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Wedding band dilemma!

Who handles the day to day?

posted 2 years ago in Newlyweds
  • poll:
    I do (or will do) it all : (18 votes)
    43 %
    he does (or will do) it all : (2 votes)
    5 %
    We each do (or will do) everything separately : (2 votes)
    5 %
    We split it up pretty evenly : (9 votes)
    21 %
    I do (or will do) our mutual bills, but we each handle some money separately : (3 votes)
    7 %
    he does (or will do) our mutual bills, but we each handle some money separately : (7 votes)
    17 %
    Other : (1 votes)
    2 %
  •  
    1.
    Hostess
    5,572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    LatteLove    June 19, 2009   Chicago/San Diego

    Just curious how you guys handle your daily finances...bill paying, check cashing, budget blanacing.

    I think it's pretty common for the woman to handle most of the bookkeeping in a household--but in my house my dad was an accountant, so he handled it all (and my mom was very grateful for it!)

    I'm the money-minded one at our house.  Hubby has no interest in worrying about account balances, online banking, bill pay, direct deposit, etc.  He just wants me to tell him where things are at, and we discuss the big things.

    I know a lot of couples nowadays handle their money more separately. So I'm wondering who handles the day to day bookkeeping?  Do you split it up? one handle more than the other?  Do neither of your worry about (set up online bill pay and stay hands off?)  Maybe you handle money separately if you live together pre-marriage, but it will change afterwards? please share!

     
    2.
    Hostess
    16,857 posts
    Honey
    Beekeeper
    MissAsB    June 6, 2009   Married in CO, Living in AL

    I am the money mind too.  We have all joint accounts and I know all of the account passwords for everything.  He knows some but he can't always remember so he has to ask me sometimes.

     
    3.
    Hostess
    5,534 posts
    Bee Keeper
    Mrs. Spring    May 10, 2009   California

    We having everything jointly, and my husband handles all the finances for our household.  He pays all the bills, watches the budget, and even regularly checks progress on our long-term investments and debts.  I prefer it this way.  :)  Honestly, he keeps me well-informed about what's going on, but he's really just more responsible with money than I am.  I am in charge of the dogs (vet/grooming appointments, new toys/ food, etc...), the social calendar, and I take on a lot of the responsibility of household chores (except for grocery shopping and meal planning), which are all things I'm a lot better at.

     
    4.
    Hostess
    10,729 posts
    Sugar
    Beekeeper
    crebre80    November 20, 2010   Baton Rouge, LA

    I am pretty sure it will be me just because M has forgotten things a few times (eh-heh) and it drives me crazy and stresses me out.

     
    5.
    Hostess
    8,491 posts
    Bumble
    Beekeeper
    Mrs. DG    July 18, 2009   Seattle/Tahoe

    We pay everything jointly, but I take care of the mortgage and he takes care of all the other bills.

    He does so much around the house, it makes me teary to think about it... but I think I'm more in charge of the social stuff day to day.  (I have to be pretty organized to keep track of my many job responsibilities etc).  And I love to cook for us!

     
    6.
    Hostess
    1,667 posts
    Bumble bee
    august15bride    August 15, 2009   St. Petersburg, FL

    @LatteLove: My dad is an accountant too so I grew up with the man of the house doing the finances!

    I always thought I would put my husband in charge, but I'm having a hard time relinquishing control!

     
    7.
    Member
    5,018 posts
    Bee Keeper
    RecessionistaBride    January 28, 2012  

    I will be incharge of it all. Anyway, he says once we're married he hopes to never deal with another bill again. That's fine by me, just hand over the paycheque! lol

    His only request is that he gets a weekly "allowance" essentially to play around with. That was his idea, not mine... it's his money too! As long as he respects the budget, I don't care if he spends money! He works hard for it. :)  

     
    8.
    Hostess
    5,572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    LatteLove    June 19, 2009   Chicago/San Diego

    @RececssionistaBride: my husband calls our fun money his "allowance".  It's so funny!  he asks if he mows the lawn and take out the garbage if he gets his allowance (just joking of course!)

    Right now we have pretty limited discretionary income because he's in school full time and I'm working, but we do have a little money to spend for ourselves.

     
    9.
    Hostess
    5,480 posts
    Bee Keeper
    Jessie516    May 16, 2009   Ann Arbor, MI

    We split everything pretty evenly.  We lived together before we got married, so for the most part, everything is still set up the same way.  We're each responsible for making sure our portions of joint bills are in the joint account for payments.  We each take care of our own individual credit cards and accounts on our own.  He deals with the insurance, but that's because it's through his job.

     
    10.
    Member
    408 posts
    Helper bee
    SuperBrook    5/7/2011   Kansas

    I had a hard time picking which one to vote on because our situation doesn't really fit.  We've been living together for a year and I really don't see the money changing after we say "I do". 

    He pays all the household bills, mortgage, utilities, ect.  He also pays his own car payment and insurance. 

    I pay my own car payment and insurance and for my daughter's needs.  I also pay him $500 a month in "rent."

    The combined things: I buy all the groceries and he pays all the checks when we go out to eat. 

    At some point between now and I Do I may stop calling it rent, but I doubt much else wil change with the arrangement.

     
    11.
    Member
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    hcritton    09/06/09   Seattle, WA

    I do all the bookkeeping :)

     
    12.
    14,581 posts
    Honey
    Beekeeper
    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    I do....mortgage, bills, etc, because I'm the one with the paycheck. He's been grabbing groceries lately though. But, the bills all come to me because they were all in my name when he was deployed. As soon as he gets a job and a paycheck, we're setting up a joint account.

     
    13.
    Member
    770 posts
    Busy bee
    sulaii211      

    I keep an eye on it, but we make most transactions and budgeting together. We have a joint account and seperate accounts as well, but we both have access to view each other's accounts- it's just easier that way.

    Being broke means there is nothing to hide. :)

     
    14.
    Member
    6,816 posts
    Busy
    Beekeeper
    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    Social calendar! It is so funny how much busier your life gets when you get engaged/married. There are at least twice the functions to keep track of. I think back to when I was single and I had no calendar. My plans were constantly up in the air and being made last minute. Now we have to coordinate everything, but I love it!

    Right now we split things evenly, but once we get married our finances will be combined and I'm assuming I will be the one to manage the day-to-day. FI has a finance degree, so he's going to invest our money, but I will still have some oversight to that.

     
    15.
    Member
    1,210 posts
    Bumble bee
    otb    December 31, 2009   Chicago, IL

    He deals with pretty much everything, the only things I am responsible for is paying my credit card.  Which is good, because I am terrible about remembering to pay things on time!  He usually says something to me about it at the end of the month, and I just pay it when he reminds me!  He's very open about everything, lets me know when he's paying each bill etc, and I do check the accounts online, so we're open about our finances, he just does the bill pay.  He was a finance major, so I let him handle the retirement stuff too.

     
    16.
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    Member
    122 posts
    Blushing bee
    LorennaL    LorennaL   Boston, MA

    We still keep most of our accounts separate, but we have a few shared accounts.  We use quickbooks to keep track of all our expenses, and we share the responsibility of entering all the information in. 

     

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