Post # 1
Is anyone else having this problem?
I know this is going to sound pathetic but I don’t have enough people to invite to our wedding from my side. First of all, we come from different cultures where alcohol is frowned upon which means I can’t invite the majority of my parents friends or relatives because they will be extremely offended to the point of severing relationships with my parents. My fiance seems to think that if they do that then they are not your real friends anyways but it does not work that way with my parents family and friends. They also don’t do things like slow dancing with the opposite sex or anything like that in their weddings.
My extended family has never been very supportive of my mom or sisters because we are not like them.
Post # 3
Well I agree with your fiance….if they will be offended at the mere prescence of alcohol that I think that is a little close minded. However, if that is there belief you pretty much know they wouldn’t come so why bother inviting? I don’t think you ever have the right or wront number of people at a wedding. You said you “don’t have enough people” I think just surrounding yourself with supportive people that love you that day is what is more important than the number of people attending. I would rather have a wedding with 5 people that love/support me than 100 that think bad about me and my family!
Congrats on your engagement!
Post # 4
I was basically hysterical over this aspect of my wedding, thinking that everyone would be judging me and assuming that nobody loved me.
Little by little, I just let it go. I’ve decided to send my save-the-dates out plenty early so that the few friends and family on my list have every chance in the world to attend. I’m including lots of information that makes the place I’m getting married sound just so awesome they won’t even think of missing out.
And then, whatever happens, I’m just letting it go.
Also, I intend to have ushers seat people evenly in the church, not bride-on-one-side, groom-on-the-other. As for the reception, everyone shall just mingle. Nobody’s going to be counting, and if they do, they’re a neurotic and you need not pay too much attention anyway.
Post # 5
Thank you so much for all of your encouragement. The ceremony is going to be at a hotel.
Post # 6
Even though I have no cultural or lifestyle issues with my extended family I am not inviting a single person from my side of the extended family. The simple reason is that they have never been close to me or shown any interest in my life growing up, and it would feel wrong to have a bunch of people present at my wedding who I have not spoken to in a long time. Instead, I’m inviting the other people who have become my adopted extended family: friends, friends of my parents who I saw freqently when growing up, even the parents of some of my own friends who have been “surrogate” extended family.
Don’t worry about even numbers, life is not equal for everyone and no one would expect you and your SO to have the same amount of family members. The most important thing is that you invite people you care about and that care about you. Remember this:
“Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind”