Why a wedding planner/event coordinator is key. Horror story.

posted 3 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@hellosteinberg:  A lot of what you posted sounds like a lack of common sense. That does sound like a train wreck wedding…poor couple! Some folks don’t have the money to hire a wedding planner but they still do a great job pulling everything together. I personally wouldn’t spend the money and I did try to consider as many contingencies as I could. That said, I’m sure something will go wrong as it always does. Luckily only I know how it is supposed to go so I’m sure no one will notice. Even if they do, I’m okay with that 🙂

Post # 4
3089 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@MrsPanda99:  A lot of what you posted sounds like a lack of common sense

That’s exactly what I was thinking

Post # 5
1019 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yikes, what a nightmare.

Although, I didn’t have a planner (only a day-of coordinator) and didn’t run in to any of those problems. It takes common sense and a bit of research to choose reputable vendors – not a wedding planner.

Post # 6
11469 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

@hellosteinberg:  Ack! Did they get married in Palm Springs?

The best money we ever spent was our wedding coordinator. She was absolutely worth it and went above and beyond at every step. Our wedding was perfection thanks to her.

Post # 8
1681 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@hellosteinberg: On the plus side, the bride and groom got married. So aside from the unfortunate injury of a guest, everything was fine and they’re both probably pretty happy right now.


ETA: Didn’t have a wedding planner. Our guests said it was one of the best weddings they ever attended. Awesome food, beautiful decor, and well-thought out details. 


Post # 10
559 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

To be fair, not all of those things would have required a wedding planner to figure out. I would never have an outdoor wedding out in the heat, and it doesn’t take any special knowledge or experience to realize that raw food in the heat equals food poisoning. My fiance and I have thought about amount of food and beverages vs how many people and have discussed this at length with our experienced vendors. We have thought about building and bathroom access and we know how to read a contract. Honestly it sounds more like the couple was careless or not very smart.

That’s not to say planners aren’t valuable. They certainly DO think of details that we wouldn’t, and their experience comes in handy. We have consulted with many professionals in planning our wedding and we wish we could afford at least a day-of coordinator. But honestly many of the things you listed above just sound like the couple was pretty foolish.

Post # 11
3442 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@hellosteinberg:  I had a 6k wedding for 100 people without a coordinator & it turned out pretty darn decent.

I’m not saying a coordinator wouldn’t have been awesome, but to say that somebody *needs* one seems like a scare tactic. If you have a good amount of common sense, common decency for your guests, and aren’t looking to have a huge amount of formality, then one can totally do it on their own.

It sounds to me like the problem with the bride & groom in your story is that they lacked common sense & a solid understanding of their contracts.

Post # 12
5533 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2011

Eh, a person who better planned in general could have avoided some of those issues without a planner too. Anyone thinking “hey, I am having a wedding in the desert in the middle of summer” needs to think a second time. A brain was needed, not a wedding planner. 

Post # 14
7055 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@hellosteinberg:  The problem was not lack of a planner, but lack of common sense. Points 1-4 and 8 were because they held it at a private residence. Points 5 and 6 were because they apparently didn’t use experienced vendors. Points 7 and 9 were because they didn’t check out the people they were hiring.

Post # 15
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Sounds like the bride had little to no experience planning any kind of party and very little idea of how to make guests comfortable.

I’m not using a planner, but I’m a dilligent researcher.

Common sense will get you far in life. She sounds like the type of individual who would actually paint herself into a corner.

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