Post # 1
Simple enough haha Is there anyone (family or friend thats like family) who has been a problem during the planning process? Any crazy stories? How have you dealt with them?
My sister is now insisting she give a speech. (The last in a long line of insaneness from her) We dont want anyone but my brother to speak and I feel my sister doesn’t really know me. This was confirmed when yesterday, after over 5 years of being together and her spending five christmases with my FI and I, she had to ask what my FI last name was…..
My go to strategy is to just put my foot down and be as blunt as possible so there is no miscommunication but she said she will just stand up and give one anyway
I figure I cant be the only one with a crazy relative!
Post # 3
My FIL tried to pick our baker and florist.
Our baker came with the venue.
Picking our florist was especially insulting because he KNEW that I was planning on doing the flowers, since my Grandma used to let me help her at work… And she was a florist! So I had actual training in flower arranging.
Then post-wedding we got pregnant, and he called my DH upset because he was “convinced that (I’m) anorexic and harming (our) unborn child.”
Some people are just crazy!
Post # 4
My MIL was obsessed with buying expensive favors just because she found some that matched the invitations (don’t worry I didn’t let her get away with this). We only chose those invitations because they were 50% off!
Post # 5
My FMIL has been absolutely INSANE. SHe only has sons so I invited her to my first dress fitting. I live across the country from my family and my sister happened to be in town so I purposely made an appointment to try on dresses with her and invited FMIL too since she may not ever get to go dress shopping. On the day, my sister was taking pictures and sending to my mom so she could feel like she was there too. I tried on a bunch of dresses and didn’t find anything, all was fine. A few days later my FMIL TEXTS, not even calls my fiance and tell him how rude I was and ignored her and only spoke to my sister and how I purposely invited her to make her feel bad and excluded. She then goes on another rant about how we have taken her diamond (it was his grandmother’s and has been passed down generation to generation) and don’t appreciate it or her and to get out of her life and she wants nothing to do with us or our wedding.
This was 4 months ago and I have not found a dress I think dress shopping has been ruined for me. She has since apologized through an email but, for me it’s not really behavior I can fully forgive especially if she isn’t going to verbally apologize (in person or on the phone).
Post # 6
FIL…he wanted so much.
But it’s over and we’ve moved past it! 🙂
Post # 7
@BrandNewBride: WOAH that is insane!!!!! The baby thing is just mean!
@Aquaria: Hahahaha thats something my mom would do!
@Lbward6: Oh man is your FI the baby? Maybe she is snapping because she is freaking out about him being married? Still RIDICULOUS!
@notbridey: haha my FFIL is the quietest guy thankfully! I am glad you guys moved past it 🙂
Post # 8
@excitedtobeMRSF nope not the baby, he’s actually the oldest!
Post # 9
@excitedtobeMRSF: my crazy relative is my uncle. He pouted when I sent out our STD complaining that his children weren’t invited, which is my grown up cousin that I’m not at all close to and her baby daddy. I finally succumb to family pressure and invite him along with said cousin + baby daddy – and what does he do? Starts telling the family that neither him nor his daughter will be attending. Good riddance! There’s just no pleasing everyone…
Post # 10
My aunt. She was pissed off that I didn’t ask her daughter to be a bridesmaid. My (then 17-year old cousin) is a lot younger than me, I have NOTHING in common with her, FI had only met her once and had never even spoke with her, and I could not even recall myself ever having had a real conversation with her. And yet my aunt had assumed that she would be a bridesmaid in my wedding just because she’s the only female cousin I had and because I have no sisters.
She started a feud and tried to turn my entire family against me (telling everyone what a horrible inconsiderate person I was not choosing my cousin as a bridesmaid, and how CLEARLY that means I have no respect or love for our family whatsoever).
Then she made me second-guess every dress I had been looking at (I was looking at strapless dresses) by pointing out my scars on my back – “Oh. Wow. I hope you plan on going to a dermatologist, and getting some kind of chemical peel or treatment done to your back and shoulders, if you really plan on wearing a strapless dress??”
Then she made the fight with my dad even worse – my dad had paid her for something she was going to ship him, she never shipped it because of her anger at me. Six months later, he asked about it (he wasn’t mean, just said basically, “hey, I never got your package… did you send it? It may have gotten lost in the mail? If you didn’t send it yet, and if it’s easier, you could just send me my money back, no worries”). And she went off on him about how she spent his money, and he can go F*** himself if he wants it, and how he’s a terrible parent for having raised me to not care about family.
