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Maid Of Honor Drama.....HELP!

why can't david tutera pick me :(

posted 2 years ago in Money
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    1.
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    Helper bee
    shainajane    December 30, 2010  

    OK. so, I am planning a december wedding. and everything im getting is all second hand (even my dress! which was too big when i bought it so i need to get it taken in.) it sucks to not have my dream wedding, but my parents have 4000 in savings total and they are emptying that to pay for my wedding. and i know it will still be nice. ive lucked out and got hall rental for free but we have to pay the workers and food (at cost). but otherwise, i cant find anyone willing to even do a cake for me, and i certainly cant find a photographer. am i crazy or is thinking 2000 for pictures is a little too much? it makes me cry but at this point we arent having an actual photographer. i believe an aunt is going to take some pictures at the ceremony. but she just likes to take pictures and they arent always good. and ahhhh. someone just tell me its ok! we are asking my fiances parents to cover the bar. we havent even started to try to add in hotel costs and things like that. most of the guests are going to be coming from out of town. ahhh.

    anyone have any advice? or like, know david tutera and could tell him i need his help! haha.

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    SanDiegoAli    September 18, 2010   San Diego

    I'm sorry you feel that you can't have your "dream" wedding, but I think about a lot of us who are on a budget feel your pain.  Maybe you should hold off another year to give yourself an opportunity to save some more first?

     

    As far as a photog, have you checked Craigslist?  Maybe you could find a very talented beginner in your price range?  I actually don't think $2000 is too much to pay for photos - your photog is probably a pro so in addition to paying for their tiem, you are also paying for their talent AND all the post wedding processing.  It's not "just" the time on your wedding day.

    And why are you paying for hotel rooms for your oot guests?  That should be something that is on them.

     

    Good luck!!

     
    3.
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    Busy bee
    JennyChicago    August 7, 2010  

    Aaaaw Why dont you just wait a little longer? I would hate to hink you miss out on a wedding of your dreams because of money... Also dont invite a lot of people just close friends and family! I totally would have done that if I could have gotten away with it!

     
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    Buzzing bee
    kate169    May 21, 2011   Virginia

    That is very nice of your parents to give you what they can for your wedding. My parents are giving us a little bit, but mostly we are just saving up ourselves. Just by doing things like not eating out, canceling the gym membership and getting outside, not getting nails done or haircuts, etc. My fiance is even looking for a part time job to supplement our incomes.

    2000 for pics is pretty reasonable to me. Our photographer is around 3000...but the pics are the only thing we'll have left so I want good ones. That is not to say you couldn't find a student, or someone who is new to your area and looking to build their portfolio.

    There are lots of ways to save...just keep an open mind and don't stress too much. After all, it really is just one day out of many you get to spend with your love.

     
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    Helper bee
    shainajane    December 30, 2010  

    i know everyone thinks 2000 for pics is reasonable. but i dont want 8 hours of coverage. i dont know i just got discourages when someone who i grew up with, has been giving free pictures to everyone (we grew up in church together) but when it came to me they wanted full price. i thought that was a little bogus. i just dont want 8 hours coverage, or even coverage of the entire reception. i dont need 100 snap shots of everyone from a professional. i dont know i just feel like someone out there should want some business from people who cant always afford it, 2000 is 1/3 of my entire wedding budget. thats kinda ridiculous. but i dont know. hopefully someone will decide to work with me because so far no one wants to sway from their set prices.

    and as for money, we are planning to go off to finish up my degree next year, and i dont want to live together before we're married and ive already put off my degree for 2 years pretty soon my credits are going to expire. so, we just wanted to get married. its just so hard to find jobs where i live, he's got a good one but mine is just a little 18 hour a week min wage. so hopefully something will open up this summer so i can get a second job, but for now i make next to nothing.

    and just to vent because thats what i need to do right now, my mom has been in the hospital this whole week and i feel awful still even wanting to do my wedding because i know that its going to take some extra money to pay off the hospital bills. thank god for insurance, but theres still a lot we have to pay.

