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My sister (MOH) was a big part of planning my shower and she also lives far away. It's not as easy to do, but it is possible. I would talk to her about it, maybe she could get someone local, like your mom, to help her out.
My mom and my sister are throwing mine for me. And we live in different states too. I didnt want one because of the work involved, but I hope it turns out ok. Maybe put some feelers out there and tip-toe around it. Or who knows they could be doing a surprise shower?
All of my bridesmaids got together to help plan a shower for me. Do you have anyone else in your wedding party besides your sisters? Just because your FMIL is paying for the rehearsal dinner I don't think it's asking too much to throw a small shower for you, and I think they say typically your own mother shouldn't be the one hosting anyhow?
Every bride deserves one so don't be embarrased ;)
FMIL is having my shower. not what i had in mind, but she didn't really ask- she just told me that's what was happening. which is fine, it's very sweet of her. she seems to be having fun with it so i'm glad it makes her happy. (you mentioned your FILs hosting your rehersal dinner, ours are not, so i guess this is her time to plan a party)
My MOH (lives 5 hours away in another state) is planning my shower, with the help of my other BMs who are more local. I know they've been e-mailing back and forth to work out details. I offered my house for convenience and so they don't have to stress about finding a place to have it.
My grandmother is hosting a big one and my friend Kelly is hosting a smaller one (although I won't be asking for gifts twice from the repeat guests of course!)
I'm so sorry that you havent heard about shower plans yet... could you just ask your mom or a close girlfriend? Or could you ask your FI to maybe mention something to his mother?
Sorry to hear that. My MOH will do mine. Maybe you could still do an online registry somewhere and it receive gifts and celebrate it with a small local group?
My mom and my sister are planning the main shower for me, and FMIL is planning a shower for everyone at church.
As far as I know my MOH and bridesmaids are hosting it with the help of my mom, aunt and FMIL. It KILLS me not knowing what’s going on. I tend to micromanage things and having thrown a handful of showers myself, I know what I want and what I don’t want. If only it wasn’t tacky to throw our own showers, lol.
My mom did mine, but held it in her hometown (a halfway point for me and her and where almost all the guests were from).
I have a cousin that's a bridesmaid that helped out and did the games and the gift recording. My other bridesmaid is terrible. .. she never even bothered to RSVP to it.
It was nice, but a little bit of a letdown, too. Some of the girls I work with were going to do one or at least a night of dinner and drinks where we live... but that hasn't happened and I don't think it's going to at this point.
@UpstateCait: We should have thrown each others... you know. ;) Then they'd be perfect for us, ha!
i have no brides maids, my sisters are married and are... well... over it (weddings). my best friend is too jealous to even be able to talk about it. i'm pretty much on my own and got nobody to throw a shower either. which sucks...
Bridal Showers are a big secret thing in South Afirca. I am sure my MOH and bridesmaids will throw me one. The bride usually thinks she is going to some other event and gets suprised by the whole thing- I wonder if they will actually be able to suprise me- the only person who has sucessully done this was my FI when he proposed :P
I had two, my FIs aunts threw me one and then my aunt threw me one.
@Heidigm221:agreed!
our (joint) bridesmaid is throwing us one, though I'm not gonna lie, we may have hinted around that we wanted one!!! And my mom was gonna throw me one, but I said no because since we live so far apart and I'm only going to be seeing her a couple days before the wedding, she wanted to throw one the day before the wedding. To me, day-before-the-wedding showers seem like gift-grabs.
My Sister (MOH) but shes 18, so basically my mom. I couldnt imagine not having one, just because its tradition. She has already talked to me about it. Why dont you just mention it? to a close bridesmaid or your mom... it dosent have to be big and fancy... just some apps and girls getting together!
(I read this title as "Who's throwing up in the shower"...)
My mother, MOH, and MIL all hosted my shower. It was great to see them acting as a family together and meeting all of my friends :)
My aunt is throwing my shower (she does it for all our cousins) and my FSIL is hosting a family bbq/shower as well.
My sister/MOH and another BM are conspiring for my bachelorette.
There will be no guest overlap for these as the showes are family events only.
No one is throwing me a shower because I am a loser and no one loves me.
Hahah but seriously, I am pretty sure no one is throwing me a shower because
1) they all live so dang far away
b) my moh is clueless and has never been in a wp before (I love her and she is awesome, but versed in weddings she is not)
cat) my mom is going to Iceland for 2 weeks prior to the wedding so she is super busy planning her life & travel arrangements.
4) both my siblings have new borns and are a little pre-occupied with their progeny atm.
@thewheelsonthebus: Um, yea!! They would have been like the coolest showers ever!
