothers ring! It looked almost like every ring I looked at lol kinda like fate. He told me he would buy me a new setting but he would really like me to have his grandmothers dimond but I liked the setting so much I did not want to change it! So it needed needed some repair he had that done last week and picked it up friday! Now All i am doing is waiting for him to ask! So yes I had a say but I guess it was chosen for me a long time ago! I will post pics as soon as the ring is mine! 

    Post # 8
    140 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I wanted a vintage/vintage looking dainty ring and my husband had no idea what I meant by that. The first time we went to “look” and I fell in love with a ring. He bought it right then and there because he knew I had been looking since we started dating.

    Post # 9
    3112 posts
    Sugar bee

    @mscuppycake:  Ring board?

    DH and I picked out the ring together, but he was totally supportive of whatever I wanted.  He’s not really into my jewelry.  Same thing for my 5 year anniversary ring.  He just smiles and nods!

    Post # 10
    1234 posts
    Bumble bee

    @mscuppycake:  We’re in the (long!) process of ring shopping/saving. I don’t expect a proposal for at least a year. That said, we plan to have me send him a list of my favorite rings and he can choose from the list, pick a style similar to some on the list, or have a custom made ring.

    Post # 11
    257 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I had no idea he was planning on proposing because it was a good 6 months before I wanted to get engaged. Plus he had just returned from a deployment and spoiled me, so no say. He got the perfect ring however.

     The funny thing is when I met his grandma right before our wedding she said that she wished he had told her before he asked because he wanted him to have her wedding set (he’s the oldest, and the favourite).  I’m so glad he didn’t because they are not me at all.  Plus she’s the type who would have been livid if I had had them reset. 

    Post # 12
    389 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    @mscuppycake:  I made SO a pinterest board so that he could get some ideas. I am not too fussy when it comes to jewellery either. I totally trust his judgement though! He’ll do great!

    Post # 13
    50 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I had no say and I wouldn’t want it any other way!

    We both knew that we would be spending our lives together, but had never specifically talked about getting engaged and married. I never pushed the matter as we hadn’t been dating for that long and I didnt want him to feel pressured. I had an idea in mind of what I would want when the time came, and I am very fussy with jewellery, so I thought he would involve me when he was ready. 

    Turns out he had already thought about it months before, and wanted to surprise me for our first anniversary. I couldn’t have picked better myself, he did a wonderful job all on his own!

    Post # 14
    257 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    @mscuppycake:  I have no say in the ring choosing and it’s driving me nuts… I keep sending SO lots of links to amazing rings I like in the hope that he get’s the hint… He wants it to be a surprise though and likes to tease me so much with it. At least he seems somewhat interested in finding out more about diamonds ( I am teaching him all about the 4 Cs) and he asked wether I would want a bigger diamond with inclusions (let’s say a 2 carat /I2  or a smaller one with hardly any (0,8 carat /VVS1). He also knows that I would want any more colour higher than L (Top Cape) unless it’s in a yellow gold setting…. As mentioned before, I have no say and dislike it as I know far more about jewelry than him, have particular tastes and worry that he might get ripped off… 

    Post # 15
    752 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I told FH that it was very important that the diamond was conflict free, and that I liked thin bands with pave diamonds, and that was it. That’s the way I wanted it. I love that when I look down at my ring I see a generous gift and a surprise from him 🙂

    Post # 16
    2103 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @mscuppycake:  I’m not waiting, but he chose it all by himself. The only say I had was when I told a recently engaged friend that I don’t want a diamond, I want a colored stone.

    He googled “purple and green/teal stones” and ended up coming across Alexandrite.

    I adore what I have! 

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