     

    ahhhh i dont know. maybe i should wait. but its just going to complicate things if we do. i dont know. but thanks for the input!

     
    6.
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    Worker bee
    shunnedbride    September 25, 2010   Indiana

    Maybe you could find a photog student to take your pics?  Is there a college nearby?  They would probably love the experience and you'd get a good deal!!  David Tutera is great- BUT- there is no reason you can't do what he does- for much less!!  Think in terms of a single type of flower- and lots of them for impact!  You can do it girlie!  Think positive!

     
    7.
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    Blushing bee
    ldyparadox99    September 10, 2010   Netherlands

    Have you thought of looking for a student at an liberal arts college that is majoring in photography? You can get away with good photographs for next to nothing and they get to build their portfolio. 

    If you have a liberal arts college nearby, go and put a notice up on their board in their community room or whatever they call it.

     

     
    8.
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    Bee Keeper
    His Barista    September 4, 2010   Spokane, WA

    I'm sorry you're feeling like this. A lot of people feel that way when they're on a budget. I'm with you on thinking that 2k is too much for photograpghy. Then again, it's not one of my priorities. I second trying a post on craigs list for the amount you can pay. Sometimes a student will do it for cheap to enhance their portfolio.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    kate169    May 21, 2011   Virginia

    Have you looked at any photographers who offer a la carte options? A lot of the ones I  was looking at offer packages for people who don't need eight hours of coverage. You can sometimes buy hourly for like 200 an hour or so. I know it's easy to get discouraged...but you'll make it happen.Laughing

     
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    Buzzing bee
    flamingred    June 19, 2010  

    I'm confused-why do you have to be married to finish school? And why will your credits expire? I think they are good until ten years.

     
    11.
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    Helper bee
    shainajane    December 30, 2010  

    thanks for all the encouraging stuff!

     

    and for school--i just dont want to live together before we're married and my school with the degree i want (marine biology) is about 5 hours from our hometown. and while we could live in separate dorms i just feel like that would be a waste of money when they offer married couple dorms.

    and a lot of my science credits like majors bio and microbiology expire after 5 years i believe it may be 4 years. so i have 2 years left to get into something and put them towards it.

     

    im hopeful i will find something especially with the photography. i think things will come together eventually. i just wish i could have the things i want, i have cought myself giving up everything i want to make everyone else happy and thats tiring.

     
    12.
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    Helper bee
    Erisque    November 1, 2009   Baltimore, Maryland

    I didn't have quite as low a budget as you, but there are ways to make it work...you just need to decide what your priorities are. I had my wedding on a Sunday afternoon and brought in my own alcohol to minimize costs. I was able to find my photographer for free on the Classifieds board here on Weddingbee; she was a commercial photographer looking to change fields and needed to photograph some more weddings to build her portfolio. I'm also in the Offbeat Bride Tribe and I found a fabulous invitation designer who designed all of our paper goods (I made them all) for under $50. There are deals out there, but it does take a LOT of time and energy to find them.

     

    Alternatively, if you really want a big wedding, why not have a courthouse wedding now, so you can live together at school, and then have a big wedding when you have some more money saved?

     
    13.
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    Helper bee
    shainajane    December 30, 2010  

    Well, I know everyone is going to think im complaining over nothing after i say this.

    our hall is free, minus the food which we are getting at cost so its really cheap.
    my brother and a friend are doing save the dates and invitations
    my mom is making flowers
    and either I myself or a family friend is makin my cake.

    everything I am doing is really really cheap if not free.

    except the photographer. i dont know. theres so many ideas. im just afraid that if we get married at the court house, then we wont ever have a big wedding. and i know its kinda silly but thats all i really want. ive dreamt about it for years and now its really happening. i just dont want to give it up incase it never happens. i dont know.

    but ill have to check out off beat bride. never looked at it.

    bahh thank you all for letting me vent :)

     

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