Post # 1
Yikes, somehow a fuse was lit, and one of my “ladies ” is spazzing on the other 3 about my stagette…because she wants us to go to a local bar that she and I used to haunt 6 years ago and I don’t want to. The other ladies are objecting, and she is getting freakishly pissed about it…and yes, I have made it clear directly to her in a phone call I have ZERO intention of going clubbing on my stagette, for some reason she thinks I will enjoy it once we are there.
Sitting back and watching the fur fly for now. I have 4 very strong minded gals standing up with me, so this should be interesting! If I have to I will step into the fray and make my own plans (yes, I am like that!)
Post # 3
I don’t get it- you seem to be almost excited that your bridesmaids are fighting about this. If it were me, I’d step in right now, tell them all to stop fighting, tell your one BM that you will NOT be going to the bar, and end it right now!
Poor BMs… I feel bad for them.
Post # 4
@Miss Root: They are adults, grown women, and I do not need to referee…yet. I think the 3 will prevail over the one trying to have it all her way. My MOH has asked me to not get involved at this point, though I did offer several times. The BM pushing so hard is known for manipulating things to get her own way, and the other 3 are wanting to handle her themselves. But, if it’s required, I will step in and make the decision to either cancel the whole thing, or make my own plans.
Im not enjoying it, it’s just happening right now and surprised me at the instant expolsive nature. It’s caught me off guard, and as I am not supposed to be involved in the planning, and not wanting to fire anyone up further, I came here to vent about it. For now I will sit back and observe the arguments, unless I deem it necessary to step in and referee. So far it hasn’t gotten nasty in any way, just arguing back and forth as to what I actually want vs what BM wants/thinks I want.
ETA, I have told her, in a phone call yesterday that actually seemed to set this whole ordeal in motion. Evidently she didn’t get it, and if she continues to push it and try to force it on everyone else, I will speak to her about it again, but I think the other 3 can bring her around to understand that when I said I really don’t want to, I meant I really don’t want to!
Post # 5
@Take The Reins: hehehe i actually find the humor in your post! I understand EXACTLY what you’re talking about. I swear that to this day, half of my bm are still not speaking to the other half. It’s all really messed up, but the reality at the end of the day? They’re all there for you and they just want what they think is the best for you. At least I think… 😛 Good luck getting through it, and you will! 🙂
Post # 6
@pengoala: Thanks, it’s not funny like rolling on the floor laughing funny, but it is funny in an odd way that such a stupid trivial thing has caused such strife between 4 grown woman (all but one over 30). I guess it’s mostly because the BM having issues has always been a dominant female and is very self centered. I used to bow to her demands, and she really hasn’t gotten past that. She is very manipulative also and is using tactics on the other 3 that they will not stand for, which is pissing her off even more because usually they work, but in this case, it’s 3 against 1. The other 3 ladies are also strong willed, but much easier going. The one insisting we go to the clubs and I were really close 6 years ago and we did go clubbing a lot back then, but since FI and settled down, she hasn’t much been part of things so I don’t think she realizes just how much my life has changed (she doesn’t have kids and is self employed). Of the other 3, one is in university finishing her degree that she has been working on for almost 7 years and the other 2 both have young kids, married and settled, so they all understand the changes my life has brought.
It’s just shocking that such a juvenille issue has fired up these gals.