THEN she started telling my family lies about me to make them turn on me.
Luckily, my family all thought she was nuts, and all sided with me. But still, that was pretty stressful (especially since my mom died a while back, and my two aunts have always been like mother-figures to me…. and I’d NEVER seen this side of her).
Yeah. Weddings seem to bring out the crazy in some folks. :/
Post # 11
@xoxovmarie: Aint that the truth!
@lovelove1028: OH MAN! That is insane! I am so glad your family was on your side! I hope she is less crazy now!
Post # 12
Future GRANDMA in law. Yes. She’s been INSANE!!!! It may be onset of dementia but it has been hell.
1. she insisted on making our food for our wedding because it would be cheaper, our venue makes the food and doesn’t allow any outside food/beverage other than by licensed professionals
2. she complained when we sent the save the dates because it was a waste of HER money, she pays my fiance to cut the grass even though he refuses money each time. The STDs were $20 with the vistaprint groupon
3. at another family members shower she asked everyone at the table how much they weighed and told them how many pounds overweight they were
4. she’s appalled that our bridesmaids dresses aren’t velvet…
5. everytime we see her she complains about the drive to the venue and when we offer to get her a ride, she refuses, then continues to complain about how she doesn’t want to drive
6. she told me she would kill me if I didn’t make seating assignments
those are just the ones that jump out in my memory, we’ve been planning for over a year now. This list could go on forever.
Post # 13
1) Mother. We have different tastes. Everything we chose for the wedding she didn’t like she told me. I would politely agree and then I was a horrible daughter.
She made me upset at my only bridal fitting.
She also wanted to invite random church memebrs and family members who I did not know. As my DH was paying for our reception, I told her I wanted our list at a certain number. She pitched a fit but I won.
She also wanted me to have flower girls. I did not want any. She pitched a fit. I did give in and I’m ok with it. My 4 cousins were adorable that day.
At wedding reception she did not give a speech but said in a loud voice I was a “bridezilla”.
2) Aunt. She was my day of coordiator. The way our mega church is set up we have three aisles, one main and two secondary. I wanted everyone to use the main aisle and guest to sit in the main two rows. Well she felt only I deserved the main aisle and the BP should walk down the secondary ones. When I told her no, I was told my wedding ideas were tacky and she was not going to listen to me. She was nicely fired.
She and her family had planned my moms wedding 30 years ago and wanted to do the same with me. I’m not a push over like my mom. They didn’t like that.
3) Godmother was upset I did not have her daughter as a BM. I only chose my sisters and my closest girlfriends.
4) Cousin was upset I would not let her bring a date. She was divorced from her husband who the family still loved and was dating a man who was beating her. Sadly, she died from a medical condition 6 weeks before our wedding. I shocked the s*&** out of all of us.
Eventually, I just stopped talking about the wedding to everyone but my then FI. I learned the art of “we are still planning that, thank you” or “that has already been decided but thank you for your input”.
Post # 14
My FIL. In the beginning, he gave his opinion on EVERYTHING and told us everything he “knew” about everything (dress, flowers, etc.). He wasn’t too bad though!
Post # 15
- Wedding: October 2014 - Restaurant
My step-mother of all people! She is so concerned about being INCLUDED in everything. She did help raise me and I want her to be very present in everything, but it’s like she wants to totally push out my real mom! Definitely not as stressful at some your these other stories though.
Post # 16
FILs for sure. Keep in mind that they make just obscene amounts of money.
1. They suggested the x amount of money was “way too expensive” for a phototographer. Because they are so knowledgable about photographers. The last wedding they helped plan was their own.
2. The first time after they saw us after getting engaged (they live out of state), FFIL grabbed my hand in the airport and screamed ‘IS THAT A CZ?!’ IT’S HUGE’. It’s a 1 ct stone. It’s lovely and FI saved for years to afford it.
3. During the wedding budget conversation, they suggested that we have a semi-destination wedding on an island. 5 hours from us (and the nearest major airport) so that “no one would come, but we’d still get presents.”
4. FFIL said he would contribute to the wedding, but not to the ceremony part because that was “the bride’s part of the day” and he is only responsible for “keeping the car running in case FI gets cold feet.”
We’re only 4 months into planning…