Post # 1
In your situation, have you found that the bride’s family is generally more interested in the wedding than the groom’s. If so, why do you think that is?
I have definitely felt like my family has shown more excitement/interest in the wedding. When we got engaged, everyone in my family was over the moon with congratulations and hugs, etc. I don’t think anyone in FI’s family has congratulated us, at all. There were definitely no hugs, or anything. My family immediately took interest in wedding plans. FI’s family has only gotten interested in the past three months, or so. Even now, I feel like I am burdening them by talking about our wedding so much (I try not to, at all). Yet, my family asks so many questions it makes my head spin. I sent out invitations two Fridays ago. So far, I have gotten back 10 out of 27 RSVPs, and they’re ALL from my family. The other day, someone in my family said, “You know, we’ve all been sitting around waiting on your invitation like it was the golden ticket, or something. Like, if everybody was neighbors, the ones who got your invitation would be out at their mailbox singing, ‘I’ve got the golden ticket!'” I definitely don’t get that vibe from FI’s family, at all.
I am just curious everyone else’s take on this. Was your family more interested than your FI’s? Was your FI’s family more interested than yours? Did they both have equal interest?
Post # 3
In our situation the groom’s side is way more excited about the wedding. Maybe it’s because we live with them and because he is an only child. My parents are excited but they are kind of just whatever about the wedding.
Post # 4
I would think it most cases it would be the brides family because the bride is just naturally more involved in the wedding planning then the groom, so I would think her family would be more interested/ involved.
Post # 5
i think we got about equal excitement from both sides….. to come to our wedding that is. As for excitement in the actual planning and details, we didn’t seem to have much interest from either side. I suppose i involved my sister and mother more because i knew they would be most interested in some of the details like helping me decide on a dress. And my mom helped me settle on a photographer. That was about it. I was also away on internship during my planning so it was easier for me to do most of it by myself. When i went home for the holidays, i had one day where my mom and sister came and did wedding errands with me all day which was fun.
Post # 6
Both sides are really excited. Both mothers are involved in a lot of the planning – it’s long distance for both of them, so I keep bouncing ideas off of everyone so everyone feels included.
Post # 7
We had a wedding across the country from both of our families. My mom was more interested in helping plan/pay for things, but more people from his family wanted to make the trip out to be there.
Post # 8
The grooms family is more interested in the actual wedding. My mom only cares about money (and she’s not even paying), my sister doesn’t want to go and has been trying to sabotage it as best as she can(jealous unmarried/single big sister whose ex recently got engaged…not sure what I have to do with that exactly but whatever…), my father is not coming (he’s too embarrassed for my mother to see him I think). Fi’s family is very excited about our wedding. I feel like his family are to only people who actually WANT to go and his parents don’t even like me. He’s an only child too.
Post # 9
My family could not care less. FI’s family is SO excited. I think it matters that this is my second wedding and his first.
ETA — We’ve received 14 rsvps since we sent our invites last week. Not one of them came from my half of the guest list. 🙁
Post # 10
In our case, it’s my family. My parents, grandpa, aunts, and uncles have all sent us their best wishes, asked questions, etc. My parents are always ready to be a sounding board and offer advice and support.
FI’s family, on ther other hand, seems to be uninterested. Fiance still hasn’t heard from some of his family after he called and left them messages to tell them we’re engaged and it’s been nearly two months. His Dad didn’t speak to us about it until almost a month later, and even then he was drunk. Fiance feels so bad and hurt by it.
Post # 11
Both of our families were equally excited. But his family got to show it more because mine lives 3,000 miles away. His mom got into it and threw me a bridal shower, went dress shopping with me, and was the person I bounced a lot of ideas off. I’m really lucky to have such an amazing Mother-In-Law.
My family was excited about it too. Ours was a Destination Wedding (my family lives in Hawaii) so my brothers did alot of running around for wedding stuff on their end. We were also the first children to get married on both sides so there was alot of bonding over interpreting wedding etiquette.
Post # 12
The majority vote so far is in favor of the bride’s family. I don’t think I ever expected this to be an issue, before we got engaged. FI’s siblings are all messed up, in one way or another. None of them have ever done right. I was just thinking the Future In-Laws would be proud of Fiance. But, I really don’t think they are. Future Mother-In-Law will sometimes brag to people about the wedding, but she’s definitely not as excited as my mom is.