(Closed) Who will walk me down the isle??? please help

posted 9 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
1455 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I don’t think any dad here really qualifies as the clear winner, same with the brothers- no one sticks out. You are going to hurt a lot of feelings either way, and even though you don’t want to, it would probably be best to walk down alone.

If your grandma doesn’t want your mom to walk you down the aisle, who DOES she want to do it? Maybe whoever should do it would be very clear to your grandma?

Eventually if people keep offering to buy you things/pay for things you have to accept it with their wants, or do what YOU want without taking their $$. You can’t have it both ways, unfortunately 🙁

Post # 4
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

A lot of brides don’t have anyone walk them down the aisle. Is that an option?

Post # 5
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow. I’d walk yourself down the aisle all by yourself in your glorious bride-ness! I agree with kjpugs, tho, who does your gramma see as being so important? And also, nobody sticks out to me as “the” person if you aren’t that close with one person over another.

Post # 6
Member
76 posts
Worker bee

I’ve heard of ladies walking down the aisle with their fiance and to me that sounds quite nice. Then again, maybe your grandmother wouldn’t like that either. I think walking by yourself might be the best option here given there are so many differing opinions on what “should” happen.

Post # 7
Member
5755 posts
Bee Keeper

Do you have a Grandfather? That would eliminate all hard feelings,I would think.

Seems to me from what you’ve described,I would have either your Mother or Grandmother (she’d probably love it!) or both of them. Everybody seems to be breaking the old rules anyway,so why not?!

Post # 8
Member
599 posts
Busy bee

I agree with Miss Starlet. Just walk youself down the aisle (as long as it’s an option). Since many women are getting married older these days they do not need or want someone to “give them away”. You are you’re own woman so to speak.

Post # 9
Member
3332 posts
Sugar bee

If I were in your position, I might walk myself down. I’ve seen a couple of brides do that and you could even have your fiance meet you half way or something, if you wanted.  That can be really sweet.  Honestly, at this point, I think people are doing all kinds of different things, so it’s really acceptable to do something “non-traditional”.  I know I had my brother walk me down, because I don’t have a relationship with my dad.

Although, you should try to think about what YOU want the most.  If you really want it to be your mom, you should ask her.  Your grandma will understand–it’s YOUR day. 

Post # 10
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

well you said that you really want your mother’s ex-husband to walk you, so i think that is what you should do. since you want to involve the current husband as well you could honor him with the father-daughter dance. does that cover everybody? i would leave your actual father out as you were thinking, it doesn’t sound like he deserves that type of honor (i’m in the same situation there). maybe giving each of them a “dad duty” will try and make everyone happy:)

Post # 11
Member
908 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

You said your mom wants her current husband to walk you down the aisle and they are supposed to pay for the wedding.  Are they actually paying for the wedding?  If so, is your Mom’s ex even invited to the wedding? 

Who walked your Mom down the Aisle at her most recent wedding?

Is there one brother you are closest to?

Do you have a God-Father or grandfather? 

Post # 13
Member
883 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

First of all – dont take your grandmothers word on what your mother woudl or wouldnt want. Talk to her – she might really love the idea of walking you in which case, I’d go that way. I’d also talk to your mother about wanted her ex to walk you and see what she thinks. If its going to be a drama thing, by pass and go with the bro you are closest too.

Post # 14
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

get the oldest brother to walk you, I’m sure your other brothers would understand why, the older brother does get the respect!  I don’t know it’s complicated!!!

Post # 15
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’d have a chat with your mom – what does she think about walking you down the aisle herself? (Don’t ask her who she thinks should do it and add to the confusion, just ask her if she will!)

It’s horrible that everyone who contributes financially feels they can dictate what happens at your wedding… it may be too late, but stand firm about thanking them for their “obligation-free financial help” and don’t let them dictate what you do on your day!

If your mom declines, and as you say you’re closer to one brother – ask him!

Good luck no matter which way you go! 🙂

Post # 16
Member
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would walk alone or with fiance.

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