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Jill and Jack on the invitations and pretty much everything up until you are married. After that it is Jack and Jill. So your programs would read the marriage of Jill and Jack, but your own personal escort card would read Jack and Jill.
That's how I have always seen it also. Things like the engraving on your serving set would be Jack and Jill. This was a good question.
With most invites, especially if the bride's parents are paying, usually the bride's name goes first.
For example: Sue and John Jones request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Abby Jones to... GROOM...
15H_Wedding_Memories.jpg (57 KB, 22 downloads) 2 years old 
I didn't see anyone comment on the monograms, so I figured I would. Monograms for weddings are always:
(Jill's first initial) (Last) (Jack's first initial)
I know someone in my family who ended up having their monogram flipped on their cake server because the gift giver was unaware. So make sure yor initial comes first! :-)
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Out of curiosity, who's name usually goes first on things like invites (well, I know it's usually the groom's and his parents first), STDs (I've seen both ways), websites or monograms? I have looked back on my friends' stuff that I've kept and their old websites; and on everything but the formal invite, it's a 50/50. Some have had the girl's name first and some have had the guy's name first. So is it Jack and Jill or Jill and Jack?