@firsttimemom: Haha, is the morning sickness getting to you? lol
Well my shower is a mish mash of everyone helping, but I did have a lot of say in it. I know this is probably weird judging by most of the PP's responses, but in my circle, it's not uncommon for the bride to help out and have a lot of say in the shower. We typically do big banquet hall type showers, and the mother of the bride usually pays for it, while the bridal party runs the day sorta. Maybe you could bring it up and offer to help, while they would "host" it? That way it's less work for them, but you still get the experience. I think everyone deserves a bridal shower, I would talk to your mom about it.
For me, my dad has offered to pay for it, my FMIL and my mother are helping a bit, and my girls are doing the games that day and sorta running it. But I chose most of the stuff, and have been kept in the loop.
Hope this helps!
I don't think I'll be getting a shower either. My bridesmaids are working on a bachelorette party for me, which is nice. I have female family, but they're all pretty busy with their own kids and lives and stuff. All my family and friends are so spread out that I don't even know where they would hold it if there was one.... Its okay though, just a bit of a let down.
I feel like a bridal shower is really about showing support and love for the bride, something I feel like I lack sometimes. Wow I feel childish. "no one pays any attention to me!! wah wah wah" But thats how I feel a lot of the time.
</pity party>
I am one of the first of my friends to get married, so most of my BMs probably wouldn't really know where to start with planning a shower...plus they're scattered all over the country. My shower is being hosted by 7 of my mom's friends and 2 of my aunts in my hometown, across the country from where I live now. My mom's friends are like a shower throwing machine (there is always one with a daughter getting married!) That said, it will probably be more of my mom's friends than mine because of where it is located.
My sister who was also my MOH threw my shower. My SIL doesn't have a bridal party and her family won't throw her a shower since its not tradition for them to, so i will be hosting one for her.
My mom is hosting one in my hometown and my FMIL is hosting one in FI's hometown
I'm actually having two - one in my hometown (which is not where I currently live, but where my parents and their friends all are still) that is being hosted by my godmother and my mom's 2 other best friends, and then one being hosted by FI's aunts and cousins in their hometown. There won't be any repeat guests and they are in two different states (and both different places from where I currently live!)
It doesn't have to be someone in your bridal party to host the bridal shower for you. Maybe an Aunt or Your mom's Best Friend? My mum's bff offered to host the shower for me. I would talk to your mom and tell her you would really like one!!
My mom is throwing it with help from MOH I think.
I'll probably get a mini one from work too.
My MOH is throwing my bridal shower (with the help of the other BMs and my mom is throwing me a lingerie shower (she really wants more grandkids LOL) :)
I swore that I wouldn't have a shower after I got engaged... but my mum begged, pleaded and said I'd regret it if I didn't have one. Now I might be having two, but I'm thinking of trying to convince my FMIL to just have a joint one with both friends and family. Otherwise, my cousins are planning mine. The only part I'm involved is the guest list, invites and registry. Otherwise, I told them to go to town. Though we did collectively agree that it would be more of a come-and-go get together with drinks, appies, desserts, etc. with no games or opening of the gifts in front of everyone. I'd rather spend my time visiting with the ladies then oo-ing and aw-ing over gifts that no one is really paying attention to anyway. They'll all get their heart-felt thank you's for coming and then in the mail for any gifts.
FI's aunt threw one, and both of my jobs. My MOH planned a lingerie shower, but it got canceled as everyone RSVPed no.
This thread is making me feel so much better! I was starting to feel really weird about all the comments on the bee about it being inappropriate for a mom/immediate family member to through a shower!
My mom and MOH (18yo sister) will be throwing me a shower in my hometown. My aunt will be throwing me another shower where all my extended family lives.
My mother, soon to be sister in law and soon to be mother in law are throwing mine for me. I hadn't even considered one until they mentioned it, and they said they didn't want me to miss out on any of the 'bridal experience.'
My mom and 2 sisters who are my maids of honor are throwing me one in 15 days!. My team leader at work threw me a surprise one with co-workers last month.
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I am so bummed out that noone will throw me a shower. Not that I think I'm entitled to, but it would be nice to have one. My two sisters are currently getting divorced so their minds are not focused into my wedding planning. One of those sisters is my maid of honor and we live in opposite part of the country so even if she wanted to organize one it would be hard not living in the same state where I am.
My mom who is here has not even mentioned anything about the shower. It is not our tradition, since we were not born or raised in the united states. I think (hope) my FMIL will throw me one, but I feel embarrased because that should be something planned by my family since FMIL is paying for the rehearsal dinner.
I'm just curious who's hosting your bridal shower?