Post # 1
So my Boyfriend or Best Friend (not engaged yet) and I were having bridal party discussions yesterday (see http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/sigh-i-want-a-bridal-party-but-he-doesnt)… and I realized that 1) none of the people I want in my bridal party — besides bro and SIL are Jewish; and 2) if Boyfriend or Best Friend doesn’t have a bridal party, he also won’t have anyone jewish besides his sister (his BIL is not Jewish).
We’re both very very secular Jews but the one thing my parents have said to me is that they expect me to have a Jewish wedding by a Rabbi and I love the Jewish ceremony and the Ketubah and everything else, but now I’m wondering who I would get to sign the Ketubah since I know it can’t be a relative.
Could my SIL (not blood related) sign?
Who is signing your Ketubah?
Post # 3
The ketubah witnesses need not be people in your bridal party. As for who can sign, check with your rabbi. Ours (Reform) was okay with our having nonJewish witnesses, which definitely simplified things.
Post # 4
@google: agree with the PP. Your signers do not need to be in the bridal party, neither of our witnesses were.
And again it depends on your officiant, but some will allow non-Jewish signers. Our cantor told us we did need non-blood related Jewish signers, so we had DH’s uncle (through marriage) and my good friend sign.
My sister however had her BIL sign (so blood related to her DH) and a mutual friend who was not Jewish.
Post # 5
I was really surprised with what my Rabbi told us about signing the ketubah. He said it can not be a blood or NONE blood relative. So not even someone married in! I was upset by this because I wanted my aunt’s (father’s sister) husband to sign it, but now he can’t.
So we are using a really good friend of mine from High School, and a close family friend of FI’s parents (who we spend high holidays with and Thanksgiving). Both are Jewish.
I am not sure if this is every Rabbi’s rule, but I would ask.
Post # 6
my rabbi did not have a problem with relatives but does want them jewish
Post # 7
our very close friends (friends of my family) who are like second parents to me are signing our ketubah. Our ketubah was really expensive (over $1000) and after we asked them to sign it, they told us they were going to buy it for us as our wedding present. So its super special and meaningful to us.
Post # 8
4 close family friends. Our rabbi said no relatives, had to be Jewish and preferably as observant as possible, but women are ok as witnesses (I’m conservative). So we’re having 2 men and 2 women who have been close friends of my family and know FH and I well.
Post # 9
Our Conservative Rabbi wants Jewish males who are non-relatives, preferably shomer-shabbos. We chose a close family friend from each side, and both men were very touched to be asked.
Post # 10
I have an orthodox rabbi, so it will be him and two Jewish male witnesses who are not related and who keep shabbat. I am a convert, so this is very serious for Fiance and I as it will determine jewish lineage for future generations.